Originally Posted by Richard_Rides

But today, things are very different. Riding a bike is like a space shuttle launch. You must eat the right foods, put on your heart rate strap, put some cream on the bony parts of your butt, reset your GPS, lock onto 5 satellites, put on your special bike riding clothes, carefully inspect your bike and inflate the tires to the exact pressure you need, clean your chain, bring your cell phone, check the weather, carry enough water and energy food, plan your trip using sophisticated satellite mapping programs, put on your special shoes and make sure they're not too tight, put on your helmet and sunglasses, put on your gloves, carefully remove your carbon fiber bike from it's stand and roll it outside, clip your left foot into a pedal that costs more than your whole bike did as a kid, mount your bike and snap in your right foot, pedal a few feet, if no one's looking reach into your shorts and arrange your junk for maximum comfort, start pedaling and remember to keep your RPMs up, etc, etc...