Antonio Fartoni, captain of Team Taco Bell, holding his arms out after a last second anal gas expulsion pushed him to victory in the final feet of the road race commented, ``It was close, but at the last minute -- FRAAAAP! -- and there I was, winner! Though I do think that maybe I shat myself.'' The second place cyclist, German Klaus Dumkpoff later commented, ``I don't know what happened, but it wasn't natural. I think something may have crawled up his ass and died. The Toxic Avenger is a cunning opponent.'' Third place finisher, Pierre LeCrycry added, ``Captain Ass Gas, he cheats. We French shall someday win again!''
Edit: Man, I hate that Rusto. He totally snuck in his reply while I was watching football highlights.