Singlespeed & Fixed Gear - STREET NINJA TRIX: #2 - HOWTO Make Bike Porn

With the success of our last our last STREET NINJA TRIX (http://www.bikeforums.net/showthread.php?t=105190), I have descended from the shadows to present #2. HOWTO Make Bike Porn.

1. Clean your bike.
2. Spray some cologne on it. (Preferably something made by a washed up celebrity. see: J.Low, Britney Spears)
3. Ride to a city center. Be sure to keep your headgear and katana nearby. This helps other bikers identify you.
4. Get ready for the photo spread!

As you can see below, these four steps will help you take on the likes of Mr. Jeremy.


http://www.brandonchalk.com/images/2way.jpg
Nice lighting. Notice the BLING EFFECT from the rims. The "rear mount."

http://www.brandonchalk.com/images/3way.jpg
HARDCORE! This isn't your HBO Red Shoe Diaries crud. Triple header.

Hot!

That's some incestuous yellow on yellow action.

Great, now I need to explain the birds & the bees to my cat who witnessed that vile act. What has the internet come to?!?!?!

*deletes cookies*

I like the hot BSDM outfit on the yellow bike in the second photo ...

Mmm ... tight rubber ...





I feel dirty now.

can't do none of that without

http://www.parktool.com/images/tools/PPL_2.jpg

Now I'm all hot and bothered *blush*

There is another bike in the background sticking its a$$ out at the the group.

can't do none of that without

http://www.parktool.com/images/tools/PPL_2.jpg

hahahah.....I forgot to take prep shots! You know, the money shots.

i'm really glad that the diameter of most bike tubing is smaller than the diameter of.. well.. you know.

*deletes cookies*

man. i was gonna eat those.

i'm really glad that the diameter of most bike tubing is smaller than the diameter of.. well.. you know.

hmm...don't know...enlighten us ;)

i'm really glad that the diameter of most bike tubing is smaller than the diameter of.. well.. you know.

You speak like a man of, ahem, experience. My bike fetish is only to fend of ninjas and pirates.

this thread is hot

you should leave the backpack out of the shot next time. makes it seem like low budget bike porn. :p

No protection...Do I hear the pitter-patter of mini-fixies in the near future? I think so.

i'm really glad that the diameter of most bike tubing is smaller than the diameter of.. well.. you know.

some less fortunate guys do not have the problem of which you speak... :(

WHats up with that bike in the background in that first picture? A little vouyer action going on, too, huh? hehe

Wierd drop outs on the yellow bike.

Wierd drop outs on the yellow bike.

Nah nah, you're just looking at them the wrong way.

Nah nah, you're just looking at them the wrong way.


I was. I'm a fool.

OK you people.

When I was a kid, we used to take our bikes and make "the milk machine". Let me see, we used to take one bike, take the chain, and hook it up to another bike, then put the rear wheel of another one next to that rear wheel, and you turn the pedals on one, they all turn. All bikes inverted, standing on their seats/handlebars. I wish I had a picture, that would have been the one justification worth getting my "Checkers and Pogo" camera. We were crazy kids, I never knew we were pervs.

you should leave the backpack out of the shot next time. makes it seem like low budget bike porn. :p

we didn't want to get pegged as posengeur porn makers. you know, a messenger bag adds +10 scene points. an extra 5 if it's custom!

You speak like a man of, ahem, experience. My bike fetish is only to fend of ninjas and pirates.

ahem back.. i think turd is female.. but wtf she might have experience.. true?

and btw do you have to do it in front of my cityhall.. i mean i know peeps that got married in there.

No protection...Do I hear the pitter-patter of mini-fixies in the near future? I think so.
The Viner has protection...look at the front wheel, in front of the fork. It knows when to stop.

StinkyO's - who owns the Viner? Nice looking ride.

']The Viner has protection...look at the front wheel, in front of the fork. It knows when to stop.

StinkyO's - who owns the Viner? Nice looking ride.

i forgot his name. i just know he rides for de grønne bude here in copenhagen. the other yellow biker is from a deadline cat. but the protection doesn't work. it's all for show.



ahem back.. i think turd is female.. but wtf she might have experience.. true?

and btw do you have to do it in front of my cityhall.. i mean i know peeps that got married in there.

it's bike porn exhibitionism at it's finest. i just though city hall added a nice backdrop for the deep plot. with same sex marriages being legal i thought it would be nice to present these photos since i think rasmussen will allow bike marriages next.