Commuting - How much do you tell your significant other?

Do you reveal every mishap or run-in with rude drivers or do you take a more tight lipped approach? I guess I'm somewhere in between. Mine is a fair weather commuter so I usually spare her most of the details but if something really freaky/scary/funny happens I'll bring it up.

I talk in my sleep, so she'll find out one way or another. :) I tell her exactly what my commute is like, even the minor run-ins that don't result in me taking a bail or getting bumped. She freaks out sometimes, but she also doesn't try to stop me, except for this past Tuesday.
That was the first day after all the Seattle snowfall, the roads were cr@p, people were still trying to drive and sliding all around... she convinced me to wait an extra hour until it was light out before I left. While waiting out the hour, I got a call from my boss saying all 3 of our lab facilities were closed for the day.

I tone it down because she worries too much as it is...

The snow was fun. I made some studded tires for my mountain bike on tuesday and told her I was going to test them out on the ice rink roads in our neighborhood. Be back real quick, I said. They worked so well and it was so much fun, it was hard to end the ride. I rode to work and back the next two days on the studded tires.

I tell her everything. She doesn't mind me commuting by bicycle. It has become a necessity in our family. I like it that way really. She just shakes her head and offers her sympathy for the idiotic drivers, and sometimes sets me straight. When I mentioned the word "cagers" the other day she just looked at me and said "You are such an elitiest..." lol. I think its great!

I don't talk about my riding. In fact, I don't really talk about my day at all since I've been riding to work. By the time I get home I'm completely unwound and stress-free.

I only vent about the more interesting or dangerous ones.

Pretty much in line with how much I share about my drives.

I can't get a word in edgewise. No worries here.

No way the TV's always blar'n - can't get a word in edgewise.

Only when it is something funny or interesting do I tell my wife. She could probably care less about every_single_incident I have on my daily commute. She doesn't worry because she has seen how I ride.

Only the positive things. Like the wildlife I spot (ok, maybe not the two-legged kind). She gets worried sometimes but I point out the Daddy lotto with the big cash payout.

Wednesday night's incident on Yonge Street, where I accidently nose-wheelied my road bike at 45kph in a panic stop behind a cube truck, got omitted.

I was hoping I could just forget about it myself as well.

Most everything except about glorious screaming descents. That she does not want to hear about.

I tell her everything, except for the little stuff that costs money.
"Oh... it was just a little nick, I just bought a cheap one to replace it for a few bucks." [it was really over 200 bucks]. That kind of thing.

I tell her everything, except for the little stuff that costs money.
"Oh... it was just a little nick, I just bought a cheap one to replace it for a few bucks." [it was really over 200 bucks]. That kind of thing.
+1

When I mentioned the word "cagers" the other day she just looked at me and said "You are such an elitiest..." lol. I think its great!

Yes! -- that's exactly the reaction of my wife, too. She's thrilled I'm getting the exercise and I'll tell her about impatient drivers or other quirky encounters. She couldn't care less, but listens anyway. What a woman... :o

...only when she has to pick me up from the hospital or police station.

...only when she has to pick me up from the hospital or police station.

:lol: I hear you . She keeps telling me that they are not trying to kill me. But if they come close to it then it's my turn to try and kill them :lol:

how interesting we all have similar experiences. she just listens, tells me to ride safe. i know she doesn't REALLY care about the details, sometimes she falls asleep when we are talking about it at night. i don't want her to worry about me, she worries enough.

I'll tell my wife almost everything about riding. Some things are better left unsaid. She tells me to be careful when I go for a ride and I'll tell her that I always am.

I tell my fiancé the highlights. Most everything else is pretty routine. He worries, but I just assure him that I'll mount my blinkies in poor visibility and wear my optic yellows. oh, and the cell phone is a big help, especially for longer rides. I often neglect to report any events that resulted from my own stupidity (at least for a few days). But that might be more for my (pride's) protection than his.

My wife and I exchange commuting horror stories. I go by bike, she goes by bus. From what I hear from her it sounds like I have far far better experiences with the few human beings I encounter.

On the other hand I had a rash of accidents last month. I think i'll stop telling her about the ones that don't involve damage to the bike and only give me some bruising. She got far to worried.

Man you guys don't get it. Ya gotta tell her about every near miss, embellishing your superior skills in avoiding disaster to the max while ensuring that she knows that every time you walk out the door, it may be the last time she ever sees you again. Why? 'Going off to war sex', of course! :D

Wow, that's a two way street in this house!

http://www.pbase.com/image/71075380.jpg

My wife rides as much as I do and that includes commuting. :love:

SMACK....errrr, sorry honey....she commutes *more* than I do :o (but does have a shorter and nicer commute than I).

So she tells me her stories and I tell mine.

how interesting we all have similar experiences. she just listens, tells me to ride safe. i know she doesn't REALLY care about the details, sometimes she falls asleep when we are talking about it at night. i don't want her to worry about me, she worries enough.

What a great way to give her nightmares. :p

Here's what she hears:
Riding up the hill... look at watt meter.. 400 watts.. roughly 19mph... car.. maniac.. screeching... jagged metal... slice...cut... dead... jab... zzzzzzzz... AHHHHHHH!!

I tell her only if she asks because I talk way too much about cycling as it is and even then, I give her a a simple "It was great!" unless there is something out of the oridinary.

She's great. She puts up with all my chatter about the Commute, about the awsome Mountain Biking trip, the fast Road ride or the CX experiment. All this, on top of the yapping about the parts/equipment I want and wrenching my bikes..

The snow was fun. I made some studded tires for my mountain bike on tuesday and told her I was going to test them out on the ice rink roads in our neighborhood. Be back real quick, I said. They worked so well and it was so much fun, it was hard to end the ride. I rode to work and back the next two days on the studded tires.

Studded Tires ROCK!

The last time I talked about my commute, it went something like this.

Me: I'm in the emergency room, but don't worry, I'm fine. I flipped over the handlebars and landed on my head.
Her: What?!?!?

I used to tell my husband abbout my commute but lately he has been freaking out and he started telling me how I should ride more carefully and I should not flip the bird to the cagers who don't yield to bicycle crossings etc etc... So now I tell him the good things, the birds, the sunset and keep the rest to myself.

I'm in between. I usually tell her about my wipeouts, but did not tell her, Monday, after she spent the morning trying to talk me out of riding in the ice/snow, how I flipped as soon as I rounded the corner from our house. At least I was going slow. Entertaining for the 3rd/4th graders playing in the street enjoying their snow delay. Fortunately the sister of our son's friend was not there to relay the story, so I think I remained safely anonymous. I meant to do that.

The last time I talked about my commute, it went something like this.

Me: I'm in the emergency room, but don't worry, I'm fine. I flipped over the handlebars and landed on my head.
Her: What?!?!?

Her: James touched you where?!

Her: James touched you where?!
Me: What?!?!?

I did when I first started then I realized she wasn't paying much attention becasue it was all just the same stories. Now it goes like this...
Her: How was the ride?
Me: Uneventful. How was your day?
Her: * Insert 2 hour discussion.*

Two personal rules:

1. Never lie or tell a half-truth.
2. Reveal everything.

There's less to remember this way and no surprises. Besides, she's a very experienced cyclist and knows what it's like out there. She spent enough time on the back of our tandem to know how I ride, so if I told her that everything was always rosy, she'd never believe me. :)

We both ride, often the same roads. We know what it's like and tell each other everything interesting. Then we worry about each other, shake heads and tell each other to "ride safely". :D

How much do I tell her?

Not much.

mostly just the crashes, but usually there is enough evidence of that anyways what's the point of not saying it.

I never though it worthwhile to tell all the gory details back when I was driving. Can't see why it's any different now.

I leave out the accidents that happen to other people. Also I leave out the parts concerning the woman with the black legwarmers and the super short boy-cut bike shorts.

I tell my husband about the fun/interesting/weird stuff that happens. I try not to tell him too much scary stuff because he worries about me.

Everyone has a little filter in their head, (you know, the one that keeps you from sharing things you shouldn't). My wife says that my filter is either broken or severely maladjusted since I tend to share every gory detail, right down to the guy who circled the block to have another go at buzzing and cussing me.

I guess the saving grace in all of this is that I've been in far more life-threatening situations than bicycle commuting, over the years. She worries less now than she did when we were younger.

I don't really share too much - it's usually more if we're walking down the street and I'll see some typical craziness on the road, I'll comment and relate it to something on my ride. After a few weeks back in the swing, I noticed that my daily reports would soon become very boring (not one ride without at least some sort of incident). I'm not sure if it's because she doesn't understand or know, or just isn't really too bothered (confidence in me?) but my wife doesn't seem too worried about my riding. My friends and colleagues comment more often on various things - me being crazy, etc.

I think being in Toronto helps, we do have some pretty bike-friendly traffic out there for the most part.

I tell her as much as she wants to hear with my internal editor set to delete most of the scary stuff, technical details, top speeds etc.

I share the fun stuff: telling off the Beemer driver in his own driveway after he honked at me for having to wait two seconds to turn. The guy who got pulled over for tailgating and honking at me. 35+mph sprints on a fully loaded commuter bike with a good tailwind. Getting to work in under an hour after 8 inches of snow with no issues on the backroads and hearing about coworkers going the same distance in 45 minutes but almost crashing several times on the main roads. Everything else is either too boring or something she's experienced before too and thus not very exciting.

I did when I first started then I realized she wasn't paying much attention becasue it was all just the same stories. Now it goes like this...
Her: How was the ride?
Me: Uneventful. How was your day?
Her: * Insert 2 hour discussion.*

:roflmao:

I don't have to tell her much, seeing as she's usually coming up on my left to try and pass me...

I tell her when I am leaving so that she will know to keep her cell phone handy if I have a problem out on the road. I tell her when I have made it in safely so she won't worry.

That's it, and that's fine with me.

Yeah highlight the positives- but if my S.O. were to start bike commuting I'd give a good primer on safety, especially if sharing my route.

Most days are uneventful for me. Mostly side streets with just a few crossings at some busy streets and a heavily trafficked mall (this time of year, and dark at 5pm).

Luckily not much bad news :)

We both share most our stories. She commutes, and races (w/ the broken collarbone to prove it), so not much fazes her. Though she gets more fired up about the cagers than I do. I tend to take them in stride, she is out flipping the bird and cussing!