When I got my first road bike, an older 87 Miyata, it had toe clip pedals and I hated them. So I found someone who had a pair of SPD pedals laying around and he gave me his shoes and cleats to go with. I to had a hard time getting them off, I dont know if it was the age of the pedals or the cleats, but I did not enjoy them. Not only that, but I hate I could not walk in them if my wife went riding with me (she likes to make stops and walk from time to time)
So I changed to crank brothers eggbeaters, which to my knowledge (correct me if I am wrong) uses its own type of cleat that can be bolted onto a 2 bolt SPD shoe.
I love these pedals, even though they are designed for a mountain bike, I clip in easy (and no matter what way the pedal is facing) and I get out just as easy.
I did experiance what you did with the SPD, and from what I was told it just takes practice. I just did not like the way they felt. (walking was number 2)
I have fallen only once, and it was in front of a bunch of people and I did get pointed and laughed at. But I have not let that deter me from riding with these pedals and shoes.
my suggestion is to go to your LBS and see if you can test out some pedal/cleat combos on a trainer to see what works best for you. That was what I did and I am glad I switched.