General Cycling Discussion - Cycling and trying to date

Hi all,

How many of you have experienced embarrassment or problems when trying to date while maintaining your love of bicycles?

I've always loved cycling but for the past 10 months I've also deceded to go car free. Personally, this lifestyle has suited me perfectly as a single guy who left a 4 year relationship only a year ago. I cycle to work, to the pub, into town as well as take my new road bike out on rec rides.

Trouble is I've recently become friendly with a girl and we're about to go on our first proper date. First thing she asked me on the phone was "So when you picking me up?". I admit I felt really embarrassed at that moment and stumbled out that I'd borrow my parents car to take her to the date.

She then replied "So what kind of car do YOU have?". When I told her I didn't have a car I detected a change in her attitude and tone, like she thought this was quite strange.

Perhaps she has a point. Could it be considered selfish or dropping out of society to ditch the car for bikes? Sometimes I feel that although my passion for bikes is great it can also be enterpreted as a social statement.

What are other people's views on this? How have you managed your love life without a car?

Find a girl that says, "would it bother you if I rode my bike to dinner instead?". :)

i'm lucky. not having a car is the norm in new york city.

i guess you just have to find a way to mention it as early on as possible. probably before you even get her number. but it's too late for that... good luck and let us know what happens.

If she really likes you then not having a car won't matter. I'm by no means a Don Juan kind of guy, but I've have success meeting ladies that don't care about me being car-free. Of course there have been some women that thought I was a loser or something, but that just made me realize that they were not the lady for me.

Get yourself a tandem. Ladies love the tandem. ;)

Let her know WHY you do not have a car. There are far too many guys out there who are barely making ends meet and are hoping sponge of some woman. You worry that she will think you are strange. This is worth worrying about. She may decide you are strange, too strange for her. BUT it is far worse for her to think you are broke and nearly a deadbeat.

If you are good at it you might even be able to sell the idea that you realized having a car was simply a waste of money with your current CHOSEN life style, and that this is good because it shows you are financially responsible.

Of course this is assuming you are making a decent living. If you really are barely paying the rent then you do have a problem.

Kiss those ladies good bye; your bike is your partner now, and there is no going back now!

I'm not broke at all, it really is a lifestyle choice due to my current circumstances. I realise that when I do finally get hitched again then a car will be higher priority, but at the moment I have no desire to buy one just to accomodate a few dates.

Get yourself a tandem. Ladies love the tandem. ;)

Really? Can't imagine something worse than staring at someone's back and having him set the pace all the time.

Besides I have a better sense of direction than most guys I know. So why have them leading the way?

What you say is: "My parole officer says it will be five to ten years before I can drive again. Hey, if you got twenty bucks and a car, we could go see a movie".


If she STILL wants to go on a date with you...be very, very careful.

If you showed up on my doorstep with a tandem I'd slap you and call off the date. Unless I was feeling sadistic. Then I'd sit on the back and not pedal the whole time.

No, you say: "My parole officer says it will be five to ten years before I can drive again. Hey if you got an electric toothbrush and a nail file, I'll get us a car and into a movie".

Honestly, did you hide this from her or something? I'd just get everything women find superficial out first.
"Hi, I don't have a car, I ride my bike everywhere, I have enough stamina to do it with you for 10 straight hours provided I have enough powergels and you survive, the place I'm taking you out to is decent and mid-range, I have a normal job, I make an average salary, but I'm sincere, I'll care about you more than anyone in the world, and I won't share our bedroom pictures with anyone else."

If you showed up on my doorstep with a tandem I'd slap you and call off the date. Unless I was feeling sadistic. Then I'd sit on the back and not pedal the whole time.

That's horrible.. poor guy's gonna have to drag your fat a$$ around the whole night...

Seriously though, I wouldn't recommend showing up with a tandem either. I mean, not many people like one of these fanatical car-free give up every automobile related luxury in life just so I can say I bike everywhere kind of life styles.

Trouble is I've recently become friendly with a girl and we're about to go on our first proper date. First thing she asked me on the phone was "So when you picking me up?". I admit I felt really embarrassed at that moment and stumbled out that I'd borrow my parents car to take her to the date.

She then replied "So what kind of car do YOU have?". When I told her I didn't have a car I detected a change in her attitude and tone, like she thought this was quite strange.



Have her drive to your home and then you guys can walk to a nearby bar or coffehouse. Or you meet her at the bar or coffeehouse. Cheap dates. You can pay for her drink at the coffehouse. Or you two can rotate buying rounds of drinks at the bar. Save the dinner and movies when you have a girlfriend.

You don't seem to have any problems at all. You don't own a car and all its troubles and problems, but you have access to a car. Best of both worlds. She doesn't have to know that you're driving your parents car.

She says: So when you picking me up?
You say: What? I thought you were picking me up.

She says: What kind of car do you drive?
You say: It doesn't matter because you're picking me up.

dating question? OP's location is the highlands. insert obligatory sheep joke here.

sorry man, i really can't help you - i'm pretty much a hermit. but that said, if you having a car is make-or-break for the relationship - she's not worth it.

so yeah, make it clear that you've made a lifestyle choice and why. f**k "society's" preconceptions. i own two cars. love 'em. but that's my choice.

plus, you can always point out the sexy bod isn't free. make sure she knows you are cycling to make her happy.

If you showed up on my doorstep with a tandem I'd slap you and call off the date. Unless I was feeling sadistic. Then I'd sit on the back and not pedal the whole time.


If you weren't pedaling behind me, then I would give you a nice whiff of what I ate for lunch. I would continue farting and going around the block then drop you off and tell you I had to go home and reorganize my sock and underwear drawer.

Peace.

That's horrible.. poor guy's gonna have to drag your fat a$$ around the whole night...
Your ass is over 30 lbs heavier than mine!

If you weren't pedaling behind me, then I would give you a nice whiff of what I ate for lunch. I would continue farting and going around the block then drop you off and tell you I had to go home and reorganize my sock and underwear drawer.
I would never get on the back. I steer or I slap your sorry ass with my purse the whole time. Only possible exception is if I've seen a guy on a motorcycle multiple times and I KNOW he's a competent rider. Then I might consider the back seat.

Your ass is over 30 lbs heavier than mine!

Yeah but it's all muscle.

I would never get on the back. I steer or I slap your sorry ass with my purse the whole time. Only possible exception is if I've seen a guy on a motorcycle multiple times and I KNOW he's a competent rider. Then I might consider the back seat.


My bike, my rules.

You gotta pay top dollar to slap my ass.

She says: So when you picking me up?
You say: What? I thought you were picking me up.

She says: What kind of car do you drive?
You say: It doesn't matter because you're picking me up.
that is the the greatest line ever, thank you.

Yeah but it's all muscle.
Banquet chicken pot pies are not muscle building food. You are a good liar though.

My bike, my rules.

You gotta pay top dollar to slap my ass.
No, you'd have to buy me an EXPENSIVE dinner to get me sit on the back seat and slap your ass.

It's not banquet, maybe the cheap crap you buy but this is boston market!


Banquet chicken pot pies are not muscle building food. You are a god liar though.

It's not banquet, maybe the cheap crap you buy but this is boston market!
but it's still got like a zillion calories. Only difference is those are more expensive and taste a little different.

I prefer lean gourmet.

Get yourself a tandem. Ladies love the tandem. ;)

That what the guy who wound up going home with her.. thought too.... http://static.flickr.com/14/14274225_cb29eddd3b_o.jpg







she's a keeper

How many of you have experienced embarrassment or problems when trying to date while maintaining your love of bicycles? Not sure what the scene is like over there, but where I am, people don't really "date" anymore. Way, way too serious. We do "hang out" a lot though. :) Personally, I would be more discriminating if I was you and only go out with athletic chics who have no problems with riding bikes. I called up one that I met at a party a while back and enticed her with a story of the perfect sunrise I caught up on top of the hill. Our first "date" ended up being this 50-mile ride:

http://www.gururacing.com/cycling/SanMarcosGibraltar/SB-Aerial2.jpg

I could swear she was wearing make-up and I don't think she broke a sweat the whole time. :)

I could swear she was wearing make-up and I don't think she broke a sweat the whole time. :)

and how did she go on the bike ride? ;)

Hey! We talking about your azz or this guy's dating problems?
I say ask her if she likes riding bikes, and then take her out on a long ride with you and explain to her your whole philosophy.

Car ownership is not mandatory. If I could get around without owning a car, I would be more than happy. I used not to own one and I did not have a problem having dates. If a woman is measuring you that harshly from the get go better steer clear from her.
Your lifestyle choices, and perhaps your particular financial situation, makes you car free. Find a person with similar interest and steer clear of car centric people.

She then replied "So what kind of car do YOU have?"

Dump her.