Foo - Best(or worst) he** on earth job stories

I don't know if this has been done before or not, but just wanted to know if you had any stories of working in sh**ty positions, or being a customer and having to deal with double digit IQ's. I'm sure most of us had to work some sort of crap job at some point in your life, and there is sure to be a tale or two.
Mine: I worked for the Home Depot years ago, biggest mistake of my life.
-one guy would write "i'm deaf" on his apron and work his entire shift like that
-one guy would use the darth vader voice on the paging system
-same guy would also do the beavis/butthead "cornholio" voice on PA
-seasonal dept guy would hollow out a skid of peat moss then sleep there for half his shift

We also used to take pizza dough & wrap the steering wheel and gearshift of this manager we hated at the pizza shop I worked at. Or run into his office and blast him with a super-soaker.

I worked as first level phone support, trying to keep the photo centers of a major retail chain online.

I'd get old people who would freak out when I'd dial in and start checking stuff on their computers.

I'd get stupid people who couldn't find the computer. I spent 40 minutes with a girl, explaining exactly where the computer was.
'Go to the screen, is it on top of a cabinet?
good, now open the bottom door of the cabinet, the computer will be on it's side
No, the bottom door of the cabinet
No, what you just described is a cable, not a computer
No, once again, thats the cable, the computer will be roughly 1.5 feet by 8 inches, and black
Yes, I know what you found is black, but it's a cable, not a computer'

Etc, etc, etc, until I told her I'd call back when someone else was there. That second person found it in about 30 seconds.
'OH, the bottom of the cabinet, yah it's right here, I have no idea what was wrong with the morning shift person'

I took a job as a moderator on a bicycle forum. Oh, and I don't get paid.

More Home Depot goodies:

-if anyone knows about the home depot "cheer", you know what i'm talking about. We had this one old biker working with us, a right surly old coot. He refused to do the cheer. He would walk away and tell the store manager to go take a f'ing hike.

-We used to have forklift races behind the store, those were pretty fun

-The lunchroom at HD had couches. Baadddd idea. We used to work the early shift,(5AM-2PM) and I bet that 4 out of 5 days I would be asleep on them. A manager would actually have to come find me and tell me to get back to work...

I troll a liberal website, it's hard to sit on the fence and poke and prod enough to keep conversation going with out creating a back lash of people just insulting me (from the regulars, or the other trolls) It's a fine line I walk.

I took a job as a moderator on a bicycle forum. Oh, and I don't get paid.

I know da feeling, except I get to do it in P&R! :eek:

Actually, the worst job I ever has for hellish conditions was pulling Kimberlite crushers (Diamond Mining equipment) from Capetown, S.A. to Zaire. Great pay, but nasty conditions!

While in high school, I work in an autoparts/garage. I would stake the hundreds of oil cases into a little maze so I could eat my lunch in peace, and when the shop slowed down, I'd go relax and not have to worry about 'looking busy'.

I know da feeling, except I get to do it in P&R! :eek:

Actually, the worst job I ever has for hellish conditions was pulling Kimberlite crushers (Diamond Mining equipment) from Capetown, S.A. to Zaire. Great pay, but nasty conditions!

How high in the air did you have to pull them?

you got the pebble that time squegeeboo

How high in the air did you have to pull them?

Huh? I was hauling them on a Tractor Trailer! I was an Equipment hauler for DeBeers South African-Central African Operations and Logistics Div.

Huh? I was hauling them on a Tractor Trailer! I was an Equipment hauler for DeBeers South African-Central African Operations and Logistics Div.

Beers and flying? Man, air-traffic regulations must have been much more lax back in the day.

Zaire, the air, play on words Tom!

Zaire, the air, play on words Tom!

And to think, I almost went with 'how high did you have to pull them to hit French airspace' (Ze Air) that may have ended even worse.

http://www.maths.leeds.ac.uk/%7Ekersale/Pictures/monty-python.jpg

Only held 2 jobs.

My first job, manager for my dads ice cream distributorship was pretty cool because I could chill in the coldstore at -30 degrees C and get outside and be at 40degreesC. Plus I had unlimited supply of ice-cream and I was 17 :D. I am not a big fan of ice cream now though. A little bit of an overdose.


My current job is pretty damn cool as well.

Zaire, the air, play on words Tom!

Too subtle, I guess ;)

I actually have some pretty good stories from that job, but it's a guarantee they wouldn't be believed.:eek:

I actually have some pretty good stories from that job, but it's a guarantee they wouldn't be believed.:eek:

Oh come on.. Lets hear it!

Well, I got to try Smoked Rat on a Stick, and it actually tastes pretty good :eek:
http://static.flickr.com/117/314729404_9edfbf6f03_m.jpg

Only held 2 jobs. manager for my dads ice cream distributorship was pretty cool .

ice cream / cool ; i see what you did there!

Old man just got a new computer. The person he bought it from plugged everything in, then gave him my phone number to get him set up for internet access.

Took 10 minutes to get the computer turned on.... He keeps telling me that nothing is happening.... finally figured out that he never turned on the monitor. *sighs*

Couldn't figure out how to use the mouse... after 20 minutes of trying to explain the difference between the left and right mouse buttons I finally told him I'd have to have another tech give him a call.... I promptly told my boss that he could shove his job. (I hated the job and the boss, anyway)

ice cream / cool ; i see what you did there!

I would have my dog lick it off too..

Once, I listened to my boss try and walk a woman through some issues, he spent roughly 20 minutes trying to get her to type in a command of some sort or another.

He finally had her read it back character by character. She had spelled out ampersand.

Also, lawyers were the worst people to support, "I'm a lawyer, so I'm clearly not an idiot, stop talking to me like one" followed promptly by something along the lines of (and this one actually did happen) "What do you mean my desktop? I thought were using my computer, my desktop is clear except for some pens and a legal pad"

-one guy would write "i'm deaf" on his apron and work his entire shift like that
-seasonal dept guy would hollow out a skid of peat moss then sleep there for half his shift



Those dudes should have gotten a raise for being awesome. :D

I took a job as a moderator on a bicycle forum. Oh, and I don't get paid.

I'll take your job instead of you.
I promise I'll go a great job ;)

PM Brian Maximan

Can you give a letter of recommendation?

Can you give a letter of recommendation?

F


there you go

For many years I've been a project or operations manager in construction, building/grounds services, and various systems installations. And not to break my arm patting myself on the back but I'm very good at what I do. A few years ago a old friend called and wanted me to take a job running the field operations of a security systems company he and his wife own. I had known the couple and the business for many years (him since 3rd grade) and was looking to change jobs at the time anyway. Little did I know what I was getting into. The two were so dead set on everything, and I mean every little thing, being done just exactly the way they had been doing it for 20 years that I had no authority at all. However, everything that ever went wrong was 100% my fault. Then once during a storm a client (a casino) had their camera system go down and paged me. I sent the guy we had on call to fix the problem. My bosses blew up because I didn't call them to ask who to send. WHAT DID THEY HIRE ME FOR!!!!!!! From that point on I got the cold shoulder from both of them. They simply didn't talk to me unless it was absolutely necessary and then only what had to be said unless it was about something else to chew me about, then it might go on for some time. I have never been so belittled and miserable in my life. I actually went home and cried many times in the last couple of months I was there. One of the happiest days of my life was cleaning out my desk when I left.

Maximan1 is awsome and he should be a mod.
He'd make a really good mod, banning all the bad people and stuff. I think I'll retire from my mod postition because I'm already tired of all this. Brain, make Max a mod :)

there you go

Fixed ;) I saw a few spelling and grammer errors.
All better now.

Fixed ;) I saw a few spelling and grammer errors.
All better now.

The letter e is contained twice in the word awesome. The letter a occurs twice in grammar. You failed the test and I rescind my letter of reccomendation.

Most of mine were from when i was a kid. Seems child slavery was not only legal but common.

One old farmer hired my brother and I to be the rats in his chemically treated grain bin while it was augered out from the bottom. We were told to climb up the side and down onto the pile of grain through a little hole in the top of the bin.

There was about 3 cubic feet of dust and chemical filled air. Then our job was to climb out against the sidewalls of the bin and push the grain to the center with our hands/feet or whatever else we could find. We did this for two solid days. I remember my lungs were so full of crap after the first day that my lungs rattled when i breathed, and they hurt like hell.

Nobody gave a rat's ass however, and we were told to proceed. Had several similar jobs like that. My it was fun being a kid. :rolleyes:

The letter e is contained twice in the word awesome. The letter a occurs twice in grammar. You failed the test and I rescind my letter of reccomendation.

You can't do that :(

When I was in the military my supervisors decided that the 'solution' to us failing a reactor safety inspection was for us to stay down in the plant until 6 PM everyday cleaning while we were in port...

My response? Climb down from the upper level and sleep on top of a 24" steam pipe... (With all the insulation, it was more like 36" across and pretty comfy)

A 2 or 3 hour nap every afternoon sure made it easier to stay up late every night. ;)

Squeegee broom pusher in a slaughterhouse, sweeping the offal into a trough in the floor, during the Summer, FTW.

Squeegee broom pusher in a slaughterhouse, sweeping the offal into a trough in the floor, during the Summer, FTW.

I'm a kind of broom?

Kinky.

Some pranks we used to pull on the new kids at the pie shop:

-sent the new kids to the basement for dough. They'd come back, sometimes after twenty minutes or more saying they can't find the stairs :rolleyes: to which we told them dough has to be cool, or it goes bad...

-tell them to go next door to the hair salon for the pizza screens :roflmao:

-we'd send them to an address across the street and see how long it took them to figure it out. One young lad was gone for an hour and a half before calling the office line. We told him "well, we can't see you, can you see us?" we then told him to jump up and down to get our attention. I just about pissed myself from laughter.

ahh, pickin' on the young'uns...