Foo - Alone time away from spouse / SO

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ManBearPig
11-28-07, 12:56 PM
Outdated.
If a friend calls and asks me to go somewhere, I clear it with her first. She does the same for me. She probably socializes more with friends, I use my alone time to ride, etc.
ModoVincere
11-28-07, 01:00 PM
I basically get "alone" time about every 2 or 3 months. That's about how often I do something that pisses her off enough that I get to be by myself.
ManBearPig
11-28-07, 01:01 PM
Outdated.
Everyone needs time apart to do other things. No matter how compatible you are, there are going to be things that each of you like to do indepentant of the other. Mine are riding and watching sports with the guys, and going to see live music acts.
barndoor
11-28-07, 01:07 PM
It is imperative that a spouse gets some alone or away time! I go on a golf trip every spring with the guys.....and when I come back, things are always a little better than before I went away... :)
I also value my bike time......it's nice to go away for a while and then come back .... keeps things "fresh", I suppose!
Me wifey and m/i/l are away right now....so barndoor and his pooch are having some Bruce Lee movie nights this week! Hyyyyyahhhhh! :)
I will try to answer your question next year Towlie. Right now I only get to spend two hours a day with my SO on Yahoo and she will not be here by Christmas.
As jscharr mentioned everyone needs time apart. The amount of time varies on the person and relationship.
Just get a job, or say that your job requires you to be on call on the weekend, as mine does. Whenever a weekend trip to the in-laws comes up, just say your on call that weekend and encourage them to go. It gets me a couple of weekends a year. I have never had to lie about being on call, since I am quite a bit.
We give eachother lots of personal time and its such a lifesaver. With busy careers and young kids, keeping in touch with your own identity is essential.
blonduathlongrl
11-28-07, 01:20 PM
we have done every hobbies together as a couple for a long time.
but when you are with someone for 20 years people grow and change and become themselves and now we both understand that what one might enjoy doesnt have to be shared by the other since we are own person and enjoy different things.
Our hobbies are our time alone, we respect each other enough to give each other time alone doing the things/hobbie we pick as individuals.
that's not only our time away ( which I think is good) but it's our time when we have the chance to grow as individuals.
Keep in mind, we also run a business together as well as raising a family together. It's really OK to have some time apart. We would be killing each other!:p
Maelstrom
11-28-07, 01:31 PM
Hell yes. I have been with my fiance for 7ish years. While in a loving relationship we are both very personal at times, we both take our time alone, we both need it, and it makes use appreciate each other more.
-VELOCITY-
11-28-07, 01:43 PM
Well I've been happily married for almost 13 years, just wanted to make that clear first, and although I occasionally go out with some friends of mine, and she does the same, although less frequently than I, I honestly can say that with the exception of my riding time, I don't really need any other alone time. I guess I'm weird like that. But I got married to BE with my wife, not because it was the next logical step in my life. I really don't understand the concept of actually wanting to be alone. I can see getting away with her and leaving the kids with family, but I really don't enjoy being out without her. Honestly. And no I'm not whipped or brainwashed.
ModoVincere
11-28-07, 01:45 PM
Honestly. And no I'm not whipped or brainwashed.
She's right behind you reading over your shoulder, isn't she :p
-VELOCITY-
11-28-07, 01:47 PM
She's right behind you reading over your shoulder, isn't she :p
Nope. I'm at work.
She's right behind you reading over your shoulder, isn't she :p
pwned :D
-VELOCITY-
11-28-07, 01:54 PM
pwned :D
incorrect!
ModoVincere
11-28-07, 01:54 PM
just kidding there velocity.
-VELOCITY-
11-28-07, 01:55 PM
just kidding there velocity.
I know. :D
I knew it would be a tough crowd though. No worries.
Nope. I'm at work.
you work with your wife? :p
sorry could not resist.
-VELOCITY-
11-28-07, 01:57 PM
you work with your wife? :p
sorry could not resist.
Nope. Although we used to work together. :p
Maelstrom
11-28-07, 02:00 PM
Well I've been happily married for almost 13 years, just wanted to make that clear first, and although I occasionally go out with some friends of mine, and she does the same, although less frequently than I, I honestly can say that with the exception of my riding time, I don't really need any other alone time. I guess I'm weird like that. But I got married to BE with my wife, not because it was the next logical step in my life. I really don't understand the concept of actually wanting to be alone. I can see getting away with her and leaving the kids with family, but I really don't enjoy being out without her. Honestly. And no I'm not whipped or brainwashed.
I see the point, but for me personally, don't understand. I can't be with anyone that much. Riding would also be something I consider alone time, but I still need time for introspection, I can't do that with outside distractions. Riding doesn't give me that opportunity as I am usually avoiding trees.
I am not talking about a constant thing either, once a month or so I need a night to myself, without friends, family etc. Heck when i lived with my family, I needed that time.
Yup, the boyfriend and I are both on the independent side. Works well, no guilt about doing other stuff and living in different states isn't as bad as it could be (although that will hopefully be fixed in a few months).
Even when together, it's entirely possible we'll both be working on our own bikes in the garage, I'll change my oil while he washes the car, whatever. Works well, we get to do stuff we enjoy, and no one's bored.
I don’t party or go to clubs. I gave that up a long time ago and really never enjoyed it to begin with.
My alone time is riding my bikes and training my dogs.
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