General Cycling Discussion - BF Team in TdF?

Hey All

Having lurked for some considerable time before joining, I have the feeling that there is enough talent around here to assemble a pretty darned good list of personnel (at least as back-up and management) for a Tour de France team. And with TdF just around the corner (or over the next hill), I thought it would be good to see who you thought should, could, would be on that list.

Me? I figure that for TdF these days, the most important choice is a good doc. Well, cbhungry gets my vote there. Then the chief mechanic -- well who can go past Rev.Chuck. Web promotions master Joe, of course. Diet and nutrition RTWD. ChrisL as the sanity inspector. Aerobics Koffee...

I've run out of ideas.

What about a motivational coach, a top-notch organiser, team manager, massager of souls and bodies, and there must be a place for A.Troll there as entertainment director, too...

Let's go to it boys and girls and let your imaginations run wild (but nicely)!

R

Well our TdF team definitely needs some downhilling talent. You see those wimps taking the road down the Alps...? I bet KleinMP99 and some of da boyz could take the direct route and get us some surprise stage wins. The UCI doesn't forbid full-squishies, do they...? :confused:

Well, we know mechBgon would have to be part of the repair support team!

Me doing aerobics? Nah... I'd be the one checking biofeedback and yelling through the earplugs when they're recovered enough to push and when they're too bonked to attack, etc.

I'm all about the heart rate monitors....

I'll drive the support car, or hang off the back of a motorbike with a HUGE video camera :D how do those guys do it?!

Brendon
:beer:

I'll volenteer myself for the climbing/descending specialist, am I allowed to make contact in close quarters though?

Originally posted by mechBgon
I bet KleinMP99 and some of da boyz could take the direct route and get us some surprise stage wins. The UCI doesn't forbid full-squishies, do they...? :confused:


Well I better get off my fat ass and ride then!

Sorry about the first picture to anybody who didnt enjoy it, here is the real me ;)
http://misterhouse.net:81/public/eq/fat.jpg

:eek:

EEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!

Ok, I will have to throw out my dinner now... or throw up what I've already eaten!

One, two, three... flush our toilets together.

Yuck!!

I'll ride far back and keep an eye on the broom wagon...

Yucks, that's not you right?

Originally posted by Rowan

Let's go to it boys and girls and let your imaginations run wild (but nicely)!


Can I pilot the Twinstar?

Originally posted by Koffee Brown
:eek:

EEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!

Ok, I will have to throw out my dinner now... or throw up what I've already eaten!

Or give your dinner to the guy in the pic. I'm sure he'll know exactly what to do with it.

I saw that pic for the first time while I was eating my lunch (didn't really have time to respond). I actually found it amusing in a strange kind of way. :D

P.S How can I be sanity inspector? I don't know a thing about "sanity".

Myself & toolfreak will handle the alcoholic refreshments at the start , during ,finnish & after stage social's that we will have to have, OK .
:beer: :beer: :beer: :beer:

Chris you are soooo funny with your response to that picture and what Koffee Brown said, "you'll have to give your dinner to that guy in the picture, he'll know what to do with it!!:roflmao:

Great response there!!

Benjamin

i'd be happy to carry the water bottles and food up to the guys who were really pushing.
this is a fun idea thanks rowan :)

I can be the team's "Graham Watson" and document our road to glory. I've been wanting to cross over into cycling photography, what better place to start than the tour? I can pose as a moronic tourist with a camera and step out in front of cyclists who are threatening our lead. I would sacrifice my body for the cause! LOL.

I volunteer for musical director
(and it won't be all Buffett, I promise!).

can you say Mod Flanders Conspiriacy?
no, neither can I. :lol:


Marty

I take it we have no cyclists on the forum? ;)

Originally posted by Joe Gardner
I take it we have no cyclists on the forum? ;)

I'll bike Joe! I love to climb!:p

Although we would probably never win a stage. *sigh*:(

:D

Sounds good, I can hang in the back for the sprint... as long as we have a 30 mile stage, not a 130 mile stage ;)

I propose all us chicks do the cycling. We can use the distraction factor.

Originally posted by Natophelia
I propose all us chicks do the cycling. We can use the distraction factor.
In that case I want to be in the team car. . .
or maybe a spectator, no wait, I want to be a race official
you know, standing up in the sunroof making sure that
everything is UCI legal. :D

Marty

If it's gonna be all chicks I could do my part by being an official TdF groupie! :D :D :D

Originally posted by dragracer
If it's gonna be all chicks I could do my part by being an official TdF groupie! :D :D :D

Haha, I like the way your mind works.

If we do that, I can gaurantee publication of my photos!

Originally posted by Joe Gardner
I take it we have no cyclists on the forum? ;)

Count me in. I'll be the Lanterne Rouge! Whether I want to be or not. :)

I doubt that Le Tour needs an Underwear Nazi, but I could do the drug testing.


Underwear Nazi
Just pee in the cup, Lance.

Originally posted by Crack'n'fail
I can be the team's "Graham Watson" and document our road to glory. I've been wanting to cross over into cycling photography, what better place to start than the tour? I can pose as a moronic tourist with a camera and step out in front of cyclists who are threatening our lead. I would sacrifice my body for the cause! LOL.

Damn you beat me to it !!

Jeff

Originally posted by Joe Gardner
I take it we have no cyclists on the forum? ;)

I volunteered to race.

I'll be happy to do the domestique thing, plow the road for the boss, and occasionally lead-out. (Okay, just used up all my Tour terminology....)

Plus, I'm one of the JDs on this forum (LegalIce and FOG also come to mind) and the team'll need us when we get sued!

Originally posted by lotek
In that case I want to be in the team car. . .
or maybe a spectator, no wait, I want to be a race official
you know, standing up in the sunroof making sure that
everything is UCI legal. :D


Or you can ride in the Twinstar with me and have access to the REALLY POWERFUL LENS with gyrostabilisation. :D

Crack'n'fail, you're invited too for the still-work.

Count me out, I tore my rotator cuff in my right shoulder.

Danka, just today? Are you ok?

Today, I'm hurting like something else.

Dang dude, sounds like a good story... ;) I hope your not off the bike for too long.

Originally posted by danka24
Count me out, I tore my rotator cuff in my right shoulder.

How did it happen?

NOthing exciting, just crashed into a tree.

Originally posted by danka24
NOthing exciting, just crashed into a tree.

Ouch... hope you heal up soon.

I think that guy in Klein's picture passed me on an uphill riding a rusty old three speed with a wire basket.

I'll volunteer to lead the relaxation and meditation sessions before the race, and could even bring the oranges for snacks.

I want to be the Official Cheesecake Tester. Koffee Brown, I will need one of your homemade cheesecakes per week as a reference standard.

I'll be our KOM jersey contender, (anyone lighter than 145lbs)? :p

I don't know what KOM is, but I'm under 140. Will that get me free cheesecake too?

KOM = King of the Mountain(s) (at least thats what I think it stands for).

Originally posted by Natophelia
I don't know what KOM is, but I'm under 140. Will that get me free cheesecake too? Yes, once the cheesecake has passed stringent quality standards. Obviously we cannot have our riders eating anything but the best cheesecake during the TdF.

Oh the pressure to perform! :D

I will have to make sure my cheesecakes are of only the highest quality. We gotta have our guys eating only the best when they're chasing guys like Lance!

Do we have a preference as to what kind of cheesecake our guys would prefer, Mech? I'll have to leave the gourmet stuff up to you.

Nothing but cheesecake, coffee and beer for our guys for the entire tour! ;)

Nothing but cheesecake, coffee and beer for our guys for the entire tour!

Now I'm convinced that I should be a part of this. I'm not sure what I can do for the team, but I definitely have to be present for the cheesecake, coffee and beer.

Originally posted by Koffee Brown
Do we have a preference as to what kind of cheesecake our guys would prefer, Mech? I'll have to leave the gourmet stuff up to you.Well, I'm not sure. What substances does the UCI consider to be legal performance enhancers? For example, is it UCI-legal to add cherry pie filling on top of the cheesecake...? Maybe there's a threshold amount that's ok, like they have for caffeine.

I don't want them springing a surprise raid on us and disqualifying us for cheesecake-doping. Our sponsors expect us to maintain sterling ethics and avoid scandal (don't they, Joe? ;)).

Originally posted by VegasCyclist
I'll be our KOM jersey contender, (anyone lighter than 145lbs)? :p

I'm about 61kg or so, which I believe translates to around 125lbs. I'll have a crack at the KOM jersey, too. Between us we should just about have it nailed, right?

is there such a thing as Chocolate Cheesecake?

Brendon
:beer: