Hey 5matt,
Other commuters in this forum told me my commute was too long, as well. Don't let them get you down. There are others out there in the same situation as you. My current commute is 23 miles one way with roughly 300 ft of climbing. Some days I take the bus part or all of the way, if I'm sick/bad weather/lazy.
Here are my work amenities:
Shower
Lockers
Coat rack in my communal office
When I get to work, I go straight to my locker and get my shower bag and work clothes. It's a mesh bag with flip flops, body wash, a loofah, a microfiber towel and deodorant. I keep 3 days of work clothes in my locker... I have been known to rotate through the clothes without washing during the week. Obviously at this point I get clean and put all my shower artifacts in my mesh bag. In the office I hang my clothes off the rack, and point a small office fan I purchased directly on the mesh bag and my hanging clothes. Wool clothing gets a serious nod here in the winter - it doesn't stink. In the summer I will rinse my cycling gear in the shower with me to avoid stinking up the office. During the day I will attend to the rack a few times and move items around to ensure they are dry by the time I leave work. It has the nice side effect of giving me an excuse to a few minutes break here and there. Nobody complains about me or my gear smelling up the office
My greatest asset to this routine is the small office fan. Without it, my wool clothes were still damp come quitting time. Others have commented that they will get wet again soon after getting on the bike... but if its cold outside I would prefer to delay the onset of chilly nipples.
I try to plan meals for the week before I hit the grocery store. Since I'm saving so much by not owning a car, I splurge on occasional meals out for lunch. This is one area I'm not too religious on.
On bike-only days, I leave 2 hours before work and this gives me 100 minutes to ride, 10 minutes to shower, and 10 minutes for leeway. It takes about the same amount of time to get home. On good days it only takes me 80ish minutes to do the ride. It's a commitment, but you will feel accomplished.
Hope my experiences help!