harleyfrog

There's a story in today's Biloxi Sun-Herald about a female cyclist reporting a drive by flashing.

Remember to be careful out there, folks. You never know what might happen.

Pedaleur

That was more than a flashing. That man is dangerous.

harleyfrog

^^^^^ Agreed.

mconlonx

Cyclist reported motorist to police; police followed up. Woah. That is news.

donnamb 

It's never happened to me, but I know women who've experienced this. I know it might not seem so, but it's really terrible and scary, especially when you can't easily flee.

CommuterRun

This is when you turn it around by pointing, and laughingly say, " Hey, that looks like a penis... only smaller ."

Guys like this deserve to be crushed.

randya

yeah, but do men ever report women who flash them?

zeytoun

Fortunately for women, male flashers aren't normally *******... but I'm trying to figure out why there is such a huge perceptual gulf between a male reaction and a female reaction.

It's not sex drive. It might be societal. It might have something to do with men's larger stature, but that's just a generality. Or maybe it's just physiological. If women had something wrinkly to stick in us men, we might not be so pleased at the implication of one waved at us... then again... we might...

trackhub

I didn't, when it happened to me. I was riding past the Jackson Homestead, on Washington street in Newton, MA. A Camaro (but of course) full of teenaged females zooms by. The young woman in the passenger seat was half-way out the window, holding her top up, revealing her, uh,, gifts. They all let out with a bit "Whhhooooo!".

Okay, so I was caught off-guard for a few seconds. Well, I did what any male would have done: I tried my best to catch up. Nah, no reason to report this. Still, one must wonder what her parents would have thought of this.

On a more serious note, this guy does sound dangerous.

feba

There are things women could put in men. And waving them around might not get you imprisoned, but it would scare the hell out of some guys.

harleyfrog

Most likely if they did, their wife/girl friend would give them an atomic dope slap upside the head.

zeytoun

Like kitchen utensils?

buzzman

thought this was going to be a funny thread but just read the article and it creeped me out. glad for the sake of that cyclist, and others, they caught him. It would be enough to stop someone from riding if they thought he was still out there.


are you actually asking why women respond negatively when a strange man exposes himself to her?

If so, the murder, **** and abuse rate in the world might be a clue.

The incident Trackhub described, while a little stupid and naive on the part of the female "flasher", is relatively harmless, not terribly "threatening" and, dare I say it, somewhat "titillating". It's a completely different situation in my eyes- and it happened right in my neighborhood and doesn't creep me out at all.

The guy in the article has an obvious "problem" and acts out in a criminal anti-social fashion. Basically, he's a nutcase. To have reported the female "flasher" would have been way overboard IMHO. The cyclist who reported this guy did us all a favor.

zeytoun

While I appreciate your effort to highlight the seriousness of sexual assault and violence against women, I was trying to discuss reasons for different reactions without resorting to cliche.

We react to perceptions of danger, not necessarily the facts. Women are much more likely to be sexually assaulted by someone she knows, not a stranger exposing himself. And yet women often report long-term trauma after seeing a man expose himself. This probably has little to do with statistics. Am I not allowed to discuss the topic? Or have we already figured out human sexuality 100%?

In fact, much of the statistics are distorted or misrepresented. **** estimates (1 in 3, or 1 in 4) are usually based on surveys that include attempted **** and morning after regrets in the total.
Another example would be domestic violence. Men are equally likely to be victims of violence at the hands of their female partners, including serious injury.

This is not to minimize the real abuse that happens here, and in other parts of the world. Every case of abuse should be taken very seriously. Misinformation, though, prevents us from understanding the realities, and fighting them. And it often causes us to shut down discussions, in a chivalric sense of moral indignance.

We know, even as cyclists, how much media overreports some things and ignores other. Real abuse of women around the world is pretty much ignored, while the media was busy creating the image of the "man in the bushes".

buzzman

not meaning to oversimplify the issue, nor to shut down your response, as I think you're genuinely posing the question and I am legitimately trying to address it, but I think you've got the answer right there. Whether it's someone they know or not is irrelevant to the incident in the article.

and the OP was about an anonymous stranger exposing himself- not someone she knew. Given that the suspect had a criminal record that included prior assaults I'd say the female cyclist's reaction was a pretty good judgement call and not based on media bias, misinformation or a distortion of facts or statistics.

There was nothing in the article that I read indicating that the woman suffered "long term trauma" from the incident. For all we know she reported the incident and got on with her life.

If anything most reports of sexual assault are underreported. I'm not a sociologist nor a statistician but some of the things in your post seem unlikely- ie. "Men are equally likely to be victims of violence at the hands of their female partners, including serious injury." By all accounts from reliable sources that I have found on the web women are victims of such abuse 85% to 15% and suffer much more debilitating injuries. I did find some sites that I might call "angry male sites" that would dispute those figures but they seemed to have more of an axe to grind than any interest in real statistical accuracy.

Would you have reacted any differently than the female cyclist had the same guy flashed you? I would have done the same thing she did- called the cops and reported him.

zeytoun

I never commented specifically on the reaction of the person in the article. Whether or not I would have reported would have depended on the specific circumstances (I've been flashed by men and women before and know that the circumstances and discomfort can vary greatly), and I certainly don't question her decision to report it. I was merely having conversation about reaction to such a situation in more philosophical/abstract terms. My point about being traumatized was to point out that while women are more likely to be sexually assaulted by someone they know than a stranger, women in general report trauma at seeing someone expose themself fairly often when it's a stranger, and very rarely when it's an partner...

The fact is, there is much debate on the matter, and a lot of myths from every source. But getting to the point, knowledge of a statistic (true or false) isn't necessarily the sole cause (or even a big factor) of a person's reaction to a situation. Personal experience as a victim would be a huge factor, no doubt. Social conditioning, no doubt. News stories, maybe. I'm sorry for offending you.

buzzman

No offense taken.

I guess I wasn't making sense of your comments because they were less pertinent and specific to the particular incident in the article and more in general with regards to how people observe and respond to such events and sexual abuse. Taken in that context some of your points are clearer to me.


Statistically there are far fewer female cyclists than male and I am sure one of the factors that reduces the number of women interested in the sport is the potential for harassment they might receive when on a ride. Male on male aggression is frequent enough but I don't think it's a myth that women are more likely to be a target of a wide range of harassment.

Stating that "men are abused by their spouses to an equal degree as women" and that "flashers seldom ****" would not go far with the women in my life if some guy had just flashed them while out on a bike ride- just letting you know- and that's a fact not a myth.

CB HI

YES, on BF.

feba

Come to think of it, I think a woman holding anything could be scary depending on her mood and facial expression.

slvoid

Women respond differently because they're on the receiving end.

adriel

See, if he had run her over he wouldn't even have gotten a ticket, show some nudity and he is in jail.

I am not defending his actions, but the inequality of it all makes my head spin.

zeytoun

Not always ;-)