Maybe you should go back into New Jersey. I've done Alpine Hill, and the rest of River Road, 3 of the last 4 weekends, and on the missing weekend I've done Bear Mountain.
There are lots of hills on the other side of the bridge which are easily accessible.
As for Harlem hill, I can power myself over it without much problem myself, but find it almost impossible to avoid the crowds so you don't have to slow down. Once I've slowed, that's the end of it.