Foo - Yooper Airlines

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View Full Version : Yooper Airlines


Tom Stormcrowe
08-15-07, 08:19 PM
Yooper Airlines

We Are Pleased To Announce Yooper Air Is Now Operating In Minnysota.
Also Serving Visconsin, Nort And Sout Dakota.

If you are travelin soon, consider Yooper Air, da no-frills airline. You're all in da same boat on Yooper Air, where flyin is a upliftin experience. Dere is no first class on any Yooper Air flight.

Meals are potluck. Rows 1-6, bring rolls; 7-15, bring a salad; 16-21, a main dish, and 22-30, a dessert. Basses and tenors please sit in da rear of da aircraft.

Everyone is responsible for his or her own baggage. All fares are by free will offering and da plane will not land 'til da budget is met.

Pay attention to your flight attendant, who will acquaint you wit da safety system aboard dis Yooper Air. Okay den, lis ten up. I'm only gonna say dis vonce. In da event of a sudden loss of cab in pressure, I am frankly going to be real surprised and so vill Captain Olson, because we fly right around two tousand feet, so loss of cabin pressure vould probably mean da Second Coming or someting of dat nature, and I vouldn't bodar with doze liddle masks on da rubber tubes. You're gonna have bigger tings to worry about den dat. Just stuff doze back up in dair little holes. Probably da masks fell out because of turbulence which, to be honest wit you, we're going to have quite a bit of at two tousand feet, sorta like driving across a plowed field, but after a while you get used to it.

In da event of a water landing, I'd say forget it. Start saying da Lord's Prayer and just hope you get to da part about forgive us our sins as we forgive doze who sin against us, which some people say 'trespass against us,' which isn't right, but what can you do?

Da use of cell phones on da plane is strictly forbidden, not because daymay confuse da plane's navigation system, which is seat of da pants all da way. No, it's because cell phones are a pain in da wazoo, and if God meant you to use a cell phone, He would have put your mout on da side of your head.

We start lunch right about noon and it's buffet style with da coffee pot up front.

Den we'll have da hymn sing; hymnals are in da seat pocket in front of you. Don't take yours wit you when you go or I am going to be real upset and I am not kiddin !

Right now I'll say Grace: 'Come, Lord Jesus, be our guest and let deze gifts to us be blessed. Fadar,Son, and Holy Ghost, may we land in Dulut or pretty close.'
Amen

p.s. To understand this ~ it really helps if you are from Michigan........Ya. eh?


Taerom
08-15-07, 08:21 PM
We don't sound anything like that.

Tom Stormcrowe
08-15-07, 08:25 PM
We don't sound anything like that.

Some of ya do! Dere around Marquette and in da back country!;)


Krink
08-15-07, 08:29 PM
Yah hey dere. Is da fare payable in smelt?

CycleMagic
08-15-07, 08:35 PM
LOL!!!

Ok, back to reading.....this is funny! I've got characters from Fargo running through my head....yahhh.

Tom Stormcrowe
08-15-07, 08:38 PM
Ya, you betcha!

Krink
08-15-07, 08:47 PM
Ya den I'll pay with da smelt. Dey don't call me da big dipper for nothin, eh? Dere all canned real nice but she'd want da jars back, doncha know. I can go store and get somethin to put dem in.

AllenG
08-15-07, 08:48 PM
We don't sound anything like that.

Now you know how Southerners feel.

Bionic Pammy
08-15-07, 10:34 PM
Oh, come on yous guys. You left out da part bout passin da dish for lunch, dontcha know. Geez, do us girls hafta tink of everyting?
Ya know, da UP is really part of Sconsin, but we won't fight yous guys for it.
Ya know, when I was younger I was told to bring a dish ta pass. I brought an empty one so I could get er filled up. I tink you was supposed to bring a full one. Anyways, dats what everyone else did. I guess I had da Arby's all over my face, eh?

Tom Stormcrowe
08-15-07, 10:49 PM
And dis here is what they are playin' on da headphones during da flight!
http://www.mp3.com/albums/215068/summary.html?tag=albums;title;4&om_act=convert&om_clk=artalb

Bionic Pammy
08-15-07, 10:58 PM
Ya know, I got dat CD. It's so funny we almost fall off da buckets laffin!

billew
08-16-07, 09:31 AM
Ya know it's really funny dat i had me a yooper roomate back a ways an he tole me all about da pastys.
And one day I'm in da record store in Rhode Island and dere is a yoopers cd funny as all get out I tell ya.:D

billew
08-16-07, 09:31 AM
Ya know it's really funny dat i had me a yooper roomate back a ways an he tole me all about da pastys.
And one day I'm in da record store in Rhode Island and dere is a yoopers cd funny as all get out I tell ya.:D

trsidn
08-16-07, 09:49 AM
LOL!!!

Ok, back to reading.....this is funny! I've got characters from Fargo running through my head....yahhh.

Yahhh... I was thinkin' Fargo m'self:)

Bionic Pammy
08-16-07, 09:55 AM
You betcha, we're kindred spirits wit dat Margie ya know...

trsidn
08-16-07, 09:57 AM
I can just picture this thread spinning off into Fargo quotes....

*must..... control..... fingers......*

jsharr
08-16-07, 09:59 AM
Is Garrison Keeler painted on the nose of your aircraft?

Falkon
08-16-07, 10:33 AM
a be bop a re bop a rhubarb pie?

jsharr
08-16-07, 10:35 AM
Sure, would love some. Want a Powder Milk biscuit?

smitchri
08-16-07, 10:57 AM
We don't sound anything like that.

You haven't moved away yet! I used to say the same thing, but you DO!