Cycling and bicycle discussion forums. 
   Click here to join our community Log in to access your Control Panel  


Go Back   > >

Advocacy & Safety Cyclists should expect and demand safe accommodation on every public road, just as do all other users. Discuss your bicycle advocacy and safety concerns here.

User Tag List

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 12-09-06, 12:01 PM   #1
TheKillerPenguin
Nonsense
Thread Starter
 
TheKillerPenguin's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Vagabond
Bikes: Affirmative
Posts: 12,314
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 88 Post(s)
I beat up a cager today.

So there I was, riding against traffic as usual, riding vehicularly, when some moron's mirror clips my shoulder as I'm going around a blind corner. The guy had the nerve to stop and yell at me for riding against traffic so rather than yell back I calmly explained to him how I was just following the rules and he should be more careful when he drives. At this point he called me a f'in moron and told me I was going to get myself killed. Whatever buddy, I was riding how the law tells me to ride

This was like the third incident this year, and I wasn't having it anymore. When he called me a moron, somethng just clicked inside of me. I pulled off my frame pump and bashed him in the face until he fell over, and when he was on the ground I peed on him. I also took all the money out of his wallet for pain and suffering. That'll teach that dirty cager to pay attention when he drives!
TheKillerPenguin is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-09-06, 12:08 PM   #2
unkchunk
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Ohio
Bikes:
Posts: 1,819
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
That'll teach that dirty cager to pay attention when he drives!
I see no reason to bring up someone's personal hygine practices. Whether a person chooses to bathe or not is their business.
unkchunk is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-09-06, 12:11 PM   #3
SingingSabre 
BF's Level 12 Wizard
 
SingingSabre's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Tucson, AZ
Bikes: Diamondback Sorrento turned Xtracycle commuter
Posts: 1,425
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
You were riding against traffic?

Oh, man. You're in the **** now...
__________________
Shameless plug (my sites):
Work
Photography
Vanity
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bklyn
Obviously, the guy's like a 12th level white wizard or something. His mere presence is a danger to mortals.
SingingSabre is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-09-06, 12:14 PM   #4
Lurker1999
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Boston
Bikes: Jamis Coda Sport '06
Posts: 548
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheKillerPenguin
So there I was, riding against traffic as usual, riding vehicularly, when some moron's mirror clips my shoulder as I'm going around a blind corner. The guy had the nerve to stop and yell at me for riding against traffic so rather than yell back I calmly explained to him how I was just following the rules and he should be more careful when he drives. At this point he called me a f'in moron and told me I was going to get myself killed. Whatever buddy, I was riding how the law tells me to ride

This was like the third incident this year, and I wasn't having it anymore. When he called me a moron, somethng just clicked inside of me. I pulled off my frame pump and bashed him in the face until he fell over, and when he was on the ground I peed on him. I also took all the money out of his wallet for pain and suffering. That'll teach that dirty cager to pay attention when he drives!
Excellent. Now you've posted something admissable in court if you're ever involved in an accident where the other party's attorney needs to find something incriminating about your state of mind at the time of the accident or assault/battery.
Lurker1999 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-09-06, 12:15 PM   #5
Cyclaholic
CRIKEY!!!!!!!
 
Cyclaholic's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Sydney, Australia
Bikes: several
Posts: 4,269
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 70 Post(s)
Ask R600DuraAce for a few pointers and try again
__________________
There are 10 types of people in the world - the ones that can count in base 2, the ones that can't count in base 2, and the ones that didn't expect this to be in base 3.
Cyclaholic is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-09-06, 12:17 PM   #6
N_C
Banned.
 
N_C's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Bannation, forever.
Bikes:
Posts: 2,887
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Ok this has got to be satire. Nice.
N_C is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-09-06, 12:21 PM   #7
BroMax
The Other White Meat
 
BroMax's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Reno
Bikes: Raleigh Sports 3 speed, Torker T-530
Posts: 605
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Of course the driver was an insensitive boob and got what he deserved. I hope he was unconscious when you peed on him because some people like to get peed on. You didn't damage your tire pump I hope.

PS Unkchunk is right about the "dirty" remark. It was out of place, even if it was made during a time of stress, just like Mel Gibson and that other guy.
BroMax is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-09-06, 12:21 PM   #8
TheKillerPenguin
Nonsense
Thread Starter
 
TheKillerPenguin's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Vagabond
Bikes: Affirmative
Posts: 12,314
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 88 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lurker1999
Excellent. Now you've posted something admissable in court if you're ever involved in an accident where the other party's attorney needs to find something incriminating about your state of mind at the time of the accident or assault/battery.
yeah yeah yeah, whatever. The cager was clearly in the wrong.

Isn't anybody going to ask me how much money I scored off the guy?
TheKillerPenguin is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-09-06, 12:22 PM   #9
brokenrobot
Sweetened with Splenda
 
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Brooklyn, Alabama
Bikes: Too many 80s roadbikes!
Posts: 2,335
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cyclaholic
Ask R600DuraAce for a few pointers and try again

Oh, I don't know... he got a couple - that's not SO bad.
brokenrobot is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-09-06, 12:24 PM   #10
Bikepacker67
Banned
 
Bikepacker67's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Ogopogo's shoreline
Bikes: LHT, Kona Smoke
Posts: 4,086
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Hey, it's Penguin Troll...

how ya been?
Bikepacker67 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-09-06, 12:25 PM   #11
I-Like-To-Bike
Been Around Awhile
 
I-Like-To-Bike's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Burlington Iowa
Bikes: Vaterland and Ragazzi
Posts: 23,732
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 6 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cyclaholic
Ask R600DuraAce for a few pointers and try again
I bet that evil tub o'lard "cager" was coming from Walmart and going to McDonald's for super sized deep fried cholesterol burger, while calling into Radio Rush L. on a cell phone and was driving a big butt SUV. Just like all the other evil "cagers". Thank goodness a Real Cyclist was around to dispense a mild version of street justice. But you shoulda been carrying some duct tape, bungee cords, and matches so he could have been strung up, dangled and burned like all the other cager vermin, eh?
I-Like-To-Bike is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-09-06, 12:27 PM   #12
I-Like-To-Bike
Been Around Awhile
 
I-Like-To-Bike's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Burlington Iowa
Bikes: Vaterland and Ragazzi
Posts: 23,732
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 6 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by N_C
Ok this has got to be satire. Nice.
Ya think?
I-Like-To-Bike is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-09-06, 12:29 PM   #13
TheKillerPenguin
Nonsense
Thread Starter
 
TheKillerPenguin's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Vagabond
Bikes: Affirmative
Posts: 12,314
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 88 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by I-Like-To-Bike
I bet that evil tub o'lard "cager" was coming from Walmart and going to McDonald's for super sized deep fried cholesterol burger, while calling into Radio Rush L. on a cell phone and was driving a big butt SUV. Just like all the other evil "cagers". Thank goodness a Real Cyclist was around to dispense a mild version of street justice. But you shoulda been carrying some duct tape, bungee cords, and matches so he could have been strung up, dangled and burned like all the other cager vermin, eh?
well, i figured when i said cager it implied what you said. Duh, people.
TheKillerPenguin is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-09-06, 12:32 PM   #14
I-Like-To-Bike
Been Around Awhile
 
I-Like-To-Bike's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Burlington Iowa
Bikes: Vaterland and Ragazzi
Posts: 23,732
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 6 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheKillerPenguin
well, i figured when i said cager it implied what you said. Duh, people.
Yeah, you seen one "cager" you seen 'em all. No good MF'ers should all be...; eh?
I-Like-To-Bike is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-09-06, 12:33 PM   #15
Wogster
Senior Member
 
Wogster's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Toronto (again) Ontario, Canada
Bikes: Norco Bushpilot (out of commission), Raleigh Delta
Posts: 6,941
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheKillerPenguin
So there I was, riding against traffic as usual, riding vehicularly, when some moron's mirror clips my shoulder as I'm going around a blind corner. The guy had the nerve to stop and yell at me for riding against traffic so rather than yell back I calmly explained to him how I was just following the rules and he should be more careful when he drives. At this point he called me a f'in moron and told me I was going to get myself killed. Whatever buddy, I was riding how the law tells me to ride

This was like the third incident this year, and I wasn't having it anymore. When he called me a moron, somethng just clicked inside of me. I pulled off my frame pump and bashed him in the face until he fell over, and when he was on the ground I peed on him. I also took all the money out of his wallet for pain and suffering. That'll teach that dirty cager to pay attention when he drives!
The law most places states you ride with traffic, not against traffic, as you state above, I even underlined it for you. The driver was right, you are going to get yourself killed, and for telling you so, you beat and defiled him, he was right you are a moron, and an idiot as well.
Wogster is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-09-06, 12:34 PM   #16
Bekologist
totally louche
 
Bekologist's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: A land that time forgot
Bikes: the ever shifting stable loaded with comfortable road bikes and city and winter bikes
Posts: 18,025
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
i think the trolling penguins' first sentence gives it all away.

Go play in traffic, little man.
Bekologist is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-09-06, 12:38 PM   #17
rover
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Harrisburg, PA
Bikes: 198? Raleigh Technium
Posts: 83
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I'm hoping you got his address from his wallet and are now subtly playing mind games with his entire family. If not this whole thing just sounds like the beginning of a bad Clive Owen movie.
rover is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-09-06, 12:38 PM   #18
The Rob
Almost Immortal
 
The Rob's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Portland, Oregon
Bikes: 2004 Trek 7500FX
Posts: 820
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Uh-Oh...

Um, Wogsterca...it really was a joke post, man. Back away from the keyboard, shake it out, deep breaths.

__________________
"Ignorance begets confidence more frequently than does knowledge." -Charles Darwin


http://blog.myspace.com/robcatg

http://therob.wordpress.com
The Rob is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-09-06, 12:40 PM   #19
I-Like-To-Bike
Been Around Awhile
 
I-Like-To-Bike's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Burlington Iowa
Bikes: Vaterland and Ragazzi
Posts: 23,732
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 6 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wogsterca
The law most places states you ride with traffic, not against traffic, as you state above, I even underlined it for you. The driver was right, you are going to get yourself killed, and for telling you so, you beat and defiled him, he was right you are a moron, and an idiot as well.
Law? Law? We don't need no stinkin' law! Open season on all "cagers" at all times; yeah! That's why God invented the U-Lock and bike pump.
I-Like-To-Bike is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-09-06, 12:44 PM   #20
slagjumper
Senior Member
 
slagjumper's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Down on East End Avenue.
Bikes: Salsa Las Cruces, Burley R&R and a boat load of others.
Posts: 1,816
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Something like that happened to me last year, only I was blowing through a stop sign. When the filthy cager skidded abruptly. The skid was so loud that I could hear it through my custom molded, silicone-ear-canal head phones! Then the guy had the audacity to call me a sub-idiot and said, something like, "..almost evolution in process", then he got out of his car. That was his mistake. While he turned to tell off his wife who just told him, "Henry don't make a fuss", I seized the opportunity to whack at the old guy’s head with my pump. His head was so hard that the pump shattered into several pieces! I guess that I should have filed a police report for the damage to my pump. I tell you what--hey don't make pumps like they used to. Next time I'll have a better pump.

Last edited by slagjumper; 12-09-06 at 12:49 PM.
slagjumper is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-09-06, 01:01 PM   #21
San Rensho 
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Bikes:
Posts: 5,547
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 18 Post(s)
I have a modest proposal, lets just eat all the cagers, that will solve the problem.
__________________
Il faut de l'audace, encore de l'audace, toujours de l'audace

1980 3Rensho-- 1975 Raleigh Sprite 3spd
1990s Raleigh M20 MTB--2007 Windsor Hour (track)
1988 Ducati 750 F1
San Rensho is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-09-06, 01:16 PM   #22
N_C
Banned.
 
N_C's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Bannation, forever.
Bikes:
Posts: 2,887
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wogsterca
The law most places states you ride with traffic, not against traffic, as you state above, I even underlined it for you. The driver was right, you are going to get yourself killed, and for telling you so, you beat and defiled him, he was right you are a moron, and an idiot as well.
And here I thought I had a problem understanding what is satire & what isn't. Note I emphasized the word satire.
N_C is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-09-06, 01:17 PM   #23
N_C
Banned.
 
N_C's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Bannation, forever.
Bikes:
Posts: 2,887
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
This thread is useless with out pics.
N_C is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-09-06, 01:38 PM   #24
Bikepacker67
Banned
 
Bikepacker67's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Ogopogo's shoreline
Bikes: LHT, Kona Smoke
Posts: 4,086
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by N_C
This thread is useless with out pics.
Bikepacker67 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-09-06, 02:14 PM   #25
2manybikes
Dog is my co-pilot
 
2manybikes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Bikes: 2 many
Posts: 15,559
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 52 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by chipcom
There is only one thing to do when da killer penguin comes a trollin...

Excellent!
2manybikes is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off



All times are GMT -6. The time now is 06:49 PM.