I hate bike thieves... I have untold desires on how to handle the guy who would have the balls to steal my steed (castration being among the least of them). Today, however, I read about one that I'd have to pray for...
Bike Thief Leaves Handwritten Apology Note, Plus $10 for New Lock
I hope this guy can get straightened out, and everybody will take his post script to heart.
P.S. Please buy a U-lock