Foo - Women are not romantic

So, I get home yesterday, clean up the kitchen and have dinner on the table when my wife comes home. After 35 years of marriage I am still tickled to death to see her and I give her a big hug, kissing her cheek and neck. Know how she responds?

"When do think we can have those front windows replaced?"

Sometimes I feel like Bill Murray in Lost in Translation, only without Scarlett Johansson.

I shake my head.

It takes 2 to be romantic. Its like a sound that nobody hears. If the other person isn't receptive, its not romance.

They say that eyes are the windows of the soul. Maybe your wife was just confused.

HEE HEE, thats kinda funny I think maybe she thought it was a good time to hit you up with the question since you were being romantic?? :)

If the other person isn't receptive, its not romance.

So I should toss out this cache of horse tranquilizers then,eh?

"When do think we can have those front windows replaced?"
.
in about 2 seconds when i throw you through them!

So I should toss out this cache of horse tranquilizers then,eh?

Welllllll, that sorta makes the other person receptive, doesn't it? :rolleyes:

my GF comes up with some horribly unromantic chores to do as well. she also does this thing where she'll slip a little task in right as we're leaving to go somewhere fun. we always have to empty the dishwasher, take out the trash, or empty the cat litter first.

So I should toss out this cache of horse tranquilizers then,eh?
"oooh, oooh, I'll take them!!!!"

*Terrell Owens raises hand*

Welllllll, that sorta makes the other person receptive, doesn't it? :rolleyes:

I'm sorry. I thought you said "responsive". Carry on...

...I am still tickled to death to see her and I give her a big hug, kissing her cheek and neck. Know how she responds?

"When do think we can have those front windows replaced?"

Sometimes I feel like Bill Murray in Lost in Translation, only without Scarlett Johansson.Heh, heh... welcome to marriage!!! :)

bleh.
i had nothing nice to say

Heh, heh... welcome to marriage!!! :)

A bunch of us old guys were having lunch with a young fella the other day. The young guy commented on how it must be great being married. "You guys get to have sex any time you want."

One guy passed a ham on rye through his nose he was laughing so hard.

I remember this bit from a comedian, I forgot his name though:

The sex therapist always say to do someting spontaneous to spice up your love life. So yesterday when I was loading the dishwasher, I dropped my pants and masturbated.

A bunch of us old guys were having lunch with a young fella the other day. The young guy commented on how it must be great being married. "You guys get to have sex any time you want."

One guy passed a ham on rye through his nose he was laughing so hard.

Turkey on wheat here...ya bastid! :D

Im the same way, make dinner for me and Ill look at you funny and say, what do you want? sex? just say it instead of going through all that trouble!

Im the same way, make dinner for me and Ill look at you funny and say, what do you want? sex? just say it instead of going through all that trouble!
:roflmao: :roflmao: :roflmao: :roflmao:

Somebody remind me not to fall in love - it makes you stupid
and if i get married will somebody please put a bullet through my head.

:roflmao: :roflmao: :roflmao: :roflmao:

Somebody remind me not to fall in love - it makes you stupid
and if i get married will somebody please put a bullet through my head.
you might just get your way and die a lonely man.
but the thruth is you enjoy company more then you like to admit, you're here laughing, everyday, arent you :)
yeah , I like you too grumpy

Women may not be romantic, true.

Maybe that's why they love me so much. Perhaps I compensate for their shotcomings, and they appreciate the difference. Opposites do attract, you know.

you get what you give...maybe some people are giving the wrong thing.

I remember this bit from a comedian, I forgot his name though:

The sex therapist always say to do someting spontaneous to spice up your love life. So yesterday when I was loading the dishwasher, I dropped my pants and masturbated.
TMI, funny though lmao.:roflmao: :roflmao:

If a woman is unwilling, draw her a bath with roses.

If she continues to smite you, drown her in the bathtub, and bury her in the rose garden.

(For slovid)

God, I feel icky for penning that bit of poison. Misogony is not my stlye.

Women may not be romantic, true.I don't know about that. My girl got me a torque-wrench and helped me install a new turbo on my car last weekend... That almost makes me cry just writing about it...

I don't know about that. My girl got me a torque-wrench and helped me install a new turbo on my car last weekend... That almost makes me cry just writing about it...

That isn't romance. that's maintainence.

Romance is a scented letter. A flower. A stroll through the garden. A moonlit kiss. A candlelit dinner. A bottle of wine, and two glasses. An ocean view. Two tickets to Paris. A shopping spree in New York. A theater in London. A wake-up call. A sincere compliment.

These are cliches, to be certain. But I reserve my spontanious romantic behaviour for the soul of a woman. In that case,I shall reveal nothing.

Im the same way, make dinner for me and Ill look at you funny and say, what do you want? sex? just say it instead of going through all that trouble!

so you're saying it's better to just walk up to her and say.. "sex plz ty"?:eek:

I don't know about that. My girl got me a torque-wrench and helped me install a new turbo on my car last weekend... That almost makes me cry just writing about it...

Well now, this morning she did suggest that we meet at an Italian restaurant tonight so I can load up on pasta for that century tomorrow.

so you're saying it's better to just walk up to her and say.. "sex plz ty"?:eek:

Better to not say anything at all. She already knew what you wanted the minute she met you.

you might just get your way and die a lonely man.
Probably, but hopefully I'll never get "extremely hurt and pissed" beacause I find text messages to somebody else on my ex-wife's phone that are dated 6-9 months AFTER he already knew the marriage was over. I mean seriously. That's ust ridiculous.


but the thruth is you enjoy company more then you like to admit, you're here laughing, everyday, arent you :)

Yes but I don't have to take you all home and deal with you all 24/7 for 30 years :p


yeah , I like you too grumpy
Awwww I feeel soo :love: d

Well now, this morning she did suggest that we meet at an Italian restaurant tonight so I can load up on pasta for that century tomorrow.
Now that's true :love: :p

Probably, but hopefully I'll never get "extremely hurt and pissed" beacause I find text messages to somebody else on my ex-wife's phone that are dated 6-9 months AFTER he already knew the marriage was over. I mean seriously. That's ust ridiculous.

Yes but I don't have to take you all home and deal with you all 24/7 for 30 years :p

Awwww I feeel soo :love: d
you are and who ever hurt you so much that got you scared of people deserves a beating!:eek:

so you're saying it's better to just walk up to her and say.. "sex plz ty"?:eek:
it has worked for me!:D
that's the secret of communicating between a men and a woman.

men says he's hungry, that means he's hungry
woman says she's hungry, that means you didnt stop at the store like she asked you and now it's your fault that she is suffering.

men says he's tired, that means he's tired
woman says she's tired, that means get off of her.

how do you think I succeeded in keeping my marriage for 18 years?
dont try and decode me, take the short route and speak your mind!

That's why I always hate it when chics ask, "Where are you going?" or "What have you been doing?". Seemingly simple innocent questions laced with severe undertones & possibilities... >cringe<... :(


That isn't romance. that's maintainence.

Romance is a scented letter. A flower. A stroll through the garden. A moonlit kiss. A candlelit dinner. A bottle of wine, and two glasses. An ocean view. Two tickets to Paris. A shopping spree in New York. A theater in London. A wake-up call. A sincere compliment.

These are cliches, to be certain. But I reserve my spontanious romantic behaviour for the soul of a woman. In that case,I shall reveal nothing.Yeah, but this is about women being romantic towards men. What works for chics and makes them go "awww" doesn't do it for guys. While bringing flowers and having candle-lit home-made dinner and cuddling up to the fireplace watching a movie may work for a lot of chics, it doesn't do it for a lot of guys. But giving a torque-wrench and getting dirty helping me with my car? Now that's true love and I'd almost marry a chic like that! ;)

dont try and decode me, take the short route and speak your mind!

Ok fine, let's boink like silly sailors!

:eek:
Ok fine, let's boink like silly sailors!
silly sailors????:p

:eek:
silly sailors????:p

Yepper...you outta see them squids go at it with each other when they been out of port for a few weeks.
(oh my, now I've gone and offended the Navy....shucky darn!)

Yepper...you outta see them squids go at it with each other when they been out of port for a few weeks.


Aye, no capt'n!

But it does give "swab the deck" a new meaning.

Also see: "Raise the periscope", and "Torpedoes Away!!" for furthur silliness.

:eek:
Yepper...you outta see them squids go at it with each other when they been out of port for a few weeks.
(oh my, now I've gone and offended the Navy....shucky darn!)
my eyes!!! now I have to go and bleach them!

:eek:
my eyes!!! now I have to go and bleach them!

Just don't get any in your hair! Wait...nevermind.

What was the original topic? :p

I don't know about that. My girl got me a torque-wrench and helped me install a new turbo on my car last weekend... That almost makes me cry just writing about it...
That's why I'm single. If I bought a torque wrench it would either be mine, or you'd be using your new wrench on my car. ;) Okay, maybe my bike too.

Just don't get any in your hair! Wait...nevermind.
ha! here's a new line I have never heard before... if only I bleached my hair I could take offence, but for now Ill just get a good laugh out of ignorance and stereotypes :)

Yepper...you outta see them squids go at it with each other when they been out of port for a few weeks.
(oh my, now I've gone and offended the Navy....shucky darn!)

:roflmao: