"The 33"-Road Bike Racing - Feeling a little deflated

So it looks like my racing is over for a while, and I'm getting kind of depressed. Maybe y'all can provide some encouragement.

- I graduate college in a little over a month.
- After graduation I have to move, then start my new job.
- I'm moving to an area that isn't exactly biker friendly (in all aspects: driver awareness, route availability, road quality, etc.)
- I still have a wedding (August 24) to plan. And a honeymoon.
- Every weekend from here to Graduation is booked with wedding stuff, job stuff, family stuff, etc.

i'm depressed.

Addition: I'm moving to Herndon, VA

If it makes you feel better, my balls hurt.

all this and you're 22? sounds to me like u should be happy about ur wedding and all this stuff if u chose to do it now.

I am happy, but I want to race damnit.

- I still have a wedding (August 24) to plan. And a honeymoon.

i'm depressed.

Consider:

1) Angelinia Jolie is never going to look at you as anything other than a creepy stalker. The fact that anyone even remotely sane will marry you with that restraining order out there should have you skipping around like a little schoolgirl.

2) Just because the travel agent suggested Detroit or Trenton for a honeymoon location doesn't mean you have to go there.

3) Even if you end up in Trenton or Detroit for your honeymoon, there's at least a possibility you'll finally have sex with someone (other than yourself).

4) The Classics season has started.

That's all I have.

Well,

at some point reality and life's other requirements take over. Yeah it sucks, but instead of worrying about racing, see this as an opportunity to train. Training can for the most part still be done on the weekdays and weeekends (start early). Also - as I have done with my fiance. Make them understand the importance of cycling in your life and how it effects your mood. It could be worse, you could also be expecting a kid.

Seriously?! Stop whining! These are all great milestones in your life and they are all coming at the same time. You are entering a new phase of your life and it only get's better from here...unless you crash and break your neck or something (knock, knock).

If all you REALLY want to do is race, maybe you should reconsider your career and wedding...

:D

you are young and consumed by the competitive passion that is unfortunately stifled in too many of today's youth. iirc you were a runner that has converted to cycling and have carried over the same killer instinct from that sport. i am very similar in this regard--> converted track runner now cycling having just graduated from college. i was in a similar situation over the summer (cept no wife/wedding). i was graduating, dealing with a relationship ending, determining where i was going to go to law school, working at my shop everyday, sick family memeber, etc. but i took comfort in the fact that these are all things that happen very infrequently in a lifetime. we (hopefully) only get married once, have careers that prosper, have wonderful homes and family ties, etc. you are experiencing several of these once in a lifetime events at one time which is rare. although it is frustrating now, you will emerge as a more complete person, even more determined/LIKELY to succeed at your sport.

geez this post is corny. but true.

Consider:

1) Angelinia Jolie is never going to look at you as anything other than a creepy stalker. The fact that anyone even remotely sane will marry you with that restraining order out there should have you skipping around like a little schoolgirl.

2) Just because the travel agent suggested Detroit or Trenton for a honeymoon location doesn't mean you have to go there.

3) Even if you end up in Trenton or Detroit for your honeymoon, there's at least a possibility you'll finally have sex with someone (other than yourself).

4) The Classics season has started.

That's all I have.

couldn't get past the jolie citation. she's a nutter. period. understood?

So it looks like my racing is over for a while, and I'm getting kind of depressed. Maybe y'all can provide some encouragement.

- I graduate college in a little over a month.
- After graduation I have to move, then start my new job.
- I'm moving to an area that isn't exactly biker friendly (in all aspects: driver awareness, route availability, road quality, etc.)
- I still have a wedding (August 24) to plan. And a honeymoon.
- Every weekend from here to Graduation is booked with wedding stuff, job stuff, family stuff, etc.

i'm depressed.

It doesn't really matter. Once you are married, you'll have to sell your bikes anyway. :D Of course I'm kidding, but I have seen this happen several times!

... Brad

weekday crits.

where you movin, anyhows?

If it makes you feel better, my balls hurt.

...spit my pretzel out!

Ah, the magic of Cypress.

Now, to the OP.....
Just let it be forr a while.

Cycling comes and goes in CYCLES....If other things take over for a while...so be it. You'll come back to cycling when the time is right.

Depressed?

Hell, you've got the best years of your life ahead of you now....go make some real money and buy some bling...get married and get neutered of all that is single guy lifestyle...

There's a reason why the stats surge for participation of this sport for folks in their mid 30's. You may well have just hit upon it.

Vino: Brutal, but friggen hilarious.

If you don't have time to race or train for racing, then just ride when you have the time.

It's nothing to get depressed about. Depression should be reserved for funerals, winter, and your wedding.

So it does look like you do have a reason to be depressed.

So it looks like my racing is over for a while, and I'm getting kind of depressed. Maybe y'all can provide some encouragement.

- I graduate college in a little over a month.
- After graduation I have to move, then start my new job.
- I'm moving to an area that isn't exactly biker friendly (in all aspects: driver awareness, route availability, road quality, etc.)
- I still have a wedding (August 24) to plan. And a honeymoon.
- Every weekend from here to Graduation is booked with wedding stuff, job stuff, family stuff, etc.

i'm depressed.

Addition: I'm moving to Herndon, VA


Why are you growing up soo soon??

Isn't that why they invented grad school??

Where exactly on BF did you read that getting married would be good for biking??

Call off the wedding, get into grad school and prolong all your agony another 2-3 years, you only have a short time to save the next 2-3 years fo your life, make these decisions now and get them behind you.

And if your really lucky, you will already have tickets for your honeymoon, take your bike, and get in some good training at your exotic location!

Isn't this what you were hoping to hear?

BTW, graduated from grad school at 27, got married at 33 and first kid at 38, I loved my twenties, would not change a thing.

met a girl, fell in love, yadda yadda yadda, she rides too.

Why the rush anyways?

Are you Mormon?

If it makes you feel better, my balls hurt.

Really? Have you had this checked? Do you know how to do a self exam? I'm actually being serious here...

Why the rush anyways?

Are you Mormon?

No, Catholic :) *hint hint wink wink nudge nudge*

Really? Have you had this checked? Do you know how to do a self exam? I'm actually being serious here...

I'll check em in the shower tonight. It was all of a sudden random nut pain.

Catholic, eh? You're screwed either way, so you might as well ride.

When I was 22 I had no assets, I was in the Navy and I hated it and still had 4 years to go, and no women would even speak to me because I always smelled like the inside of a submarine. Started college at 26 so I was pretty much broke until I was 30.

But now I live in the best place in the world to ride a bike.

I was supposed to move in with my gf of 5 1/2 years in the fall, but she got cold feet. She dropped out of college and is living with her parents again. She says she wants her space, will barely talk to me, and cheated on me last week. I was seriously half a second away from buying this girl an engagement ring. I've decided to forgive her and still want to be with her, but she's not sure what the hell she wants at this point and this could take months to work out. I've skipped class for the past week because I can't concentrate, can only fall asleep in the living room of my house because I have memories of her sleeping with me in my bed, and have lost 10lbs because I haven't been able to make myself eat all that much. This is a 10 lb loss in the past week, mind you. And, I've been off my bike for 10 days now, because whenever I'm on my bike I think, and thinking is the last thing I want to do. Right now I'm driving myself crazy waiting for her to read an e-mail I wrote asking if I can drop off gifts for her and her family on easter. Right now, I'm a shell of a man.

I'm racing the battenkill roubaix in 2 weekends no matter what. If I can do it, you can do it.

go get em sucka.

go get em sucka.

http://www.passionet.co.uk/images/books/B000053VBC.jpg

It could be worse. You could be me :D

Start off the year fast, and able to handle volume...now not so much.
Got two knee surgeries, and now having random problems with patellar tendonitis and chrondomalacia that I wasn't before.
Stoplossed in a job I hate (at this point...)for an extra year in a crap-tacular town with paltry financial recompense.

I'm still going to race this year. Hell or high water man :)

Angelinia Jolie is never going to look at you as anything other than a creepy stalker.

She didn't look at me as a creepy stalker... Mind you, I am gorgeous.



;)

bdcheung, I keep reading the OP and still don't see anything that would keep you from riding/racing.


- I graduate college in a little over a month.
So you have an extra couple days of a graduation ceremony and maybe some time with the family. Probably some bike schwag gift certificates (read: cash) thrown in there too.


- After graduation I have to move, then start my new job.
Again, a few days off the bike (assuming you move yourself), and then you'll be filling your time with work instead of college.


- I'm moving to an area that isn't exactly biker friendly (in all aspects: driver awareness, route availability, road quality, etc.)
Herndon is not that different. I'm sure there are plenty of Herndonites who can give you route info. And you've still got the trainer/rollers.


- I still have a wedding (August 24) to plan. And a honeymoon.
Not only do you have time to ride while you're planning a wedding, but I recommend it. HIGHLY. If she rides, incorporate riding into the honeymoon. I have pics to prove that can really work.


- Every weekend from here to Graduation is booked with wedding stuff, job stuff, family stuff, etc.
Worst case, you put in an hour on the trainer in the wee hours of the morning. Still, I think if you compartmentalize this stuff a bit you'll find that you can still get a ride in.

Don't get discouraged. Just because your life is changing and it'll take a little time to fit your riding to your new life, it's far from impossible.

werd. I'd kill to be worrying about planning my wedding =P

I just needed to vent.

no worries, so did I :beer:

now go ride your bike!

I just needed to vent.

There are literally BILLIONS of people in the world who would love to have your "problems." By even posting on this board, we are sufficiently affluent to have a hobby that we can afford to spend money on. With that alone, we're very, very fortunate.

Go to NCSU. DOOO IT.

No, Catholic :) *hint hint wink wink nudge nudge*

Say no more.

Oh, and bdcheung, I don't know you, but you sound worried that you're creating a life you don't like. And if that's the case, you're right. Stop. It's easier now than later.

I don't mean the marriage and the job aren't right for you, or that you should ditch either or both. But you should set clear limits: make sure you have time for what you want to do. If you want to race, then explain that you're going to race.

And then your fi-ance will explain how life really works.

Good luck!

Yeah, it's frustrating.

I think it's time to start setting boundaries and expectations. At my last five jobs (in different industries) I have laid down the law, that I will ride at lunch. Don't schedule a lunch meeting, because I won't be there (unless it's really important). As it is now, I occasionally ride at lunch with one of our VPs (the one who got our logo on Disco kits ;) ), so cycling is becoming the "new golf," which is very convenient.

My wife and I have an economy of active time worked out really well. I don't do many long rides at this point, but I do get great frequency and quality ride time. She gets to run. Sometimes we have to bring kids in a trailer/stroller, but we get out there.

Don't bottle up your desire to race. Pick out a couple races, tell everyone you're going to do them, and go race. Nobody is going to disown you because you do four or five races between now and the end of the season. Maybe you can find a weeknight crit or TT series to quench your thirst?

I was supposed to move in with my gf of 5 1/2 years in the fall, but she got cold feet. She dropped out of college and is living with her parents again. She says she wants her space, will barely talk to me, and cheated on me last week. I was seriously half a second away from buying this girl an engagement ring. I've decided to forgive her and still want to be with her, but she's not sure what the hell she wants at this point and this could take months to work out. I've skipped class for the past week because I can't concentrate, can only fall asleep in the living room of my house because I have memories of her sleeping with me in my bed, and have lost 10lbs because I haven't been able to make myself eat all that much. This is a 10 lb loss in the past week, mind you. And, I've been off my bike for 10 days now, because whenever I'm on my bike I think, and thinking is the last thing I want to do. Right now I'm driving myself crazy waiting for her to read an e-mail I wrote asking if I can drop off gifts for her and her family on easter. Right now, I'm a shell of a man.

I'm racing the battenkill roubaix in 2 weekends no matter what. If I can do it, you can do it.

go get em sucka.

I really hate to say it, but judging from past experience.....you might wanna move on. When women suddenly get "confused" and "don't know what they want"....it usually means (9 times out of 10) that they don't have the guts to tell you to your face that they've moved/are moving on. If she cheated on you....I'd say that's not a real good sign. If you two do end up back together at some point, I would probably wonder how long things would last before she changes her mind again.

However....that may not necessarily be the case in this instance. Just some food for thought. Sorry dude.

Regarding this girl, I'd rather go down with the ship than head for a lifeboat :beer:

Lots of history behind this one GW, including a (relatively minor) slip up of my own years ago. Karma's a *****, homie. But, I've done enough wrong to know that everyone deserves a chance to make things right.

Everyone that knows our story thinks we're gonna wind up back together, its just gonna take time. That's the part that's drivin me crazy, I want it NOW.

We'll see what happens. If I drank, right now I'd be downing a couple of 6 packs...

If it makes you feel better, my balls hurt.

This makes me feel much better. Thank you.

I don't know what to say to either bdcheung or KP. They are both healthy, young, fortunate to get quality educations, have loved, are loved and have passion. I'd say that is pretty nice place to be. Either commit, quit or move on...just don't wallow in the poor me pool.

point taken

I heart Greg

I'd recommend having a kid or two as soon as possible. Maybe a honeymoon pregnancy?

--Steve (you're welcome!)

Let's see, getting out of college, girl that loves you, you have your health, you haven't had your head or legs blown off in Iraq like many other young men your age, etc. etc. And you're here looking for sympathy because you may have to put down amateur bicycle racing for a year or two @ age 22?

Sometimes I wish I could have my 40's back. But I never lose perspective of how lucky I am. I'm the luckiest guy here. Besides you I mean. And that's exactly how you should be looking at your life. You can race your bike until you're over 60. I plan to. I know some guys that do.

I'd say time is on your side kid. Lighten up. And irrespective of whether you can race your bike, you never have to stop RIDING your bike. As long as you can manage to keep that up and not get hit by a bus, you have no worries. You need to get a real understanding of what real problems can be. Which is a wonderful thing because it will make your 'problems' seem profoundly unproblematic. Unfortunately that process can be painful. Lance experienced it. Worked for him. Luckily it didn't kill him.

If you're very lucky you'll get a grip on this long before you have to go through a similar painful, horrible, life perspective altering experience. Easier said than done of course. If you think I'm an idiot now, you should have known me when I was 22. There may actually be hope for YOU. On the other hand both of us are here all the time, so maybe we're both fukced. Maybe you can get out of here alive. I don't think I ever will.

Y'all have put things into perspective very well. Thread over, I'll just sit in the corner with my tail betwixt my legs :(

Y'all have put things into perspective very well. Thread over, I'll just sit in the corner with my tail betwixt my legs :(

(John Belushi cheer up beer can against head crush face) Sorry BD, didn't mean to do that to you at all. We still love you.

And just think how much faster than ME you'll always be. Wait, think of something more encouraging than that. Think how much less insane than The Cypress you'll always be.

Think how much less insane than The Cypress you'll always be.

I heart you.

Things change as you go through life ... some things for the better ... some worse ... some just different. You should be happy that you're riding and racing now.

I'm 49, way too fat, and until 3 years ago hadn't been on a bike in 20 years. I've been riding with the club over the past 3 years ... I'll probably do 2500-3000 miles this year ... and I decided a few months ago that I'd do my first race when I turn 50 ... and I'll be spending the next 6 months losing some weight and working my butt off to get ready for it. I don't have expectations that I win anything ... I just want to compete, finish, and not get beat by some punk on a unicycle.

Looking back, I wish I'd started when I was your age. Taking a break for a summer won't be so bad. What WILL be bad is ... after you get married, you can kiss off any new bike gear for a while. That new washing machine and naugahyde lazyboy will need to come first.

Whenver I get this way, my GF would follow along for a while, nod knowingly in support, then stare at me for a couple of seconds and say, "Are you through yet?". That's always good for a laugh as it points out how my pitiful whining does nothing to create the results I want in life. Then I get on with it! Life always turns out the way it does and that's fine. You'll gather everything back up once you're through the transitions. :)

If you still fell a bit deflated after all that support then maybe you can heed this useful advice.....

http://i25.photobucket.com/albums/c85/Mezzabolicsteroids/rippy.png

:D ;)

No, Catholic :) *hint hint wink wink nudge nudge*

does that mean that you won't be doing a test ride?

I'd recommend having a kid or two as soon as possible. Maybe a honeymoon pregnancy?

--Steve (you're welcome!)

dark zimbo. http://forums.roadbikereview.com/images/smilies/devil.gif