Consume food as usual but stay away from acidic drinks.
You'd be better off with Gatorade, which is also crap, but better than nothing.
If you want to really get basic, use a combination of Tums and pretzels. That'll work, too.
I was wondering if adding salt to my water bottles had merit. I'll try it.
Great stuff - keep the contradictory ,misinformation flowing. Extra points for ignoring situational context, the particular individual's size, age and training conditioning as well actual intensity of exercise. Assume your advice works perfectly for anyone, and of course any situation.