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  1. #1
    部門ニ/自転車オタク NomadVW's Avatar
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    I'm a bike dork.

    Fact is, I'm just not as cool as the rest of you.

    I was a crap athlete in school (I could run, but never at the top of the competition). I played a dozen musical instruments, programmed computers in the early 80's until the present. I carry a 3.98 GPA (5 classes from the BA). I programmed for an online RPG for 6 years. My job is essentially 9 hours a day of trigonometry. In the 34 years of my life, I've always been a dork.

    So... what makes me a "bike dork?"

    My training logs are as anal retentive as they can be. I've now even programmed my excel spreadsheets in VBA because I don't trust Cyclingpeaks algorithms anymore.

    I can tell you how to record Cycling.tv videos with 4 different video capture programs, but I couldn't list more than a dozen bike racers of interest to anyone.

    I don't know the difference between Tour of Flanders and Ronde de Vlanderen (or whatever)

    I can throw up the victory salute a lap early!

    Finally, though I've ridden some 50,0000 km in the last three years in clipless pedals, I can ride over to the light pole with the "Push for the Walk signal", and then successfully TIP OVER when the front wheel catches on the edge of the sidewalk at one of the busiest intersections in the county completely clipped in.

    Cheers,
    VW
    Envision, Energize, Enable

  2. #2
    Peloton Dog patentcad's Avatar
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    So you are a utterly hopeless bike weenie/dork/nerd, but you are still faster than most of us. Which should be ample consolation. And you do win the high mileage pissing contest every year Nomad.

  3. #3
    How much does it weigh? prendrefeu's Avatar
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    Weight weenies keep it light.

    Director of the Midnight Express Ride; Board of Directors, Los Angeles County Bicycle Coalition.

  4. #4
    Aut Vincere Aut Mori Snuffleupagus's Avatar
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    Last I checked, nobody here is in Belgium, where cycling might pass as cool.

    Hence: We're ALL dorks. It's a dorky sport. A really, really, really hard - dorky sport.

    On the other hand, it'll suffice to say that my dork/nerd credentials are firmly established, enough so that cycling probably makes me less dorky.

  5. #5
    starting pistol means war YMCA's Avatar
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    Thank you Nomad for owning up to all those power graphs, power numbers and power powers.

    New-school bike racer= dork w/ numbers
    Old-school bike racer = a-hole w/ something to prove

    Lance fit both categories, but everyone else is one or the other. I'm obviously the latter.

  6. #6
    Aut Vincere Aut Mori Snuffleupagus's Avatar
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    Dorks can't be assh*les?

    Screw that noise

  7. #7
    B(.)(.)BS badfishgood's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by NomadVW View Post
    I can tell you how to record Cycling.tv videos with 4 different video capture programs
    I love dorks.

    PM sent.
    Shallow genius, deep idiot.

  8. #8
    Trying to keep up ericcox's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by NomadVW View Post
    Fact is, I'm just not as cool as the rest of you.

    I was a crap athlete in school (I could run, but never at the top of the competition). I played a dozen musical instruments, programmed computers in the early 80's until the present.
    I carry a 3.98 GPA (5 classes from the BA). I programmed for an online RPG for 6 years. My job is essentially 9 hours a day of trigonometry. In the 34 years of my life, I've always been a dork.

    So... what makes me a "bike dork?"

    My training logs are as anal retentive as they can be. I've now even programmed my excel spreadsheets in VBA because I don't trust Cyclingpeaks algorithms anymore.

    I can tell you how to record Cycling.tv videos with 4 different video capture programs, but I couldn't list more than a dozen bike racers of interest to anyone.

    I don't know the difference between Tour of Flanders and Ronde de Vlanderen (or whatever)

    I can throw up the victory salute a lap early!

    Finally, though I've ridden some 50,0000 km in the last three years in clipless pedals, I can ride over to the light pole with the "Push for the Walk signal", and then successfully TIP OVER when the front wheel catches on the edge of the sidewalk at one of the busiest intersections in the county completely clipped in.

    Cheers,
    VW
    Off topic: You're currently working on your BA, or need to go back and finish? Regardless, well done on the GPA. I just evaluated applications for a pretty select program at my university and many would be thrilled with that.

    On topic: wearing of lycra pretty much makes us all dorks. I avoid mirrors when dressed in cycling gear as I think that would generate a little too much self-loathing.

  9. #9
    部門ニ/自転車オタク NomadVW's Avatar
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    Side note - I have full subscriptions to cycling.tv and have purchased the recording software I use. In my dorkier and younger/poorer days, I'd have figured a way around all that, but being able to watch last year's Gent Wevelgem crash fest a year later is well worth the money spent.
    Envision, Energize, Enable

  10. #10
    Peloton Dog patentcad's Avatar
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    Yeah Nomad, NICE GRADES. Well done. Aren't you an Air Traffic Controller? You're not vectoring any aircraft into each other are you?

  11. #11
    部門ニ/自転車オタク NomadVW's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ericcox View Post
    Off topic: You're currently working on your BA, or need to go back and finish? Regardless, well done on the GPA.
    I'm working on it VERY slowly. I should be done next year. I was carrying 8 courses per year, but have slowed way down to ride more
    Envision, Energize, Enable

  12. #12
    Trying to keep up ericcox's Avatar
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    At least you have your priorities straight.

  13. #13
    部門ニ/自転車オタク NomadVW's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by patentcad View Post
    Yeah Nomad, NICE GRADES. Well done. Aren't you an Air Traffic Controller? You're not vectoring any aircraft into each other are you?
    I don't do any vectoring these days. I do procedure design/evaluation now for the Navy/Marine Corps. It's a desk job, engineers rulers, drafting table and a computer.

    Wanna fly into Thailand in May? I can tell you all about the mountain you'll have to avoid.
    Envision, Energize, Enable

  14. #14
    elitist jerk daytonian's Avatar
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    I'd rather be a thin trim chiseled bike weenie than a fat, slow, softball playin/sportsbar drinkin/wifebeater jeanshorts mullet deekhead.
    I feel like a soiled kleenex dropped in the gutter in the red-light district of Paris.

  15. #15
    Elite Fred mollusk's Avatar
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    Ride a bike over age 16 = dork in the US. Embrace your inner dorkiness.
    I'm the world's forgotten boy. The one who's searchin', searchin' to destroy.

  16. #16
    Village Idiot
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    I wish I had grades like that!

    Organic chem and molecular bio classes are totally whooping my behind...

    Congrats on being a dork!
    Truth, like light, blinds. Falsehood, on the contrary, is a beautiful twilight that enhances every object.
    -Albert Camus

    Hammer Nutrition 15% discount!!!

  17. #17
    Killing Rabbits
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    Nomad, you're cool in my book. lol

  18. #18
    Trying to keep up ericcox's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Enthalpic View Post
    Nomad, you're cool in my book. lol
    so dorky he's cool? That's the only way I'd ever be considered cool

  19. #19
    Slow'n'Aero DrWJODonnell's Avatar
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    the real question is: What RPG??

  20. #20
    starting pistol means war YMCA's Avatar
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    40 is the new 30 as dork is the new _____ ???

  21. #21
    starting pistol means war YMCA's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DrWJODonnell View Post
    the real question is: What RPG??
    Dennis Rodman averaged 16 a game one season. Or is this another one of those dork questions flying over my head?

  22. #22
    Descends Like Avalanche HigherGround's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by NomadVW View Post
    Wanna fly into Thailand in May? I can tell you all about the mountain you'll have to avoid.
    Wouldn't you want to avoid all of them?
    The rider in my avatar is David Etxebarria, not me.

  23. #23
    Slowpoke csown's Avatar
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    Oh wise Nomad, pray tell how do you record Cycling.tv streams? I can only stream 400kbit comfortably and it looks like arse. Would love to record the 800kbit and watch it later when I've got it all.

  24. #24
    Trying to keep up ericcox's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by YMCA View Post
    Dennis Rodman averaged 16 a game one season. Or is this another one of those dork questions flying over my head?

  25. #25
    B(.)(.)BS badfishgood's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Enthalpic View Post
    Nomad, you're cool in my book. lol
    The coolest dork ever.
    Shallow genius, deep idiot.

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