Because I stole them off a local police bike and it has bright yellow lettering saying "Special Austin PD Edition." It also has neon green lettering saying "Save the environment, ride a bike," I mean F that, we should all drive big SUVs and hit any cyclist on the road... the sidewalks are where the bikes belong gawddammit. It also has pink ribbon and lettering that says "Breast cancer awareness," but I'm a *****exual and I hate boobies. There's also some baby blue lettering that says "adopt a puppy," and I hate puppies, I only like them with wasabi sauce or deep fried.
Now how do I remove all those annoying letterings without causing damage to my stolen tires?