Singlespeed & Fixed Gear - messenger related rant

Bikeforums.net is a forum about nothing but bikes. Our community can help you find information about hard-to-find and localized information like bicycle tours, specialties like where in your area to have your recumbent bike serviced, or what are the best bicycle tires and seats for the activities you use your bike for.
melikebike
02-25-06, 02:53 AM
tonight, me and two of my other mess. friends strolled into a party, mess. bags in tow and what not. well apparently a former messenger there(2yrsvelocity) thought that we walked in the place like we owned it and procedeed to talking sh#t for the rest of the night. after a "man to man" talk with him, he only continued to believe that we were trying to be cool cuz the messenger image is cool, and was a total buzz kill. man i didnt think that these kind of people actually existed, but they do.
You should have.....
a. challenged him to a ride off (like in quicksilver with that little montage of all the guys busting tricks
b. given him the official messenger handshake
c. ask to see his messenger decoder ring
actually option C would be the jam. I want one, I'll make one for you out of foil too if you want
melikebike
02-25-06, 03:18 AM
dang, my first instinct was to challenge him to a ride off, but there were no other bikes locked up outside before i got there, and his pants were not rolled up. aka he probably didnt ride there
humancongereel
02-25-06, 03:19 AM
ha ha ha...the ring thing is great.
seriously, though...if people like that don't follow me around being jerks, i find i have a much more pleasant evening if i just pretend i told them to bugger off and then stay away from the rest of the night. keep away from the negative vibes or aura or...hell, you know what i mean. stay away from people that'll piss me off and ruin the night.
shankton
02-25-06, 06:49 AM
tonight, me and two of my other mess. friends strolled into a party, mess. bags in tow and what not. well apparently a former messenger there(2yrsvelocity) thought that we walked in the place like we owned it and procedeed to talking sh#t for the rest of the night. after a "man to man" talk with him, he only continued to believe that we were trying to be cool cuz the messenger image is cool, and was a total buzz kill. man i didnt think that these kind of people actually existed, but they do.
Damn, the same thing happens to me when I stroll into a party with my plumber's tool bag in tow and what not, because the plumber image is mega-cool. When some AH talks sh*t to me, I just cave his skull in with a 24 inch pipe wrench.
huhenio
02-25-06, 06:54 AM
/\/\/\/\
you made my morning
Rikardi151
02-25-06, 06:56 AM
chortle
mattface
02-25-06, 07:11 AM
Damn, the same thing happens to me when I stroll into a party with my plumber's tool bag in tow and what not, because the plumber image is mega-cool. When some AH talks sh*t to me, I just cave his skull in with a 24 inch pipe wrench.
You plumbers think you are SOOOOOO cool... flashing your crack to the world.
I made the mistake one night of bragging to a girl about how nice my ass is. She then decided she wanted a nice look n' grab. I was embarassed because I realized my pants and underwear were already hanging halfway off. The good news: She concurred, I have a nice ass. The bad news: I still went home alone.
I'm not even a plumber! I just make bad decisions when I drink.
Ira in Chi
02-25-06, 07:21 AM
Damn, the same thing happens to me when I stroll into a party with my plumber's tool bag in tow and what not, because the plumber image is mega-cool. When some AH talks sh*t to me, I just cave his skull in with a 24 inch pipe wrench.
This is why I don't invite plumbers to my parties. They show up with thier macho plumber bs, drink all of my beer, agressively hit on any female guests, leave their tools laying all over the dancefloor, and by the end of the night one of 'em will be wasted and trying to dissasemble the trap on my bathroom sink. Plumbers may come off as cool, but they are really a bunch of lowlife scum!
Ira in Chi
02-25-06, 07:25 AM
The glamorization of plumbers is PLAYED OUT!
http://earlyonemorning.com/graphics/plumber.jpg
shankton
02-25-06, 07:31 AM
This is why I don't invite plumbers to my parties. They show up with thier macho plumber bs, drink all of my beer, agressively hit on any female guests, leave their tools laying all over the dancefloor, and by the end of the night one of 'em will be wasted and trying to dissasemble the trap on my bathroom sink. Plumbers may come off as cool, but they are really a bunch of lowlife scum!
Next time your toilet is clogged up, good luck getting one of us to help. Call a bike messenger.
SamHouston
02-25-06, 07:33 AM
I made the mistake one night of bragging to a girl about how nice my ass is. She then decided she wanted a nice look n' grab. I was embarassed because I realized my pants and underwear were already hanging halfway off. The good news: She concurred, I have a nice ass. The bad news: I still went home alone.
I'm not even a plumber! I just make bad decisions when I drink.
Can't be giving it away like that, once she knows then the mystery is gone, gotta keep her guessing til she REALLY wants to know. Doesn't hurt to keep a plug wrench or a tube bender just visible in your messenger bag, you don't say you're a plumber, but with tools and crack showing...maybe she's getting lucky
Prime example of the good natured, stupid humor that this forum needs to get back to. No need to be knocking people to have a good time! Unless you're a plumber.
Thanks Sam, that's good advice. I'll try to keep it in mind next time I'm in that situation. A crack without any mystery, is just a crack. Need to maintain that air of mystery, it's what it's all about.
Ira in Chi
02-25-06, 07:43 AM
Next time your toilet is clogged up, good luck getting one of us to help. Call a bike messenger.
You sound like a pose-lumber to me!
shankton
02-25-06, 07:55 AM
There have been a number of unkind references to plumbers crack in this thread. It is discouraging that a$$crack is what plumbers are primarily known for.
Remember that plumbers have an emormous responsibility to face every day. Not only do we safeguard the health of the nation by ensuring that clean water comes up and dirty water goes down, we also have to share the burden of ultracool hipness with bike messengers.
the pope
02-25-06, 07:59 AM
You sound like a pose-lumber to me!
bwaaaaaaaaa! good zinger.
shankton
02-25-06, 08:01 AM
I am as DONE as Don Walker.
You should all go and clean the hair out of your p-traps.
mattface
02-25-06, 08:21 AM
There have been a number of unkind references to plumbers crack in this thread. It is discouraging that a$$crack is what plumbers are primarily known for.
Plumbers are known for ass cracks like messengers are known for messenger bags. It's a sort of a trademark of the profession, but ANYONE can sport one.
the homealien
02-25-06, 08:34 AM
The last time I went to a plumber party I got some 'tude cause I ran a front and back belt on my multi-pocket pants.
Ira in Chi
02-25-06, 08:35 AM
Remember that plumbers have an emormous responsibility to face every day. Not only do we safeguard the health of the nation by ensuring that clean water comes up and dirty water goes down, we also have to share the burden of ultracool hipness with bike messengers.
Sure, that's why you became a plumber- it didn't have anything to do with the recent popularity of plumbers in urban youth culture? I remember a time when you didn't see teenagers walking around Wicker Park with a Roto-rooter over their shoulder!
melikebike
02-25-06, 09:49 AM
:D :fight: :beer: man a plumb-off, er a race-off would have shown him.
raygunner
02-25-06, 09:51 AM
tonight, me and two of my other mess. friends strolled into a party, mess. bags in tow and what not. well apparently a former messenger there(2yrsvelocity) thought that we walked in the place like we owned it and procedeed to talking sh#t for the rest of the night. after a "man to man" talk with him, he only continued to believe that we were trying to be cool cuz the messenger image is cool, and was a total buzz kill. man i didnt think that these kind of people actually existed, but they do.
What kinda of bike did he ride?
Did you have a better bike than him? That's the only issue here!
melikebike
02-25-06, 09:55 AM
good question, i think the mere presence of my bike totally crushed his non existent(or not present) bike, btw i was riding my surly pacer(backup rain bike) cuz my sweet schwinn conversion was put out of commision earlier that night at critical mass
raygunner
02-25-06, 10:02 AM
good question, i think the mere presence of my bike totally crushed his non existent(or not present) bike, btw i was riding my surly pacer(backup rain bike) cuz my sweet schwinn conversion was put out of commision earlier that night at critical mass
Surly es muy bueno!
kennethalan
02-25-06, 10:50 AM
Sometimes I rock the plumbers crack while ALSO wearing my messenger bag. I am a super Posengerumber.
jmgorman
02-25-06, 03:45 PM
So does that mean all those fat girls in the low rise pants are just posing on the plumbin scene?
"better bike than him?"
what does this mean?? for partying or for plumbing? or...
spider-man
02-25-06, 04:59 PM
Hey, anyone got advice on a plumber's belt? Must come in pink. Also, any advice on upgrading my Drain Buster plunger?
the pope
02-25-06, 05:03 PM
Hey, anyone got advice on a plumber's belt? Must come in pink. Also, any advice on upgrading my Drain Buster plunger?
Look in the ARCHIVES man
shankton
02-25-06, 08:53 PM
Hey, anyone got advice on a plumber's belt? Must come in pink. Also, any advice on upgrading my Drain Buster plunger?
A plumber's belt can be any color as long as it is worn low enough to allow plenty of beer gut overhang. As far as the plunger goes, no need to upgrade it. Just use it like a f***in man.
a winter beater plunger is always good to have around, but i wouldn't trust anything less than an njs approved drain snake for the big jobs...
shankton
02-25-06, 09:26 PM
a winter beater plunger is always good to have around, but i wouldn't trust anything less than an njs approved drain snake for the big jobs...
The njs snake is only for use when the toilet is clogged with a combination of maxipads and empty beer cans.
Powered by vBulletin® Version 4.1.12 Copyright © 2013 vBulletin Solutions, Inc. All rights reserved.