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Old 06-10-14, 11:30 AM   #26
furiousferret
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Thanks, now you can carry on telling kids that Santa doesn't exist, and spurting out Game of Thrones spoilers.

I didn't think Mexico had an internet, who knew?
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Old 06-10-14, 11:44 AM   #27
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awesome
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Old 06-10-14, 12:18 PM   #28
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Thanks, now you can carry on telling kids that Santa doesn't exist, and spurting out Game of Thrones spoilers.

I didn't think Mexico had an internet, who knew?
I wanted to know more about the race since I knew very little about races in Mexico. Turns out the race has a webpage with a results section. Not exactly CIA-type stuff. I didn't sift through it, but they are there. Just wanted to give him a heads up if he was really trying to hide the other names.
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Old 06-10-14, 12:21 PM   #29
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I wanted to know more about the race since I knew very little about races in Mexico. Turns out the race has a webpage with a results section. Not exactly CIA-type stuff. I didn't sift through it, but they are there. Just wanted to give him a heads up if he was really trying to hide the other names.
yes but why spoil the mystery?
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Old 06-10-14, 12:23 PM   #30
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I wanted to know more about the race since I knew very little about races in Mexico. Turns out the race has a webpage with a results section. Not exactly CIA-type stuff. I didn't sift through it, but they are there. Just wanted to give him a heads up if he was really trying to hide the other names.
Sigh, now he's not going to finish the story...
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Old 06-10-14, 12:28 PM   #31
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Story should still be told. I just clicked the results section. They aren't listed. Mystery in-tact.
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Old 06-10-14, 10:24 PM   #32
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This is the kind of stuff that makes me want to post, and keep reading!
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Old 06-11-14, 09:56 AM   #33
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Old 06-11-14, 09:59 AM   #34
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This should have been titled

Fear and Loathing in Mazatlan: A Gonzo Vuelta
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Old 06-11-14, 10:40 AM   #35
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Chapter Three
Stage Two

“Can you see the numbers?”

“No”

“Stop here and let me out and I’ll run up”

“We need to pull off the road, traffic is backing up”

“We’re up next, they have 9 to go”

“****!”

“Just park in the construction lot”

“Tire pump! Where’s the tire pump?”

“Spare wheels?”

“Only ten speed, you’re on 11”

“****!”

"****!, ****!, ****!"

(Ride through dirt construction area, dodge oncoming traffic, bunny hop up curb, bunny hop down curb)

“I need to get my jersey from the promoter!”

“YOU NEED TO SIGN IN! Modelo tent!”

(Head shaking from official)

“Lo siento” (some of my Baja Spanish is coming back)

(Line up)

“Yamaha Honda se tapas de no ******. Degas de Devinchi numero siete no plumas Delgado Ramariez. Donde esta Iman!”

(Whistle blows)

Hogan attacks. El Chapo attacks. I attack, Francis counters. I sit up. Gap. El Negro bridges to Francis, they take off. After several attempts to bridge by Hogan and I that are covered and shut down, Francis is making gestures to the effect of “Hurry up!”

More attempts, more covering. It’s flippin hot and humid and I’m dripping sweat like Seattle rain. Shut down several breaks that look like they might have a chance, I’m sure Francis can win from a two man and want to keep him one-on-one, unless one of is there to chaperone. Get away with two guys at one point but they are disinclined to tow me up.

Francis wins by a minute and change, the guy he’s with moves up to 5[SUP]th[/SUP] on GC. Hogan wins the field sprint for third. I roll in 10[SUP]th[/SUP] after shutting down a last lap flyer. 1/3/10 for the team. Yellow jersey for Francis. Still 1/2/4 on GC.

We go back to the car and change. We have to stick around for the podium to get paid and we need to move the car. The town is next to a river perched on a hill with a street “plan” that obviously traced the path of a peyote eating mule deer. We eventually find our way to a street that takes us to an access point to the course. We show the Policia the bikes and he lets us through. Hogan hands him a cold drink on the way down.

We find a spot on the sidewalk to park. We are in the heart of hurricane country where the curbs are built to allow the streets to become deep rivers. Our first attempt up ends in loud noises and failure. As in life, momentum will overcome obstacles; our second attempt is successful, albeit with more noise than the first.

The next couple of hours are spent in the van running the air conditioning and watching the other races, with brief forays to the bathroom (banos) which are located where ever you can find a discreet place to go, the Porta Potty industry is in it's infancy here.

Podium done we follow some Mexican friends through town on a Mr. Toads ride through the back streets. Up, down, gravel, dirt, pull in the mirrors to squeeze through spots…at one point I’m thinking we’ll probably be stopped by masked gunman, removed from the car, and kidnapped for ransom.

Actually, not true. Despite the US press playing up the violent aspects of Mexico, I felt a lot safer there than many of the inner cities I’ve spent time in in the US. Or lived in for that matter.

Eventually we arrive at a “locals” seafood place. Table para diez por favor. Two giant plates of ceviche, a giant platter of tacos marlin and tacos camerones, several (actually many) buckets of Modelo Light (hey, we’re racers, got to watch those calories) and a purchase of a big bag of fruit empanadas later, we’re back on the road.

We give a ride back to Mazatlan to one of the pro “kids” who Hogan had lent his TT bike to the day before. In between discussions of the next day’s course (“very hard”) he gives us a dissertation on the local “talent” (not the racing type) of the various countries he’s visited.

If I was single, Argentinia might be on the top of my tourist visa pile.


Vuelta Ciclista Mazatlan- Stage Two
Circuit Race
Max Temp: 104
Finish: 10th
GC: 4th

Last edited by Racer Ex; 06-11-14 at 10:56 AM.
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Old 06-11-14, 12:30 PM   #36
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(Whistle blows)
Hogan attacks.

The rest of the field:
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Old 06-11-14, 01:35 PM   #37
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We find a spot on the sidewalk to park. We are in the heart of hurricane country where the curbs are built to allow the streets to become deep rivers. Our first attempt up ends in loud noises and failure. As in life, momentum will overcome obstacles; our second attempt is successful, albeit with more noise than the first.
Q. What's the difference between a 4x4 and a rental car?

A. A rental car can go anywhere.
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Old 06-16-14, 08:58 AM   #38
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Patiently awaits chapter 4....
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Old 06-16-14, 12:11 PM   #39
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Patiently awaits chapter 4....
Coming. May be a few days. Life stuff.
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Old 06-20-14, 05:57 PM   #40
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Coming. May be a few days. Life stuff.
I put my John Green book down expecting a literary triumph here. When I sign in, I want value. Harumph!
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Old 06-30-14, 09:19 AM   #41
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I'll take a shot doing a Sig Hansen on this...

I want my update and I want it now

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=chGftqpxk60
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Old 07-13-14, 08:33 AM   #42
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Hmm... Shades of Bobke.. :-)
subscribed, reading this amusing tale whilst listening to Rammstein.
It is somehow befitting..
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Old 07-14-14, 03:11 PM   #43
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(Whistle blows)

Hogan attacks. El Chapo attacks. I attack
A very late attack from Racer Ex. It must be the team tactic.
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Old 08-12-14, 01:15 PM   #44
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Coming. May be a few months. Life stuff.
ftfy
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