How Dark was The Dark Side?
I went from a 115 pound young gal at 24 when I went into the service to THIS 183 POUND BLOB six years ago when I started cycling "to loose the weight". I was so ashamed of myself I wore circus tents for sweatshirts and boy jeans (they fit). I was also too ashamed to show my (round) face.
Talk about deriving joy, then trying to achieve goals, in cycling. You're looking at why, in my case.