Jokes & Humor - guillotine joke

A priest, a thief and an engineer are all slated to be executed by guillotine. The priest is to be dispatched first and the executioner asks him:

“How do you want to face on the guillotine?”

The priest responds:

“With my face up, looking toward heaven.”

The executioner accedes and the priest is laid face up on the guillotine. The executioner pulls the cord; the blade drops, and then miraculously stops within mere inches of the priest’s neck. The gathered witnesses gasp in astonishment. Everybody agrees that it is a miracle and sign of divine intervention and the priest’s life is spared.

The thief is next. When the executioner asks how he’d like to be positioned the thief responds:

“With my face up, looking toward heaven.”

The executioner complies, and the thief is laid down face up. The cord is pulled. The blade falls, and, as
with the priest the blade stops inches from the thief’s neck. Again the witnesses gasp. They can understand
a miracle occurring with the priest but with a thief! Nonetheless, they take it as a sign from god, and release
the thief.

Finally, it’s the engineer’s turn. Like the other two he wishes to be executed face up, looking toward heaven. The executioner lays him down, but before he can pull the cord the engineer yells out:

“Stop! Stop!”

The executioner pauses, and the engineer, looking up at the guillotine says, “I think I see the problem.”

A priest, a thief and an engineer are all slated to be executed by guillotine. The priest is to be dispatched first and the executioner asks him:

“How do you want to face on the guillotine?”

The priest responds:

“With my face up, looking toward heaven.”

The executioner accedes and the priest is laid face up on the guillotine. The executioner pulls the cord; the blade drops, and then miraculously stops within mere inches of the priest’s neck. The gathered witnesses gasp in astonishment. Everybody agrees that it is a miracle and sign of divine intervention and the priest’s life is spared.

The thief is next. When the executioner asks how he’d like to be positioned the thief responds:

“With my face up, looking toward heaven.”

The executioner complies, and the thief is laid down face up. The cord is pulled. The blade falls, and, as
with the priest the blade stops inches from the thief’s neck. Again the witnesses gasp. They can understand
a miracle occurring with the priest but with a thief! Nonetheless, they take it as a sign from god, and release
the thief.

Finally, it’s the engineer’s turn. Like the other two he wishes to be executed face up, looking toward heaven. The executioner lays him down, but before he can pull the cord the engineer yells out:

“Stop! Stop!”

The executioner pauses, and the engineer, looking up at the guillotine says, “I think I see the problem.”


ha!.....haha......hahahahah!

It was witty!

Five surgeons were taking a coffee break. The first surgeon said, "Accountants are the best to operate on because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered."

The second surgeon said, "Nah, librarians are the best. Everything inside them is in alphabetical order."

The third surgeon responded, "Try electricians, man! Everything inside them is color coded."

Then the fourth doctor interceded, "I prefer lawyers. They're heartless, spineless, gutless and their heads and their butts are interchangeable."

To which the fifth surgeon, who had been quietly listening to the conversation, replied, "I like engineers. They always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end."

A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Monk are waiting in a lifeboat. The Priest turns to the Rabbi and says,"What is this, some kind of joke?"

Preist
:D

btw, i before e

A priest, a thief and an engineer are all slated to be executed by guillotine. The priest is to be dispatched first and the executioner asks him:

“How do you want to face on the guillotine?”

The priest responds:

“With my face up, looking toward heaven.”

The executioner accedes and the priest is laid face up on the guillotine. The executioner pulls the cord; the blade drops, and then miraculously stops within mere inches of the priest’s neck. The gathered witnesses gasp in astonishment. Everybody agrees that it is a miracle and sign of divine intervention and the priest’s life is spared.

The thief is next. When the executioner asks how he’d like to be positioned the thief responds:

“With my face up, looking toward heaven.”

The executioner complies, and the thief is laid down face up. The cord is pulled. The blade falls, and, as
with the priest the blade stops inches from the thief’s neck. Again the witnesses gasp. They can understand
a miracle occurring with the priest but with a thief! Nonetheless, they take it as a sign from god, and release
the thief.

Finally, it’s the engineer’s turn. Like the other two he wishes to be executed face up, looking toward heaven. The executioner lays him down, but before he can pull the cord the engineer yells out:

“Stop! Stop!”

The executioner pauses, and the engineer, looking up at the guillotine says, “I think I see the problem.”


Saw that one coming...............