Tandem Cycling - How Now Brown Cow

OK - funny story.

Saturday was beautiful and the Mrs. and I were out for only her 5th ride since buying the tandem. (She's loving it by the way.) As we pass a small feedlot (think cattle - we're in NE Kansas), I get the first indication that her attention is beginning to wander. Said wanderlust manifested its self in the form of soprano "mooing" (at the cattle) by the back seater. :rolleyes: Hmmmmm.....no - it wasn't comentary on the breadth of my back side. Clearly this pathetic attempt at soliciting bovine attention required instruction. I proceeded to inform the Mrs. that no self respecting cow would listen to her two octaves too high mooing and demonstrated an appropriately manly "moo". The frightening part is that I've done it when by myself on my single, but never would I have believed that my better half would consider such a thing.

When told of this development, our youngest child (a 14 year old teenage girl) was mortified. In fact, the she asked that we please verify that no one else was close enough to hear when Mom tried to talk to the animals.

Gotta love time together!

Every once in a while I get the urge to "talk to the cows" also and let go with a good, loud "moo!" I did this as a single bike rider and have continued the tradition while out on the tandem. Don't think I've ever gotten a reply from the bovines, but quite often they will scatter heading for a quieter end of the pasture. Recently my wife has chimed in and done her own rendition of "cow talk". I agree it's a little high pitched to elicit a response. She doesn't scatter them like me, they just stand there and stare. I'd be interested to know what they are thinking.

OK - funny story.


When told of this development, our youngest child (a 14 year old teenage girl) was mortified. In fact, the she asked that we please verify that no one else was close enough to hear when Mom tried to talk to the animals.

Gotta love time together!

One of the joys of being a Dad is embarassing the offspring- So take the same route and practice mooing in harmony- When perfected, start doing it round the house and don't stop until the Teenager has cleaned the bike for you.

Another thing we practice is (Dog) Barking at the sheep on the hills. Probably another way to annoy a teenager.

My stoker talks to horses. Unfortunately putting the screws to the pace only wears me out. In order to shut people up in group rides on singles you just ratchet the pace till it's quiet back there but doesn't work on the tandem.

I can do a pretty good and very loud bull impersonation. My wife hates it when I do it on the tandem because I scare her to death. When our girls where younger and we were out camping I would do my "Bull Yell" whithout any advance notice... it would always work.

We talk to the animals all the time, the cows never answer but sometimes the goats do.

I don't speak dog as well as most dogs understand human, so I usually just say "nice doggie" when they're are being good and

"NO"

when they're not.

If we're riding in a group and see cows laying down, I often ask other riders if they know why they do that. It's surprising how many still respond "No, I don't know. Why do cows lay down". It's because their legs are tired.

Living out west in open range country, cows have the right of way . . . you hit one, you pay!
Of course fences are sometimes only decorative . . . had one bull come charging for a fence while we were on the I-10 frontage road on the tandem. He promptly came over the fence right in front of us and headed for the fence that separated our road from the freeway. That fence was covered in vines . . . the bull bounced off that fence, looked at us glaringly, ran in front of us again and jumped back over the fence into the pasture. That was a lot of bull!
No moooooing sounds from us!

When told of this development, our youngest child (a 14 year old teenage girl) was mortified. In fact, the she asked that we please verify that no one else was close enough to hear when Mom tried to talk to the animals.
And of course you will send her a link to this discussion thread, closing the loop and confirming that her parents have truly gone over the edge?

Time to mooooove on....

OK - funny story.

Saturday was beautiful and the Mrs. and I were out for only her 5th ride since buying the tandem. (She's loving it by the way.) As we pass a small feedlot (think cattle - we're in NE Kansas), I get the first indication that her attention is beginning to wander. Said wanderlust manifested its self in the form of soprano "mooing" (at the cattle) by the back seater. :rolleyes: Hmmmmm.....no - it wasn't comentary on the breadth of my back side. Clearly this pathetic attempt at soliciting bovine attention required instruction. I proceeded to inform the Mrs. that no self respecting cow would listen to her two octaves too high mooing and demonstrated an appropriately manly "moo". The frightening part is that I've done it when by myself on my single, but never would I have believed that my better half would consider such a thing.

When told of this development, our youngest child (a 14 year old teenage girl) was mortified. In fact, the she asked that we please verify that no one else was close enough to hear when Mom tried to talk to the animals.

Gotta love time together!

Our kids are a tad older but as easy to embarrass. Keep up the good work! Eventually they'll develop a thick skin.

I honk at geese, I gobble at turkeys, moo at cows, cluck at horses. I even answer crows (when they go, "Caw! Caw! Caw!" I reply "Yes, dear," if on the tandem; props to my sister & her hubby). Who cares? As long as you're loving the ride, what does it matter which critter you talk to?

You should hear the jokes I crack when we climb the hill past the fielv of donkeys, heh, heh. I love a good pun.

Here in Wisconsin, we have plenty of cows to moo at; then again, we are COWs -- i.e., members of Couples On Wheels (who, BTW, are hosting MTR in Appleton over this Labor Day weekend). Our daughter, eight this year, is usually the first to talk to the animals. Cows rarely respond, but she has had rather lengthy conversations with some local goats.

WisCOWsin? Is that an udder state?

both of us talk to just about every animal we pass. We have a turtle squeekie on the back so she can really get the horses going when they're close to the road.

Most Aussie animals don't talk too much, apart from the birds.

Sheep are boring, kind of like clumps of wooly grass, unless it is spring and the lambs are springing. The koalas are always asleep when we're on the bike. Cows are always good for a MOO, you can have a fulfilling conversation with a cow in comparison to your average marsupial. Kangaroo - chew chew chew, hop hop hop. No moo.

Echidnas, no matter how cute, are only ever good for a kind of shuffling motion with your hand.

The first time that I read your post I thought that you said your wife was "mooning" the cows.

The first time that I read your post I thought that you said your wife was "mooning" the cows.

Funny that you mention mooning...

Yesterday my beloved returned from her post work-day, afternoon ride about the same time I arrived home from work. As I was getting out of my leathers she rolled her bike past me in the garage and I noticed that her shorts were looking a bit "cheeky".

While I appreciated the tease, I suggested that she probably needed to retire those shorts as lycra has a tendency to become semi-opaque towards the end of its useful life.

It must be something to do with Kansas, my wife does the same thing when we are out on one of our tandems. As a matter of fact the night before last we road past some cattle and sure enough mooooooooo! She will also whinny at the horses. However she will not bark at the dogs::eek: . As a matter of fact I can always tell when there is one coming, I feel a surge of power and the speed picks up quickly!:D
This moooooooing and whinnying only happens when we are doing say a 15 to 16 mph average for 20 to 30 miles, If you pickup the speed to say 20mph ave. or stretch out the miles 50 plus in gets real quiet back there!
By the way we live in south central Kansas.

As I was getting out of my leathers she rolled her bike past me in the garage and I noticed that her shorts were looking a bit "cheeky".

While I appreciated the tease, I suggested that she probably needed to retire those shorts as lycra has a tendency to become semi-opaque towards the end of its useful life.

I had a regular training partner that because of his size would usually pull us through the flats while I paced the hills. He refused to retire those shorts. I kind of dreaded seeing the hairs on his rear during the long pulls, lol.