Erica

I was commuting to work. I turned on sixth street by the Amtrak station and this man came riding up beside me. He put out his hand for me to shake and said, "Hi, my name is James. What's yours?" I was a little weirded out because that is not normal for the bike community in Portland. This isn't New York City, you don't introduce yourself like that. I hesitantly put out my hand and told him my name.

"That's a pretty nice bike. How many speeds is it?"

"Seven."

"Where are you going?"

"To work."

"How fast do you normally ride?"

"Not that fast, I'm just going to work."

"Where are you going?"

By then I was really weirded out. I looked up at him, then down at the street. He had pushed me so close to the sidewalk I could have pedalled onto the curb. The bridge was coming up, there was a ramp onto the sidewalk. I turned onto the ramp and onto the sidewalk (I didn't want to be caught under the bridge with this guy). He turned his bike right in front of mine so I couldn't continue straight. I got off of my bike and stood behind it. By now I was really freaked out.

"Hi, my name is James. What's yours?

Again, I hesitantly put out my hand and said, "Erica." Firm grip. Too firm.

"NOW WHY IS IT THAT NO GIRLS IN THIS CITY WANT TO RIDE BIKES WITH ME? WHY IS IT THAT NO GIRLS WANT TO HAVE BREAKFAST WITH ME? WHY IS IT THAT NO GIRLS WANT TO GO TO MOVIES WITH ME?"

"I don't know," I said (totally scared at this point). He was standing so close. I bet he was on Meth.

"I DON'T KNOW IS NOT AN ACCEPTABLE ANSWER! WHY DON'T GIRLS TALK TO ME IN THIS CITY? ANSWER ME AND DON'T SAY I DON'T KNOW!"

"Sir, I don't know you. I don't know."

"I KNOW EXACTLY WHO YOU ARE."

"Sir. I don't know you."

"My name is James. What's yours?" (His eyes were as big as a deers by now.)

"Erica..."

"ANSWER ME. I DON'T KNOW IS NOT AN ANSWER. ANSWER ME IN FIVE SECONDS OR I'LL LET THE AIR OUT OF YOUR TIRES."

"I don't know you, I'm sorry."

"OKAY. My name is James. What's yours?"

"Erica." This time his handshake was so strong. I took my backpack off slowly and grabbed my phone out of my bag. I started to dial 911.

"OKAY I'M GOING TO GO THAT WAY [points north]. YOU DON'T GO THAT WAY. YOU GO THAT WAY [points south]. DON'T GO THAT WAY!"

Then he rides off. I talk to the dispatcher, they say a police officer will be there shortly. I started bawling. A nice man named Peter came and stood with me for a while. I was still hesitant to talk. The cops never showed. I ended up talking to an officer over the phone to make the report at almost five p.m. The incident happened a little after seven a.m.

This has urged me to start partner rides with other females at my work as well as making sure we all attend a self-defence class.

This world is full of crazy people. I just never want to go through that again. And I never want another female that I know to go through that. It would have been much different if it was night time and I went under that bridge for sure.

Please be careful out there.

Description: White male, mid to late 30's, 6'2"-ish, light brown hair, "chiseled" facial structure, older looking blue road bike with a rack on the back (items stored on it), wearing a hoodie or a baggy sweatshirt and slightly baggy pants. Name is "James."

Location:

jcm

Sorry for your experience, Erica. I'm a fit 225lb guy and I still carry a 23" telescoping baton. Personally, I don't put much stock in self defense classes for women. Fact is, most gals don't have the cajones (literally) to effectively defend themselves without using some kind of equalizer. Self defense is as much psychological as physical. You have to be willing to use overwelming force to initiate an escape or a victory.

Now, self defense awareness classes can be a good idea. There, you will possibly learn about some tools to apply. Situational awareness is the best defense, and you would probably get an ear-ful of that subject.

In our culture, we are enculcated with the idea that if we are nice, then bad things can be avoided. Especially girls. Sometimes it ain't so.

Males are strong. Even a male the same size and weight of a female will often be much stronger than the female. Testosterone makes this so. Our muscles and speed are tuned to maximum physical performance because of that strange chemical. Even when we're relatively out of shape.

You might consider carrying a can of pepper spray. A person with little or no training can effectively use it. Unlike a baton, it is a non-contact weapon and can give you some precious seconds to possibly shout for help or run into a nearby business, etc.

If this happens again, and a creep is as close as you say:
1) Get your hand on that pepper spray while you shout "BACK OFF, NOW!!"
2) Get distance between you and creepo. Don't show him the can of spray. Your hidden hand is intimidating.
3) Keep shouting. If creepo advances, hose 'im! You must soak the head/face area well.
4) Be prepared to run into a business or fight.

If you have to fight, you must win. A telescoping baton is a force multiplyer but you have to stike hard and repeatedly - not just once or twice. The arms, hands, head, face are the places it hurts the most. You have to be relentless and vicious. To understand how to stike effectively with a baton, I suggest trying to split a honeydew melon. Do it from different angles until you discover your maximum ability.

Good luck.

banerjek

There are many people with mental and chemical dependency issues. I think that if someone makes you uncomfortable, the first priority needs to be to get away. I think conflict, especially with the aid of a weapon (even if you are trained to use it), should be your last resort. Some people will pull really nasty tricks if you engage them -- there is serious risk of incurring permanent injury or even death.

Depending on circumstances, you can alter your route, outspeed whoever they are, enter a business, or even move right into the middle of traffic to get away.

One of the best things you can do to avoid bad situations (and get out of them) is to be aware of your surroundings and the opportunities/threats they present. If you do not have a helmet or glasses mounted mirror already, they are incredibly useful because you can watch behind you at any angle.

BTW, this is not just a women's issue. Creeps might bug women more often, but this kind of experience can happen to anyone.

chephy

mongoose stealthly approaches banerjek from behind and says in a low-pitched voice: "HELLO, MY NAME IS GIGI. WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO RIDE TO THE MOVIES WITH ME? ANSWER ME!!!! ANSWER ME NOW OR I WILL SPREAD YOUR BIKE FRAME!"

Seriously though, you're right, of course. Creepy things can happen to anyone.

Bockman

Wash that hand.

eubi

Sorry your first post to BF was to complain about this harrassment.

Hopefully a few women on this forum will read this and have suggestions.

Stick around here for a while. It's a nice crowd.

HoustonB

Sorry to hear about this. That end of town, from the river and within 5 blocks of Burnside is where almost all of the homeless congregate. I work just a few blocks away (2nd and Oak).

Just to clarify: This happened near NW 6th Ave and NW Irving St. And the bridge you would have gone under is the Broadway bridge approach road (NW Johnson St) at 7 AM.

ellenDSD

Sounds scary! Glad you are ok

CB HI

Good to hear this incident has not killed your love for cycling.

Group riding is one way to prevent such problems. Other ideas include stun gun (may not be legal in Portland/Oregon), move cell phone to where you can immediately get to it (911 calls scare these type of guys more than almost anything else - even if the cops don’t respond), pepper spray (buy 2 and practice with one before you have to use it - you need to put as much spray in the eyes as you can as quickly as possible and then take off), don’t ever offer your hand (can be used to pull you down or prevent escape). Remember, you never have to be nice to strangers.

You kept your cool when you needed to and did the right thing by calling 911. No one should ever have to face this type of situation, but you did good and hopefully that will give you confidence.

Roody

Here are a few tips for men and women:

Never get that close to anybody you don't know. Never let anybody you don't know touch you. Pretend that you are calm and in control. Firmly order the person to "BACK OFF!" If he doesn't, make a lot of angry (not frightened) noises as you get away.

Eatadonut

At the point where he raised his voice, you should be off your bike (it between you two) and have your hand on your pepper spray. You tell him he's making you uncomfortable, and he needs to leave. If he doesn't, you IMMEDIATELY get after him with the pepper spray, get on the bike, and bolt. If it looks like he's not responding to the pain (which he might not be, depending on the drugs), find an area with lots of people and dial 911 in the meantime.

At least, that's what I would do - I hesitate to use a baton or the like, because I hate to hurt someone who really means no harm. However, that's me, the large guy who can hold his own in a fight - You are in a different position, and might have a different plan of action.

I would definitely start with pepper spray, though. It works too well to ignore it. Angry and drugged people can fight through pain, it's far less likely they'll fight through eyes and skin that burn like hell.

CB HI

The thing is, this jerk would never approach one of us big guys.

Roody

The macho blowhards crawl out of the woodwork on threads like this. The advice to baton or pepper spray an obnoxious creep is obviously inappropriate, but I'm sure the OP is smart enough to ignore it.

However, Erica did make a mistake when she allowed this jerk to even approach and speak with her, let alone shake her hand. When strangers get within arm's length, you must back away, and you must TELL (not ask) them to keep away from them. Make a big noise, but, like I suggested before, sound angry rather than frightened. Back away. Order them repeatedly and angrily to leave you alone. NO matter what, never give anybody pernission to intimidate or harm you.

The main advantage you have is that you are smarter than him, and the cops and bystanders will want to help you, not him. Believe it or not, attacks like this are much more psychological than physical. You are not upset because he hurt your hand, you are upset because he scared you AND becaus he treated you like crap. Never let anybody treat you like that again, no matter who they are.

Eatadonut

The macho blowhards are right, and I don't think you can cow me out of this one.

I'll take an accusation of assault over being ***** or killed anyday. Drugees and ******* don't NEED your permission to harm you, they'll tear you apart whether or not you want them to.

Maybe I'm a blowhard, but you're naive.

Guest

Mistake #1. Don't let some dumbass ride up behind you and trap you into a conversation. Don't engage said dumbass in a conversation and give your personal details to the guy.

Mistake #2. Why are you still talking with him? Give him the incentive to move on, not to encourage him to continue riding next to you and harass you.

NEVER NEVER NEVER let a man edge you off the street or push you up against the curb- you're giving him all the control. Better to either speed up and try to outrun him and get to the nearest public place or find another cyclist that can help you. Or go to a sudden stop and and quickly turn around... count on your reflexes and him not being able to anticipate your sudden movements. And regardless of what people say about me being paranoid, I do always recommend every woman carry mace on them- either on a necklace around your neck or on a sweatband around your wrist- and if it's around your wrist, it has to be around the wrist of the weaker hand- so if you're left handed, the mace goes on the right wrist. If you're right handed, the mace goes around your left wrist. Then when you have to grab, you've got the mace in your dominant hand.

That was smart- standing behind the bike is a good way to protect yourself in case he advances on you.

No, no, NO! Again, never engage in conversation, and certainly dont let him touch you. Once he had his hand on your wrist, what's to say he couldn't drag you into the bushes?

Do not let anyone ever get that close to you ever. I like to have my "personal space". It's two arms' length. If anyone invades the "space", they're risking the loss of a limb or private part.

Ok, now he's threatening to get violent. Better for you to use sudden reflexes and jump on your bike and get away. Or flag down someone in a car... or someone on a bike. Something. And don't ever give out your personal information. There's no way I'd give out my name ever.

What??!! You let him touch you again? It's really lucky nothing happened to you.

That was smart. But this week, you'll want to head out to the mall and find a cell phone holder that attaches to your arm so you can get at your phone easily.

Next time cops don't show, call 911 and scream ****. Then call again and again until the cops come.

Smart move. Riding with another person might help you, especially if you're not going to carry mace (or some other kind of protection).
Be careful out there- and be aware of your surroundings and put together different scenarios and how you'd resolve them. That way, if some fool comes up towards you, you've already got your escape ready to go, and you will have the element of surprise with the potential scumbag. Every little bit helps you get one step farther away from the freak.

Sorry to hear about it, though. And I'm glad to hear you're ok.

Koffee

CB HI

The cops really helped here, did not even respond to the 911 call.

People really need to be ready to protect themselves, the cops normally only follow up after the serious crime has occurred. They rarely stop the assault, ****, shooting, robbery, etc.

Roody

Maybe blowhard was too strong a word, I apologize. But I'm not naive. I grew up in inner city Detroit and I still live and bike (often at night) in the rougher part of another Michigan city. I have worked with severely disturbed psychiatric inpatients for more than 25 years.

The simple truth is, after you get past the fear factor, this creep did not assault Erica. He did not even threaten to assault her. What did he do? He psychologically intimidated her and frightened her. He shamefully disrespected her humanity. However, strange as it seems, that is not against the law unless he actually uses coersion to attempt to commit a crime, such as robbery or sexual assault.

If Erica had used a strong arm tactic against him, she would have been escalating the situation. Spraying him or hitting almost certainly would have incited him to use violence. That would not have been good for Erica, as he likely would win in a physical fight, even if he had a face full of pepper spray.

Your best weapon when dealing with sombody like this is intelligence and especially self-control. Fear is his weapon, and that is what you must fight against.

Erica

The first mistake I made was telling him my name. I know that now. Between him first saying hi and me getting off of my bike and onto the sidewalk, only one minute had passed. Situations like this happen so fast and when you've never had to deal with something like that, you go with your gut. And my gut told me to just stay calm and try to end the conversation. I could have walked away but he was less than a foot away from me and I didn't want my back turned to him. I also could have yelled for help but I didn't think to do that at the time.

But really, there's no need to tear apart this situation. Coulda, woulda, shoulda. It happened and I will be more aware next time (hopefully there is not a next time though). I put this out here so that other females (and males!) would be aware before an unfortunate confrontation.

And people in Portland: I have already received other reports of this guy verbally assaulting females around the city. This is not an isolated situation. But unfortunately this is not breaking the law and he can not be arrested for it.

Thank you all for your concern and I do plan on sticking around these boards.

Erica

Precisely. If I had tried any sort of force I would have lost. It would have pushed the situation way beyond control. I'm interested in having pepper spray on me but I think that this certain situation it would not have helped at all.

chipcom 

Aww, I'm sorry that this had to happen and I am glad you are OK. I suspect he did not have all of his marbles in play from reading your post and, unfortunately, you come across people like that during your lifetime no matter what precautions, preperations or preventative steps you take. I think you handled it just fine...not perfect, but anytime you come home alive and well, you did OK. Learn from it and move on, living and enjoying your life.

Guest

And here's what you need to know- in a situation like this, YOU DO NEED TO TEAR APART THIS SITUATION. You already said you've never been in this situation and you didn't know what to do. By going through what you did wrong, you'll know what to do right if it ever happens again.

I'm glad you plan to stick around.

Koffee

banerjek

Note that this is one thing that mirrors are good for preventing. You can usually tell very easily whether someone's simply a fast rider or they're trying to catch up with you for some reason. If you think they're interested in you and you have any doubts, kick up the pace and go wherever you're going to go to avoid them. It's much easier to lose people when they're still a block behind you.

I think Koffee's advice is spot on except for the bit about the mace. Don't feel obligated to be nice to weirdos -- if you want to extricate yourself from an uncomfortable conversation, just say that you're late to an appointment, gotta run, take care, etc. Also, avoid telling them anything about your personal habits. You can appear to answer the question without giving useful info.

The reason I don't believe in weapons is that any halfwit will disable you before you get a chance to use it. I once got ambushed by 4 guys -- I took a blow to the head from behind and was on the ground before I even knew I was attacked. The sense of violation of getting stripped of what you have is incredible. When I figured out what was happening, I fought for everything I was worth. Even though I didn't give up until I was beaten so badly I couldn't move, I never had a chance. My main consolation was that the incompetent morons couldn't break my jaw even though they tried for awhile. I have no idea how many blows I took to the face.

Point being, I would have been worse off with a weapon. I would have have still been knocked down, they would have found it, and I could have been maced, tasered, batoned, stabbed etc instead of just being beaten and kicked. Plus, people can get cranky if you attempt to use a weapon on them and somehow fail.

Mycos

Move to Florida. Then you can just shoot people if they make you nervous.

CB HI

Typical BS article from the Washington Post where only the criminals are allowed to carry guns and shoot people. Ever wonder why Washington D.C. was the murder capital.

The Florida law allows proportional force in defending ones self, nothing more.

Recently in Hawaii, a meth attic for no reason tried to force his way into a couple’s apartment. The homeowner called 911 and the meth attic fled. The police came out, took a report and left. Shortly after, the meth attic returned, broke a window and reached in to try and open the front door. Again, the homeowner called 911 and the meth attic flees. The police come out and again take a report and leave. You would think the police might hang around in case this guys returns a third time - not in Honolulu. While the homeowner is outside sweeping up the broken glass, the meth attic returns, charges the couple, forces his way into the apartment and runs into the girl friend knocking her to the ground as the meth attic falls on top of her and will not get off her. The homeowner grabs 2 kitchen knives and stabs the meth attic. The meth attic dies in the apartment. The police arrive and arrest the homeowner for second degree murder.

The homeowner now has to pay an attorney, to try and get the second degree murder arrest expunged from his, otherwise, clean record.

I think I like Florida’s system better.

Eatadonut

He gave her a very threatening ultimatum in threatening to let the air out of her tires if she didn't respond. He yelled at her. He invaded her personal space. You can be arrested just for calling someone repeatedly when you know they don't want to hear from you, and you don't think it's wrong for someone to use superior size to intimidate someone? Besides, in this age of terrorism, he would most certainly be found in the wrong.

And I stand by my decision. If I feel that a situation might end up with me being harmed in some way, I will strike first, and I will strike hard. If you feel that the pepper spray wouldn't have stopped him and would have just escalated the matter, then maybe it's time to invest in a taser gun.