Living Car Free - Dear Abby: I don't drive

Back when the car free forum first started, I seem to remember threads about people constantly being asked if they needed rides, questioned about why they didn't drive, etc.

I don't usually read "Dear Abby" but this morning, for some reason it caught my eye. I figured this would be of interest to the inhabitants of this forum.



DEAR ABBY: It's a well-known fact that I don't drive. However, no matter where I go, people ask me how I got there. I am a very private person and resent people asking me that question. I would like a good answer. Thank you. FRAN IN BUFFALO, NY.

DEAR FRAN: Smile and say, "The stork brought me."

So she flew in?

Sometimes people are just curious. I usually give them a straight answer and then they go on to something else.

i threaten them with physical harm. then they never talk to me again. problem solved. :p

yeah, i say i rode. then if they start asking me why, that's when it gets annoying. i think it was you, timhaan, who said "because my legs aren't broken yet" or something? that's a good one.

I always tell them the roads are safer when I'm not driving on them! :D

Koffee

The person who wrote this question to Dear Abby didn't want to tell the truth. It's not that he's a private person at all. He does not like this question asked because others around him will either feel sorry for him not being able to afford a motorcar. If the event ends up late at night, others will feel the need to drive this poor soul home. It's all part of the negative stigma those who are car free have to go through.

...if they start asking me why, that's when it gets annoying...

One answer is "I just like it better that way." Irrefutable yet nicely non-threatening.

One answer is "I just like it better that way." Irrefutable yet nicely non-threatening.

The non-threatening part is sadly sometimes needed. I have a really good friend who told me the other night (he was very serious too) that I am very good at making people feel guilty and it's not cool :lol: I never preach it and only volunteer that I am car-free if asked...

Some people just dont like to hear that you don't drive

One answer is "I just like it better that way." Irrefutable yet nicely non-threatening.


that's a good line. one phrase i use a lot is "i'm not interested". said politely and directly it's a great way to finalize conversations that turn into coercion, or cease conversations that go to far (big things and little things)

i.e.:

so you don't ever want kids??? why not?? me: "i'm not really interested"

oh you can go with us to such event. me: "oh i appreciate it a ton, but i'm not really interested"

I'm not really car free since we own a family car.
However, I never use it and commute using a bike.

At the beginning of the commute I constantly received "do you need a ride? I can pick you up"
The thought is nice and all but after the 50th time it gets old. My response is always "Thank you but I like to ride" and occasionally I add "You don't want to see me when I do not ride in".

Parking my bike in an empty cube rather than the cafeteria has also helped.