Living Car Free - Car Free Dating Experience

Last week I was out with a woman I'd been seeing for a few years. It finally dawned on her. She exclaimed: "So you're not poor! You ride around on that old bike. You don't have a car. You don't have a big house. How could I tell?" I don't know what she'd been thinking. I never complained about lack of money. I guess she thought I was making a big sacrifice for her when I bought good tickets to shows or fancy restaurant meals. Car free people don't emit some of the normal American signals for "not poor".

Yeah, the girl that I'm seeing had assumed that I was poor when she first saw me on a Friday, because I was carrying my bike into the elevator and was wearing jeans and a T-shirt. Then, the more she saw me around, teh more she noticed that I "looked fancy, smelled fancy and seemed to always be with fancy people." She was convinced I wasn't broke when I took her to dinner at her favorite restaurant. (although I was broke after that)

I think it's genuinely unforatunate that so much status is determined by what people drive. I do have a car, a Toyota Yaris, but I certainly don't think of it as a status symbol.

Wimmenz DNA makes them look for evidence of resources for supporting the brood that they want to make. That's the sad fact of it. OK, I guess I'm going to get pummeled now.

Well gwd, you could wear an expensive watch and other jewelry. You could pin copies of your Charles Schwab brokerage statements to your bike jersey.

Wimmenz DNA makes them look for evidence of resources for supporting the brood that they want to make. That's the sad fact of it. OK, I guess I'm going to get pummeled now.

Well gwd, you could wear an expensive watch and other jewelry. You could pin copies of your Charles Schwab brokerage statements to your bike jersey.

It's more so with younger women. In my 30's it seemed like most all women wanted outward symbols of success.

But now that I'm in my 50s, the bicycle is a positive symbol. That I can ride 70 miles in a day says that I'm not a couch potato. But I make a point of insisting on paying for dinners, as they do the driving. I point out that the cost of the gas may be as much as the cost of the dinner, so its equal. I want them to see me as sensible with my money, but generous where it counts. (spending it on them).

Nice thing about living in NYC is almost everybody is car free here and most people don't have cars. (I guess being able to afford to live in Manhattan is proof enough that you can, as Kf5nd so eloquently puts it, afford to support a brood).

I did go on a blind date once with a girl from Westchester who drove her SUV into the City. I remember how much trouble we had trying to find her a place to park.

The car spoiled the whole date because since she had to drive we couldn't drink! So instead of going to a bar we got ice cream. :rolleyes:

Needless to say the date did not go well. As Ogen Nash said, Candy is Dandy but Liquor is Quicker!

How people in car country can date without drinking is beyond me.

Nice thing about living in NYC is almost everybody is car free here and most people don't have cars. (I guess being able to afford to live in Manhattan is proof enough that you can, as Kf5nd so eloquently puts it, afford to support a brood).

I did go on a blind date once with a girl from Westchester who drove her SUV into the City. I remember how much trouble we had trying to find her a place to park.

The car spoiled the whole date because since she had to drive we couldn't drink! So instead of going to a bar we got ice cream. :rolleyes:

Needless to say the date did not go well. As Ogen Nash said, Candy is Dandy but Liquor is Quicker!

How people in car country can date without drinking is beyond me.

What's wrong with going out for ice cream? *boggles*

How people in car country can date without drinking is beyond me.

One of the great philosophical questions of our age. I found in college that people had a lot more fun at parties that involved drinking, but that most of them never got in the least drunk. There's something about a drink in hand that indicates you're fully off the leash, free to unwind, in a way that an ice cream cone doesn't. It's like alcohol is a catalyst for a good time. The problem is when people use it as a substitute for a good time....

The good news in your story is that this woman has been seeing you over several years while thinking you are poor. She has enough character to look for character in you rather than signs of wealth on you. She may be a keeper. Supposedly, one of the things women do use as a quick gauge of a man is a decent wristwatch. Who da thunk it?

Women do look for security. Young women who look for signs of wealth probably lack some character, themselves, and are not yet keepers, if they will be one day.

Someone said, "Men marry women hoping they will never change, but they always do. Women marry men hoping they will change, but they never do." Women have a thing about 'potential.' They think about what they can make you into. Find someone who is happy with you the way you are now.

If a relationship needs alcohol for fuel, it will likely run out of gas before long.

Hmm. When my wife and I were dating, I was poor. And broke. And unemployed. And living with my parents. And she drove everywhere we went because I didn't have a car. Dang, I must have been hot.

Edit: Oh, the wristwatch. That must have been it. I had a nice watch.

She may be a keeper.



We'll see.

Just look at how the majority of the country sees us.
I took this from another forum where a girl was asking for advice about when she ran into her ex at a club and he harrassed her.........

" So we walk to our car, and the guy and his buddy (one of the ones who shoved me) start riding their bicycles behind us

-----------

First mistake: dating a guy that does not own a car, or a guy with friends, that do not own cars. As much as i know I will get flack for this, it spells "poor loser". as does the behavior. Very "I am 14". A bicycle, at a club. Good lord!"

A bicycle, at a club. Good lord!"

Hey! I've gone to nice clubs with dress codes and all, by bike, with car free
girlfriends or met up with car dependent friends. We've had fun. The
car dependent people had to deal with Valet parking and all that and worrying
about not drinking too much.

Hmm. When my wife and I were dating, I was poor. And broke. And unemployed. And living with my parents. And she drove everywhere we went because I didn't have a car. Dang, I must have been hot.

Edit: Oh, the wristwatch. That must have been it. I had a nice watch. Or she liked you for your legs.

Hey! I've gone to nice clubs with dress codes and all, by bike, with car free
girlfriends or met up with car dependent friends. We've had fun. The
car dependent people had to deal with Valet parking and all that and worrying
about not drinking too much.

I worry just as much about not drinking too much, or maybe even more, if I'm taking the bike out.

I worry just as much about not drinking too much, or maybe even more, if I'm taking the bike out.


You would rather drive drunk than ride drunk?

People still think that car-free means poor?

I would've figured they thought it meant virgin?

You would rather drive drunk than ride drunk?

Don't have a car anymore. But I def. don't ride if I have more than 3-4 in me, and I generally try not to ride if I know I'm going to have more than 2, I'll walk it or catch a ride with a friend for those evenings.

Back when I had a car, there was a few times when I was stupid enough to drive when I perhaps shouldn't have been, and I remeber it being easier than the once or twice I've done it on my bike.

People still think that car-free means poor?

I would've figured they thought it meant virgin?

How about a poor virgin looser?

It is amazing how our pop culture is constantly putting down the bicycle as a viable means of transportation. So many movies and television shows present people who ride bikes as loosers who cannot get laid or afford a car. lame.....

Don't have a car anymore. But I def. don't ride if I have more than 3-4 in me, and I generally try not to ride if I know I'm going to have more than 2, I'll walk it or catch a ride with a friend for those evenings.

Back when I had a car, there was a few times when I was stupid enough to drive when I perhaps shouldn't have been, and I remeber it being easier than the once or twice I've done it on my bike.

herein lies the problem, when you are drunk it is easy to get behind the wheel and turn the key, but when you are drunk and trying to ride your bike maybe you can't even do it http://www.metacafe.com/watch/35650/drunk_cyclist/

Funny vid!

I worry just as much about not drinking too much, or maybe even more, if I'm taking the bike out.

One of my car free girlfriends told me that when she was younger she once drank too much to ride so she had to walk the bike home. I guess I don't drink to that point. I think you're much less likely to hurt someone else if you do something dumb on a bike than in a car. What I worry about coming home from a night out is the drunk car drivers who might hit me. If I'm on a date weather by bike or walking or taxi or car it doesn't seem like a good policy to drink so much I can't ride a bike. I mean what if my date wants to have sex? Sex is better sober. If I've had too many to ride a bike I probably won't put in a very good performance between the sheets. I've heard tell that some uptight religious nuts can't get it on without having a few drinks as an excuse, but does any one need so many they can't ride a bike before they can loosen up enough to get naked with a girlfriend? I think not. Correct me if I'm wrong.

There must be a car free word for being so drunk you can't ride a bike.

People still think that car-free means poor?

I would've figured they thought it meant virgin?

"Hope you got a big trunk, cause I'm putting my bike in it!":D

Don't have a car anymore. But I def. don't ride if I have more than 3-4 in me, and I generally try not to ride if I know I'm going to have more than 2, I'll walk it or catch a ride with a friend for those evenings.

Back when I had a car, there was a few times when I was stupid enough to drive when I perhaps shouldn't have been, and I remeber it being easier than the once or twice I've done it on my bike.

Jeez, now I feel like a complete ass. I love to ride drunk. Just a few weeks ago I had about 15 beers in four hours, then rode my bike home. Man, that was a GREAT time!

Jeez, now I feel like a complete ass. I love to ride drunk. Just a few weeks ago I had about 15 beers in four hours, then rode my bike home. Man, that was a GREAT time!

Sometimes I ride better than I walk drunk. It's nice having momentum on your side. I do remember one time I was way to drunk to be riding though; I got home safe, but I made my beater live up to its name. I rode off a ledge to get to the bike-rack :O

Riding a bike drunk can still land you in the same legal trouble as a DUI/DWI. Remember that your bike is considered a vehicle and is supposed to follow the rules of the road, of which, driving while intoxicated is a fairly serious offense.

And sex after a few drinks is way more fun than sober. You'll find that most girls are alot crazier in bed after they had a few drinks to loosen up their inhibitions. Now sex while completely wasted is a different story...you might not remember it and where is the fun in that?

Riding a bike drunk can still land you in the same legal trouble as a DUI/DWI. Remember that your bike is considered a vehicle and is supposed to follow the rules of the road, of which, driving while intoxicated is a fairly serious offense.

I am of the opinion that a cop would have to be having a really bad day, or you have to be doing something extremely stupid (see above vid) for a cop to actually give you a DUI. There is always that friend of a friend who has been busted, but i do not personally know anyone.

Riding a bike drunk can still land you in the same legal trouble as a DUI/DWI. Remember that your bike is considered a vehicle and is supposed to follow the rules of the road, of which, driving while intoxicated is a fairly serious offense.

And sex after a few drinks is way more fun than sober. You'll find that most girls are alot crazier in bed after they had a few drinks to loosen up their inhibitions. Now sex while completely wasted is a different story...you might not remember it and where is the fun in that?
I've biked right through a few of those sobriety check points without being asked for a breath sample. Not wasted but probably over the limit. Well that time after the office Christmas party years ago maybe... I remember pedaling by and waving to the cops thinking "I'm REALLY glad I'm not driving a car.".

I meant sex when you've had too many to bike but I have to say, my favorite sex romps have been sober with sober women. The craziest so far was this good Muslim girl who never drank. I'm not advocating not drinking with your date just not getting too drunk. I understand about loosening up. This one girl likes to take me dancing and I'm more comfortable after a couple drinks.

I probably had a car-ful dating experience with my sweetie, but the address was the license plate.

I've always been car-lite, and lived a couple years car free while my step-sisters had my car.
While my eyebrows raise when I see a guy tooling around town with a BMX (thinking: kid bike, not mature guy) I know what some bikes can go for (see Uno cycles in Littleton CO) and the alternative mindset is as sexy as the legs.
Bob Weir, in his 60s has great legs from cycling.

I know folks who have gotten DUIs while pedaling. Norman, Okla, on game day is an evil place.

We ARE traffic, and we have the same responsibilities as cagers.

How do you guys get girls in the first place if you only got bikes? I drive a high-end late-model luxury coupe (Infiniti G35) and I'm single. :(

It's not about the car.

How do you guys get girls in the first place if you only got bikes? I drive a high-end late-model luxury coupe (Infiniti G35) and I'm single. :(

Have you considered going after women that will care about something other than blatant false-status-symbols? Chrome and leather only go so far on a bike or a car; What you need to do is make yourself more interesting by breaking out of your shell, not hiding inside of one.

How do you guys get girls in the first place if you only got bikes? I drive a high-end late-model luxury coupe (Infiniti G35) and I'm single. :(

This wasn't meant to be a serious post, right? I'd figure that most women would be intelligent enough to actually go for interesting guys instead of the ones who LOOK rich. Of course, if you're living in L.A., I can understand, having experienced that area most of my life ;)

If your post was serious, then um, sorry :o

We'll see.Think about it for a few more years :)

Have you considered going after women that will care about something other than blatant false-status-symbols? Chrome and leather only go so far on a bike or a car; What you need to do is make yourself more interesting by breaking out of your shell, not hiding inside of one.

Chrome and leather on a bike? Hot. Cars, not so much. I'm imagining some fancy custom lugged frame with a well-worn brooks and those shiny hammered fenders. I don't care if the guy's a total d-bag, if he rode a bike like that... oh man.

Just sayin'

How do you guys get girls in the first place if you only got bikes? I drive a high-end late-model luxury coupe (Infiniti G35) and I'm single. :(

I think my social life improved after going car free. It must be a combination of factors, living in a denser part of town closer to social or interesting events, being more healthy, having more money and time to go out.... The car might be a barrier to women getting to know you.

The car might be a barrier to women getting to know you.

This reminds me of something I've been wondering: Why are tinted windows supposed to be sexy? Since when is being unseen sexy? (cause I think it's creepy)

'cause he's dangerous (oooohhhh)

actually, the idea that people couldn't see in, no matter what the occupants were doing, so sexy in a Sammy-Johns-singing-Chevy-Van kind of way.
which isn't, to me.

How do you guys get girls in the first place if you only got bikes? I drive a high-end late-model luxury coupe (Infiniti G35) and I'm single. :(
Uh, Spaceman, if you get a date because of your high-end late-model luxury coupe, will she dump you for the guy with the Lambourghini?

How about a poor virgin looser?

It is amazing how our pop culture is constantly putting down the bicycle as a viable means of transportation. So many movies and television shows present people who ride bikes as loosers who cannot get laid or afford a car. lame.....

Haha I was just thinking about that couple of days ago. In Heartbreak kid they ram a nice Cannondale into a concrete post thing majig when the couple tried to kiss. Specialized in the background when Ben Stiller's father was emberassing his son in-front of a hot possible date.

In Catch and Release *god awful rich urban romance film, everyone were riding Trek...and the poor girl had to use one to chase down her fiancé's ex-gf..who had a kid..behind her back.

Although there are some terrific movies involving bikes....they are still the loosing end of it all:

- The Bicycle Thief: Probably the worse one of all....guy completely looses and his son has to watch his father getting disgraced by the rest of the populace for stealing another bike.

- Transformers: Sam had to chase his yellow Camaro on his sister’s pink Trek I think it was? I think that’s down right degrading :P

- Triplettes of Belleville:.........well cyclist gets captured….