Ladies and gentlemen,
Welcome to the official "Admonish Chris L severely for his stupidity" thread. This is about my ride home from work this afternoon in light rain. I attempted to go through a gap that I knew full-well I had no chance of getting through. Of course, inevitably I realised that I had no chance of getting through it and had to slam on the brakes really hard.
This, of course, led to a skid which was admittedly made considerably worse by an oil-slick, but if I'd had any intelligence at all I would have anticipated it's presence before trying to pull of this stupid move (after all, we haven't had rain sufficient to wash any of these away for almost two years now). I am not using it as an excuse.
Somehow I managed to unclip from the pedals, jump off them and land on my feet before the bike actually fell in what must surely be the greatest fluke of all-time. Both self and bike escaped unhurt, which is a problem because I really deserve to be penalised for such blatant idiocy. As a consequence you are all free to admonish or abuse me in this thread as much as you like.
The whole situation would have been avoided with a little patience (or worse still, a little common sense). It is quite obvious that if brains were made of elastic I wouldn't have enough to go around a duck's ankles. To anyone who has ever read any opinions or advice from me on this forum, I apologise unreservedly for wasting your time with what has now been proven to be nothing but useless and distracting spam.