Living Car Free - Reactions to your car-free lifestyle?

edit - title fixed, thanks Juha. :beer:

Since going car-free a few weeks ago I've since had many negative reactions and treatment ............ initially that is. My parents strongly objected (yeah, I'm 32 but parents will always be parents) and my brothers were pretty casual about it. Parents, it was a safety concern, well intentioned. Friends and co-workers were a mixed reaction. I had some that were quite supportive and interested in my new car-free lifestyle and would ask the same sorts of questions I had when I first joined here. How will you get to work in the rain, the cold, the heat, etc etc? How about grocery shopping or just shopping in general? The most asked was quite simply why?

After answering the many questions and getting to see my bike and knowing full well I had thought this decision out pretty thoroughly most of the negative comments and laughter, yes there was quite a bit of laughter at my expense dissipated. :p Still, some of my friends and co-workers, very few mind you just don't treat me the same. :( They look at me as though I failed some how in the game of life. They like many attach success & happiness to what people drive. Believe me I soon found out quickly with those people that bicycles are the bottom of the "success food-chain".

After 2 weeks of commuting and living car-free the once laughter at the site of me pulling up on my bike has pretty much disappeared. Now they ask me how was my ride and smile when they ask. A few co-workers have told me that I've inspired them to dust off their bikes and ride. One even took his bike out of his garage after 4 years and told me he rode to his mothers home 4 miles a way and back. Yet another started riding again and is looking to get his family into biking as well.

I realise that not everyone will understand or support my decision but it still blows wind that those few I've known for years treat me in a negative way. The flip side are those that have taken up biking again and credit me for their renewed interest. :) Oh well, such is life I suppose. I just never knew how much people view what you drive as to how successful you are until the past 2 weeks.

How do your family, friends & co-workers react to your car-free life?

I realise that not everyone will understand or support my decision but it still blows wind that those few I've known for years treat me in a negative way. The flip side are those that have taken up biking again and credit me for their renewed interest. :)Now you know who your friends are. :)

Hey, getting some real friends interested in dusting off their bikes and losing some fake friends-- that's a win-win!

I've gotten reactions that range from words of admiration, to complete disgust. I’ve found that 90% of people react with complete amazement that one would chose to go without a car, and that one could go without a car and maintain a functional lifestyle.


They look at me as though I failed some how in the game of life. They like many attach success & happiness to what people drive.

Even when I've owned and loved my cars, I’ve never equated driving with success, and not driving with failure. It would be interesting to compare the "success" in life of drivers who think this way, to that of a happy-car-free individual. I’m not sure if people look at me this way, but I’ve reached a point in life where I really don’t care anyway.

I got alot of oo's and ah's from people. Alot of safety warnings come with the team coaches and family members. It can be a drag for friends that transport me places. Or even parents. Its hard on them when they want me to grocery shop and transport younger siblings. I also have gotten 4-5 people out on the road bike at school. Its a group at school now, the cycling group. I'm quite happy about the way I live.

i'm going through a divorce and will be giving up the car (and its payments, insurance, etc.) in the process. i feel good about this, not because i don't think i'll ever own a car again, but because for now it will free up money for bikes and give me a good excuse to spend money that way.

Don't get me wrong, I don't regret my decision one bit. In fact I wish I had done this years ago. :D I just didn't expect such an adverse reaction from certain people. I guess It's kind of hard to explain living an auto-free life to people willing to drop 5K on rims for an automobile while going into more debt in the process. :rolleyes:

If you care what people think, or if you rely on people thinking well of you for whatever reason, giving up a car in mainstream America is a bad idea. If you couldn't care what they think...well, who cares?

Except during college, I've always lived in cities where a lot of people dont have cars. People who want to judge you superficially can find plenty of other things by which to evaluate you, such as clothes, mannerisms, ipod, cell phone, etc.

Here's an idea to regain some of that lost status: with all the money you're saving from being car-free, why not carry around a thick roll of hundreds. WHen people are condescending to you, stuff one in their pocket, give them a light slap on the cheek, and say "get outa here."

Here's an idea to regain some of that lost status: with all the money you're saving from being car-free, why not carry around a thick roll of hundreds. WHen people are condescending to you, stuff one in their pocket, give them a light slap on the cheek, and say "get outa here."

:p

I'm not broken up about it, it's was just very surprising to see how some people reacted.

After four years of riding everywhere, most people just accept it. But still, on a real snowy or rainy night, co-workers sometimes say, "You didn't ride your bike today, did you?"

I just smile and say, "Yes, thank God. I'd hate to be driving on a night like this!"

i'm going through a divorce and will be giving up the car (and its payments, insurance, etc.) in the process. i feel good about this, not because i don't think i'll ever own a car again, but because for now it will free up money for bikes and give me a good excuse to spend money that way.

I could've typed the exact same thing. Good luck!

(The divorce is final on May 12, 2006.)


Chris

edit - Argghhhhhhhhh, you can't edit titles. :p Was meant to read "your car-free lifestyle".Fixed. :beer:


How do your family, friends & co-workers react to your car-free life?
Around here it's not such a big deal. I have several friends who are car-free to an extent. I used to get weird smiles when I chose to bike 100kms to a friend's summer cottage when they invited people there for the weekend. Now they're used to it. A co-worker may still comment on a day when weather is especially foul, but more in a matter-of-fact sort of way. They know I'll bike to work anyways, they're not questioning my sanity or anything. Just pointing out today was not particularly favorable for bike commuting. Sometimes they're even correct about that, go figure...

People I have contact with seem to realise they really cannot make very far-reaching conclusions about me based solely on my chosen mode of transportation.

--J (a Forum Mod)

Some people will always find that someone else deciding to devate from a norm that they ascribe to is a challenge to them personally. By going car free, they'll see you as saying that they are doing something that is unnessecary and amplifying the background stigma of vehicles that most people are aware of but chose not to acknowledge.

Some of them will react badly by trying to turn this against you, not because they genuinely beleive you to be a social failure but because they aren't fully secure in their own convictions about cars. Alas it is far easier to point the finger at someone else than consider moving out of their comfort zone.

Fortunately some people will react positively to the challenge and try something new.

Most people think I'm nuts for doing "impossible" things like cycling 30 mins to get to a meeting, or loading 50lbs of photo equipment into my trailer. Then again most people think I'm nuts anyway, why not give them one more reason?

Thanks Juha :)



Most people think I'm nuts for doing "impossible" things like cycling 30 mins to get to a meeting, or loading 50lbs of photo equipment into my trailer. Then again most people think I'm nuts anyway, why not give them one more reason?


Well said, a good portion of my friends & co-workers already thought I was nuts and have stated this wasn't really out of the norm for me. I guess it's time to convert those few that may believe I still have some sanity left. :D

Let 'em laugh; I'm laughing all the way to the bank.

Most people think I'm nuts for doing "impossible" things like cycling 30 mins to get to a meeting, or loading 50lbs of photo equipment into my trailer. Then again most people think I'm nuts anyway, why not give them one more reason?

I'm somewhat suprised that Canadians, especially those from Ottawa, would react this way to your cycling. I thought they would be more elightened than us 'mericans!

Some people where I work at are actually envious of me being car-free. They wish they could do that.

I'm somewhat suprised that Canadians, especially those from Ottawa, would react this way to your cycling. I thought they would be more elightened than us 'mericans!

Some people where I work at are actually envious of me being car-free. They wish they could do that.

It's not cycling as such that raises eyebrows - far too common here to be commented on - but other things off most people's radar. They know bikes exist, but for them 30 mins. of exercise sounds impossible, or at least a lot of work, so it sounds amazing to cycle "that far" routinely. Same thing goes for the cargo trailer - the concept of carrying more stuff by bike than fits in a backpack is a new concept to many, they can't imagine it. Even winter cycling - hardly unusual here - surprises many people. Most non-cyclists in Ottawa know bikes exist and are used to seeing fleets of bikes out three seasons per year, but don't have much knowledge about what you can really do with a bike.

As to being car-free, I actually know a lot of car-free people, but most of them live and work downtown - for them it's not a statement, they just have no need to bother with a car.

Even when I've owned and loved my cars, I’ve never equated driving with success, and not driving with failure. It would be interesting to compare the "success" in life of drivers who think this way, to that of a happy-car-free individual. I’m not sure if people look at me this way, but I’ve reached a point in life where I really don’t care anyway.

The problem there is the subjective definition of success. I consider myself to be successful - I only gross about $10K a year, rent a small, cheap apartment, don't drive, etc - but I'm happy. Many people would not consider me to be at all successful. If you don't care how people look at you/what they think about you, I'd say you're successful too - regardless of what you do, how much money you make, where you live etc.

hey patc...nice to see another commuter hauling photo equipment :) i'm a photographer in Long Beach, CA sans car and I get the strangest looks when I'm pulling my BOB or BurleyFlatbed. you'd think people have just seen an alien. it is, afterall, southern CA, the heart of "you are what you drive" culture...

when i tell people I'm carfree they usually ask if I've had one too many DUI violations...when i tell them I'm a photographer, they tell me I'm crazy....

i think the most I've ever pulled by bike is a norman 200 kit, 2 light stands, 2 pairs of folding scrims, 2 softboxes, tripod, umbrellas, pelican case with 2 nikon bodies and six lenses and other accoutrements...the combo that gets the most looks is when i pull out a 4x5 camera, box of polaroid 55 and a small cooler to process the negatives in...fun stuff :)

my photo sites are here:

www.russroca.com
www.xcapekey.com

hey patc...nice to see another commuter hauling photo equipment :) i'm a photographer in Long Beach, CA sans car and I get the strangest looks when I'm pulling my BOB or BurleyFlatbed. you'd think people have just seen an alien. it is, afterall, southern CA, the heart of "you are what you drive" culture...

I had a client a while ago who spent every free minute of a 90 min. photo shoot saying, "I can't believe you biked here with that!"

Most photographers can't believe that its possible to have a mobile studio kit that weights less than 60lbs. I shoot only digital SLR, so the whole camera kit is about 20lbs at most - including two bodies and the Quantum battery (I miss working with 4x5, bu don't miss the cost, chemistry, or bulk). My studio kit was purchased to be light and portable - even if that meant paying a bit more for 4 section stands that collapse smaller, etc. I can carry the two light kit, backdrop, and camera bag in one trip and walk with it for several blocks. If for some reason I can't or don't want to use the bike trailer, I can carry the lot on the bus. Some people are so used to "the way things are" that they can't think outside the box.

I'll have a look at your sites, mine is on my signature below.

edit After answering the many questions and getting to see my bike and knowing full well I had thought this decision out pretty thoroughly most of the negative comments and laughter, yes there was quite a bit of laughter at my expense dissipated. :p Still, some of my friends and co-workers, very few mind you just don't treat me the same. :( They look at me as though I failed some how in the game of life. They like many attach success & happiness to what people drive. Believe me I soon found out quickly with those people that bicycles are the bottom of the "success food-chain".


That's what happened to me.

The comments were just too much and now that I take the light rail instead of commuting by bicycle, I'm considered normal again. If I should ever start bike commuting again, I'll make sure never to tell anyone because those comments will return again. I'm glad you were stronger than me!

I remember these women who sit next to me really felt sorry for my situation. I could tell by the expression on their faces that I was pitiful in their eyes. It was totally condescending as someone said.

They know I'll bike to work anyways, they're not questioning my sanity or anything.

hehehe! I've come to the conclusion that the ppl here stoped questioning my sanity as well. Only now they KNOW i'm insane. But I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every seconds of it. :)

I think it's funny seeing ppl's reactions over time. I would often pull into the small covered bike rack where all the ppl smoke when winter was aproaching, and everytime the weather would worsen a bit, ppl would be incredulous that i'm still on the bike, and all expecting that I would soon be off. After all, you can't bike all winter in their own minds.

One time this winter there was a 45cm (17.7 inches) accumulation of snow, and someone saw me pulling in to the bike rack, and he was trully flabergasted (half the office didn't drive into work that morning, some spent 4 hours in traffic). The word spread like wildfire into the office, and for weeks ppl would stop me and ask me "are you the crazy dude who biked into that snowstorm".

Funny though, ppl stoped talking about it after that. If i'd been through that, they could no longer imagine anything would stop me. :)

My neighbor asked me about car free living last month. Sincere questions, not the derisive type. She just got a folding bike and gave her car away.

One time this winter there was a 45cm (17.7 inches) accumulation of snow, and someone saw me pulling in to the bike rack, and he was trully flabergasted (half the office didn't drive into work that morning, some spent 4 hours in traffic). The word spread like wildfire into the office, and for weeks ppl would stop me and ask me "are you the crazy dude who biked into that snowstorm".

Funny though, after that ppl stoped talking about it after that. If i'd been through that, they could no longer imagine anything would stop me. :)

I bet you have a whole new level of respect both from your co-workers and management after that snow storm. :beer:

I just didn't expect such an adverse reaction from certain people.

Yer rattling their cage, challenging their values. You're a threat. If you don't have an SUV, they may be next....:eek:

Keep it up.:D

I bet you have a whole new level of respect both from your co-workers and management after that snow storm. :beer:
The same thing happens to me, I come in to work on time on my bike when the SUV drivers are making snow excuses. Except I haven't noticed the respect. Once I overheard one of the bosses shaming an employee who claimed he couldn't get in because of snow by telling him that I got in on a bike.

I think its helps to think of the Netherlands and other places where people bike and its not a big deal. Hell, once you start riding and doing your own thing, you don't care anyways.

The same thing happens to me, I come in to work on time on my bike when the SUV drivers are making snow excuses. Except I haven't noticed the respect. Once I overheard one of the bosses shaming an employee who claimed he couldn't get in because of snow by telling him that I got in on a bike.

Funny how many people think the only way to get around in bad weather is in the car. When I was at university, I used to walk all the time and I remember around exam time one year we had really heavy rain for several weeks with all the flooding that causes. Funny thing was, all the people who drove were asking for special consideration because they had missed an exam due to traffic problems caused by flooding. Me, I kept walking and never missed an exam - got pretty wet a number of times, but that just gave me an excuse to fill up with hot chocolate when I got home. :D

Actually, even though I ride all year, in the really really bad snowstorms I have walked instead. Since I work in a hospital, my efforts are appreciated when at least one worker from the previous shift gets to go home. (We're not allowed to punch out until we're relieved.)

So there are times when I start to think about walking if I have to go someplace important like work. Like when the snow gets high enough that the pedals are scraping in it, I can't see 6 feet in front of my bike, and the snowplows are terrorizing the streets.

Of course, if it's my day off, those same "bad" conditions can turn good and make for some pretty fun rides! :)

After four years of riding everywhere, most people just accept it. But still, on a real snowy or rainy night, co-workers sometimes say, "You didn't ride your bike today, did you?"

I just smile and say, "Yes, thank God. I'd hate to be driving on a night like this!"

Can I borrow this line from you? Hilarious!
"Yes, thank God. I'd hate to be driving on a night like this!"

Being car free (mostly) has actually made me pretty popular. people are always talking to me about it and everyone knows me as "that kid who rides his bike everywhere".
Everyone at the grocery store knows me because of it. It's a great conversation starter.
Almost every ride I get a few people I know who honk or wave from their cars.

I can really only think of a few people who look down on me for it. Most respect me for it.

Being car free (mostly) has actually made me pretty popular. people are always talking to me about it and everyone knows me as "that kid who rides his bike everywhere".
Everyone at the grocery store knows me because of it. It's a great conversation starter.
Almost every ride I get a few people I know who honk or wave from their cars.

I can really only think of a few people who look down on me for it. Most respect me for it.
I would hope that some of them would learn from your example. Keep up the good work!

juha. 100 kms commute is not so tough. Would not think twice about that . particularily not a tough assignment when flat like much of Scandavia is.? To become more committed to a partially car free life style; do have to adopt to foul weather riding. One reason for living in Roussillon or California.
I do not like all that leaky clothing, wet feet, and loss of traction while on the bike. I shall try to overcome that. One car, might have to in order to be mobile.

Car has not moved since Saturday. Got my wife in for a training ride Saturday. By training, I mean new to cycling- like staying upright when taking off. BUt, anyway. Picked up enough groceries on the way back, that the panniers on two bikes were full.... But, to demonstrate my committment to trying to be car free. If the items needed require a car, I ask myself do I really need this stuff.. This weekend we went without.
Here you have to plan accordingly. Stores are the opposite of Farmer Jack being open all night. Even major stores close two hours for lunch. Never open on Sunday. Close at 7 pm sharp. and there are no 7-11's...Should you need milk for the baby at 9 pm you are out of luck.
so, early am rides to closest mini Proxi's are necessary if you want your cereal not to be dry.
the motivation is not to necessarily save gas, but driving to the super market is not as fun as taking the bike.

This is a great thread in my mind.... I love all your posts on this subject.


After four years of riding everywhere, most people just accept it. But still, on a real snowy or rainy night, co-workers sometimes say, "You didn't ride your bike today, did you?"
I just smile and say, "Yes, thank God. I'd hate to be driving on a night like this!"

Roody, I never get tired of that question, I actually feed off of it! I will ride an anything. The worse the weather, the more I am in Bliss. Sanity for that matter, I have none. I am addicted to throwing myself off anything possible. I love big hit riding as much as I love the pavment, I am the all around "do-it-all" rider.
Cyclecross is my next venture, among many others but its in the works.
I love bieng a complete loon. Makes me have flutter-butters in my stomach.

I'm constantly checking the weather and planning..bad weather..more interesting the solution. My in-laws think i'm nuts but i'm not the one stuck in the house when the weathers bad..i've noticed they're always asking if i can stop here or pick this or that up..

I love the challange of bad weather riding, did my first snowstorm this winter to the train station...i was laughing as i slid sideways down to the bike rack in a foot of snow, cars actually started following me since they thought i had an easier path through the snow..wrong.. since bike wheels are bigger it was just easier for me to get through the snow..just have to watch out for cars spinning out in front of me, if i slide out in the snow i just leap back on..if a car does it can kill someone or wreck the vehicle/property..

Heywood, you definitely know the dirty little secret of carfree biking in the winter:


It's Fun As Hell!

Well, speaking of riding in adverse weather, I've got a question I'll slip in here rather than start a whole new thread. (I'll also go look around the fixie/ss forum.) I building a stripped down single-speed, gonna slap some fenders on it and will probably mostly use it when it's raining or has rained (which actually isn't often or much here), then next winter for snow. But what kind of tires are best for that? Slicks?

I could've typed the exact same thing. Good luck!

(The divorce is final on May 12, 2006.)


Chris

I got divorced 3 years ago. I use my bike for 90% of my travel. My son (7) lives on the other side of town so I use the car for picking him up and school events etc.
When he's with me the car is parked. My son and I BOTH get around by bike :D

I live in a small town but my pickup is part of my job. So I don't live car free and probably never will. You just can't do it in the part of the country where I live.

Nobody laughs when they see me out on my road bike 10 miles from town. But around town, just riding for fun, they think you're goofy. Yesterday it rained and I still went out for a road ride.

When I get in my wife is making sandwiches, there are no tomatoes, and the grocery store is four blocks away. I've already showered up, but I slip on my cycling rain suit and pedal to the store on my mountain bike without fenders, get the tomatoes and come back home. Ten minutes tops.

Today I have two people tell me I'm goofy for being in the rain.

Who cares? When we were kids we loved to play in the rain. Now I get to ride in it.

I'm glad to have stumbled across this forum. I'm new to bike commuting, but I've been car-free (and carefree) since 1998. Two things happened: 1) they effectively doubled the bus fares for city dwellers, and 2) a friend dropped dead of a heart attack at 52 (I'm 49). So I bought a bike. Now I'm kicking myself that I didn't do it years ago.

The wrench at the LBS was dumbfounded when I showed up last Monday for the free 30-day service on the 30th day. He said, "You know, we mean 30 *riding* days." I thought a moment and replied, "Well, I can't leave it on Wednesday."

Over the years, reactions have been mostly gaping mouthed incredulousness. Many then wish they could do the same. I tell them they can and they come up with lame excuses about why they can't.

One time, I was told that not owning a car is un-American. I looked around, then up (for the black helicopters) and whispered, "Shhh! If the gubbamint also finds out I don't have a credit card (I use debit cards), and don't own a television, a cell phone or an air conditioner, they'll revoke my passport." As the saying goes, he didn't know whether to s*** or go blind.

In the past year, the only time I've begged a ride was to that friend's funeral. It wasn't on a bus line and I didn't own the bike yet. Even if I'd had the bike, showing up at a funeral in bike clothes, or biking in funeral clothes wouldn't have felt right. (Although I could have kept up with the funeral procession afterwards.)

Purchases I can't carry I have delivered. Even most car owners would have a new mattress or new freezer delivered. I buy most everything else online and have UPS deliver it. It's not hard. In fact, it's easier than driving to the mall and dealing with all that crap.

Admittedly, going from a bus to a bike is easier than going from a car to a bike. I already have the car-free stuff down. What I wasn't prepared for was the additional freedom the bike gives me. I'm no longer restricted to bus routes and schedules. It's taken some time to get used thinking about alternate routes and paying attention to traffic. The only other change I've had to make so far is my pharmacy. No bike rack and no signs, rails or posts either. And a sign that says, "No bikes in store."

Best experience was at my part-time job where my boss said, "I can't give you a direct order because it's personal property, but I strongly suggest you park your bike in the back room rather than lock it to the rack outside." This was surprise because there's a sign on the door: "Bike riders--Lock your bike to the rack. No bikes allowed inside the library."

Patrons have asked why I can bring mine in and they can't, and I tell them it's a perk. I don't have to pay overdue fines either. :)

It seems strange to me... I love in one of the most proportedly 'liberal'/enviro-friendly cities in the country, but many people I meet are still pretty incredulous that I don't have a car. In many cases it's a perceived safety issue: "You ride your bike in the city!?! Isn't that dangerous? Wow, you bicyclist are crazy."

This is puzzling to me... While bicycling in Seattle can be risky/stressful, so is driving. The Puget Sound region has some of the worst traffic in the country, and it can be really difficult to get around the city via car during busy hours (8am-6pm).

Oh well, I guess it's the SOS: Bicycling - some people get it, most don't.

Just a side note, I rode my bike to my LBS Friday evening after work to order something. The place was packed and I was the ONLY person there who hadn't driven to the store. That's no big deal, but most of the other customers gave me odd, surprised looks when I pulled up. I thought that was rather...ironic. Heh.

well..since only my 2nd week..telling others about it more slowly..went to church last wed, as I go about once a month to this church..everybody thought it was cool, to ride..and the pastors son was bothering his mom for a bike! Right now its spring the best time of year to ride..obivous summer will be much hotter though here the avg is low 80's all summer long.
Right now the hardest part is the cost..I though I would use my 10plus year bike for awhile..but on a whim..bought a new $300 bike..so much better and smoother less heavier easier to ride, more comfortable..plus its good to have a back up.
The only thing is getting grocerices I must get a pannier soon.and a rack!
Most folks do look down on you if you only have a bike as your car..but so what..I am in my 30's now..and I could care less..and actually the ladies seem to like it :)..especially zooming up a incline.
Overall..its hard at first..to reliaze you cant just get in and go..you got to prepare..and 20 miles one way..well thats a least a hour ride. a car 30 mins .

Man. I gotta say I'm impressed reading some of these stories. Being in Chicago, it's very easy to be car free. In fact, when I tell people I don't have a car they often respond by giving an excuse for having one, like "well I work in the suburbs so I need to drive." I mean, I don't try to be preachy or anything, it's just that I guess the message has worked enough here that people feel defensive about driving. I'm afraid if I lived in a small town where biking is unusual and there's no transit service I'm not sure I'd do it.

Like tsl I went for several years without a car (went car-free in 2000 or so) before I started biking much. And I still use public transit often as I love all the reading I get done. There really is nothing that beats the freedom and mobility of having a bike though. Even with driving you have to deal with parking every place you go. With a bike it's easy to hop around town running errands.