Foo - Why do they do this?

Okay so I've made up my mind about some big decisions regarding my future. I've started to get everything in order to make this successful. I'm very picky about details so I'm giving this a year to pan out, making sure all my bases are covered. I had accidentally let my plans slip to someone who WAS important to me but now, this person is all of a sudden trying to talk me out of this once he realized that I am serious. What is up with that? Why do people that you see on an almost daily basis treat you regular but then now really want to get involved once it doesn't include them?

Why do I never understand what you're talking about?

Because you are too darned hyper to slow down and READ my posts. :rolleyes:

Get back on yahoo!

Because you are too darned hyper to slow down and READ my posts. :rolleyes:

No really, i'm not sure what you are getting at here.

Are you just venting? If so thats fine and uhh, i'm sorry.

If you are really looking for some sort of answer you're going to have to rewrite your post.

Cuz you picked the wrong person to confide in and trust? Not everyone's the same, so people that you need to trust need to be people you can rely on and not some flighty guy/girl.

Probably because the plans didn't include them.

Give it more than a year. Pick one portion of that larger plan as this year's goal. Then next year another portion. Next thing you know, you're a) successful and b) happy while doing it

(and if that person isn't part of the plans, who gives a sht if that person whines about not being included? If said person still wanted to be important in your life, said person would offer support, not be a selfish 5yr old who had his/her candy taken away. F 'm)

Maybe you should run your plans by Jesus.

I did. He's cool with it. ;)

I get what you are saying. I think.
It bugs me too when I confide in someone in something I am planning to do, or have started to do, and they either snicker or say be careful or gossip about it or sabotage it somehow or just suck the fun out of it. And it seems like the very people that I should be able to trust the most--family-- are the worst offenders. So mostly I've just given up on giving out anything important or personal.

I think its part jealousy, part misunderstanding of how important it is to us, part that they have never really come up with any sort of plan for themselves so they have no feeling for it. New univ degree and a new career? So what, big deal! Remodel the house yourself in your spare time? So what, big deal! Lose weight, become fit, do a century/triathlon? So what, big deal! It could be anything, big or small. If they don't care enough to at least ask questions, much less lend support, screw 'em. Its your bit anyway. When you get all the way through, and find your success in it, you can look back at it and say, YES! I did it all by myself! In spite of the naysayers.

Good luck. And that superdex guy seems pretty smart. Listen to what he said about taking more than a year if you need it. Don't get caught up in feeling like you've failed in it if it takes longer than a year.

Insecure people don't want anyone else to succeed. Watch out for #1, go for it!!! :)

I did. He's cool with it. ;)

God will not be mocked.

God will not be mocked.
That's reserved for Snapper Soup

A whole year? I did it in 6 months!

Because they have feelings for you but are afraid of commitment. This caused them behave in a role they want but have not sought for or was given permission to have depending on your response.

Could I be wrong? :rolleyes:

Yeah, I have some prety bad trust issues, but I've been pretty good at getting over them.

What happened was as a kid, my parents got into a divorce, and it got nasty and stayed nasty...pretty much both of them were trying to use me as a way to dig up dirt on the other, since they each had their own agendas on how this was supposed to pan out. Eventually I got fed up with it and ignored the both of them...then during my own graduation, they could not keep civil...I pretty much threw one of my infamous verbal smackdowns and silenced both of them long enough that I coudl get my own words out (my verbal smackdowns are where I reduce people to a crying mess so they will stop interrupting me when I have something to say...I developed it since neither of my parents will let me get a single word in when they get pissed off...even if they are in the wrong entirely at the moment). Once they realized where I was coming from, they learned to swallow their feelings and try to get along at times like that.

Actually that graduation was one of those things that made me almost want to cut them both off...I'm glad I didn't. That was just pent up rage talking. Pretty much, if any of you ever get into a divorce, please try to be the bigger person and not try to cut down the other...that's more harmful to the kid and your relationship with the kid than you think.

However, I was extremely untrusting with people...even asking to borrow a pencil would result in a hostile response, let alone know what was actually going through my head. Actually my head is still an ugly place (for some reason effed up events gravitated towards me...), but that's another story. It took one extremely stubborn friend to get me out of that rut...and I thank him for that.

I did. He's cool with it. ;)

Or, at least He didn't try to talk you out of it.

Do you really want an answer? When we decided to move abroad (out of the US), many of our friends in the US had negative reactions--- "why would you want to do a thing like that?" "Are you crazy?" etc... and gave all sorts of very negative examples of how difficult it was to relocate, horror stories, etc... most were either jealous or felt threatened by our actions in some way. Bottom line-- they didn't want us to leave.

We spent a year in the planning process as well. we didn't tell anyone outside our immediate family until two months before we moved to reduce this kind of behavior.

as for our decision--- absolutely no regrets.



Okay so I've made up my mind about some big decisions regarding my future. I've started to get everything in order to make this successful. I'm very picky about details so I'm giving this a year to pan out, making sure all my bases are covered. I had accidentally let my plans slip to someone who WAS important to me but now, this person is all of a sudden trying to talk me out of this once he realized that I am serious. What is up with that? Why do people that you see on an almost daily basis treat you regular but then now really want to get involved once it doesn't include them?

Because they can. :lol:

http://couplesreviews.com/wp-images/couplesreviews/dog_licking_balls.jpg

Maybe you should run your plans by Jesus.
Or Christopher Walken.....it would be good to make sure he's cool with it too.

Do you really want an answer? When we decided to move abroad (out of the US), many of our friends in the US had negative reactions--- "why would you want to do a thing like that?" "Are you crazy?" etc... and gave all sorts of very negative examples of how difficult it was to relocate, horror stories, etc... most were either jealous or felt threatened by our actions in some way. Bottom line-- they didn't want us to leave.

We spent a year in the planning process as well. we didn't tell anyone outside our immediate family until two months before we moved to reduce this kind of behavior.

as for our decision--- absolutely no regrets.


Do the Norwegians force everyone to wear backpacks?

Or Christopher Walken.....it would be good to make sure he's cool with it too.

and remember, when he says it needs cowbell, you best do as he says...look what cowbell did for the Blue Oyster Cult! :D

Oh, and Norway pwns so hard for two reasons: Fjords, and cute Norwegian women :)

...oh and that caviar in a tube stuff...put some of that on toast with that gelled fish stuff, and it was super tasty. Norwegian food....strange but good.

I could certainly be wrong but it sounds like you are describing someone who is perhaps a bit self centered, and has been taking your friendship for granted.

A true friend would support you, even if it takes you out of their life. You gotta do what's best for you.

I could certainly be wrong but it sounds like you are describing someone who is perhaps a bit self centered, and has been taking your friendship for granted.

I think this is right on. I might also add that, if you're of the opposite gender of one another--and both single (you don't have to answer that)--and your plans involve leaving--he's probably also been digging your chili.

Because they can. :lol:

http://couplesreviews.com/wp-images/couplesreviews/dog_licking_balls.jpg
What is that thing? Rat Terrier? Dumbest dogs every.

<---- shakes head

I dunno, but you missed the humor. :rolleyes:

I think this is right on. I might also add that, if you're of the opposite gender of one another--and both single (you don't have to answer that)--and your plans involve leaving--he's probably also been digging your chili.
Yap, you never realize how much you like someone / something until their gone. Not sure how you feel about them but it sounds like a case of sh#t or get off the pot to me.

<---- shakes head

I dunno, but you missed the humor. :rolleyes:
Was there humor? I guess I did miss it.

Was there humor? I guess I did miss it.
Well, if I gots to 'splain it to ya...
Dog licks ball, because he can.