Foo - Fence jumper trap?

My backdoor neighbors are a bunch of just outa high school punks that are constantly having parties and doing things just outa high school punks tend to do. Normally I don't really mind, but the other night one of their little parties got busted by the cops which resulted in 50 or so just outa high school punks stampeding through my back yard and waking me up at 2 am, plus a little damage to the fence. My only consolation was that I haven't cleaned the dog **** out of my dog's run in a few days and they all went straight through it. :)

That got me thinking though, what if there was something a little more sinister than dog poo waiting for them next time? I'm thinking I'll string 20 or so junker bikes, along with the 20+ rusty wheels I've been saving for my wheel fence across the yard. I'll also spray my side of the the fence with water so it's all icy and the can't climb back over the fence. Then, I'll sit on the back porch with my dog and my neighbors two dogs (all three are big but harmless). Finally I'd pop a bag of popcorn, call the cops, and when the kids come over the fence and get tangled in bikes yell "release the hounds" and watch as best I can through tears of laughter as they try and climb over an icy fence with three barking dogs at their heels.

Well foosters, is there anything I haven't though of?

LOL sounds like a good way to spend a late Saturday evening! :D

Make sure to get a camcorder to show us the footage!

Just gotta make sure it doesn't look like a trap. Just a very, very unfortunately deadly backyard.

So no pits full of sharpened bamboo, I'm afraid.

We had these lined up against our fence. Our house was on the corner and easy access for burglars.

http://www.photo-wizard.net/viewPreview.php?preview=4515

http://thosedarnsqurls.mswin.net/Agave_am_albomarginata.jpg

http://www.trionursery.com/tc2images/Agave%20Americana.jpg

Oooh, those things get nasty when they're big.

Yep. Lotsa pokies. And you can always tell the cops he ruined your landscaping and want compensation.

I witnessed the exact same thing (exactly the same thing) about 10 years ago when I was single and renting. I would build the fench higher if possible. I would not want to slow their departure from my yard in the least. Signs facing property in question stating "Trespassers will be shot on sight, survivors will be shot again" might be funny. At least it will get the property owners attention.

Then again bear traps would totally kick ass.

Rocksalt loaded into shotgun shells?

Utah is one of the more reasonable states. In a more lawsuit happy area anyone hurt on the bikes would start suing if injured. Also many towns have limits on fence height. Naturally thorny plants as a solid, continuous hedge are perfect. Check with a local native plant nursery to save on water. In Northern California I'd go for black Hawthorne mingled with Himalayan blackberry vines.

In a more lawsuit happy area anyone hurt on the bikes would start suing if injured.I hate this crap. You know what? If you're trespassing on my property, **** you if you get hurt.

oooooooooooooooo X cussed.

So how do you get the ban button to work now?

oooooooooooooooo X cussed.

So how do you get the ban button to work now?


Sue happy/Ban happy californians:(:D

I hate this crap. You know what? If you're trespassing on my property, **** you if you get hurt.


Well, you remember a robber who broke into a family's house the day before they left for vacation. He was in their garage and then hid when they left so they wouldn't know he was in their garage. It turns out he was locked in their garage for 2 weeks until they came home from vacation and had to live on bags of dog food. He actually pressed charges, saying they caused him brain trauma. But you know the worst part? He won the case.

NOW let's hear you swear :mad:

Just dig a hugeass pit 6 feet wide 20 feet deep all around your fence.

Well, you remember a robber who broke into a family's house the day before they left for vacation. He was in their garage and then hid when they left so they wouldn't know he was in their garage. It turns out he was locked in their garage for 2 weeks until they came home from vacation and had to live on bags of dog food. He actually pressed charges, saying they caused him brain trauma. But you know the worst part? He won the case.

NOW let's hear you swear :mad:Should have vacationed longer. Dead people don't sue.

Make sure to get a camcorder to show us the footage!

Youtube! Youtube! Youtube!

Then again bear traps would totally kick ass.


**** that. Just use the bears.


I want to see somebody try to get past my bears trap.

Just wait until you get attacked by even bigger bears. Then you'll wish you'd opted for bear traps.

Just wait until you get attacked by even bigger bears. Then you'll wish you'd opted for bear traps.

Oh snap, I was with Serendipper till you said this. I think I'll go with bear traps. A bears trap would definitely be cooler though.

Seriously though, I don't care that they crossed through my yard, I just want a little youtube fame. It's not very often that you have both the ability to perfectly predict the behavior of a large group of people, the chance to plan ahead AND the advantage of home turf. I think I'd be a fool not to take advantage.

Sue happy/Ban happy californians:(:D

I'm a Siu happy Arizonan!

Pungi Stakes…………but check your local laws first. ;)

You mentioned a dog in the op, yes? Well, dogs dig holes to bury bones in and if your dog has a lot of bones and you have all these gopher holes in your yard and someone running across your yard in the dark were to plant a foot in one of these holes at speed...

See where I'm going with this. :D

You mentioned a dog in the op, yes? Well, dogs dig holes to bury bones in and if your dog has a lot of bones and you have all these gopher holes in your yard and someone running across your yard in the dark were to plant a foot in one of these holes at speed...

See where I'm going with this. :D

can you say, broken ankles????

'Zacly! :D

That dayum pesky dog!

Clean the poop out of your yard...and put it on the fence. Or put something sticky on there, something that will stain and stink up their clothes.

Or, in line with the gopher hole idea, do some creative landscaping with softball size stones where they land. I very much also like the cactus idea. They use that in "It Takes a Thief" TV show.

Ooooo, lots of poo!!!


And yes you must film the mass exit!

Make sure to get a camcorder to show us the footage!

+1. This sounds like youtube gold, although the cops might not appreciate it.

But who knows, maybe they will.

I'm thinking spotlights and loudspeakers.

You won't get the immediate satisfaction of watching them suffer and it would be hard to keep up in cooler climates...

...BUT...

Plant poison ivy along your fence. It grows fast and will intertwine itself along the fence. Sure, they may climb over. They may destroy your yard. They may even give you the bird as they run through. However, you have the satisfaction of knowing that they will be tortured for weeks to come with itching, blistering, oozing sores.

Just sayin.;)

Well, you remember a robber who broke into a family's house the day before they left for vacation. He was in their garage and then hid when they left so they wouldn't know he was in their garage. It turns out he was locked in their garage for 2 weeks until they came home from vacation and had to live on bags of dog food. He actually pressed charges, saying they caused him brain trauma. But you know the worst part? He won the case.

NOW let's hear you swear :mad:

Urban legend. This isn't true at all; it's one of those "Stella Award" (http://www.snopes.com/legal/lawsuits.asp) emails. There are enough outrageous lawsuits out there without having to make up fake ones.

move to Texas. The right to defend laws here make it much easier to defend your propertry.

Just be sure that your neighbor moves to Texas, too, and brings all his friends, or moving is moot.

Roses. :D

You won't get the immediate satisfaction of watching them suffer and it would be hard to keep up in cooler climates...

...BUT...

Plant poison ivy along your fence. It grows fast and will intertwine itself along the fence. Sure, they may climb over. They may destroy your yard. They may even give you the bird as they run through. However, you have the satisfaction of knowing that they will be tortured for weeks to come with itching, blistering, oozing sores.

Just sayin.;)

Not necessarily. I could roll around nekkid in the stuff and it'll never bother me in the slightest. Of course the sight of it would be it's own humiliation. :eek:

Ice down the inside of the fence and random sections of your backyard. Have bike parts and dog poo strewn about. Put a couple of flash-blinders (800W shop lamps rigged to motion detectors) set to low freq. strobe when triggered. Watch drunk teens scattering from police enjoy the 'Disco of Doom' that is your backyard.

Or you could do what I did when local hoolies kept knocking over my cord-stacked firewood: Rat traps with roofing nails soldered to the spring bar. Those'll spike through a tennis shoe in a heartbeat, and they're good whether someone steps on the actuator, or just stomps on the nails.

Don't bother checking with municipal regulations, I'll tell you up front. Neither one of these is even remotely legal.

Roses. :D

+1 along with some Yucca spanish bayonnet. I had to rip up one of those plants at my old house - it is aptly named.

Perhaps you can go with somthing a little more subtle: :D

http://demo.openedit.org/store/products/images/medium/anvil-100.jpg

... Brad

Not necessarily. I could roll around nekkid in the stuff and it'll never bother me in the slightest. Of course the sight of it would be it's own humiliation. :eek:

Me too! You and I are in the <10% of people who don't react to poison ivy.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/c/c1/US_M18a1_claymore_mine.jpg/300px-US_M18a1_claymore_mine.jpg

Dig a pit and line it with pungee sticks. Problem solved.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/c/c1/US_M18a1_claymore_mine.jpg/300px-US_M18a1_claymore_mine.jpg

lol.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/c/c1/US_M18a1_claymore_mine.jpg/300px-US_M18a1_claymore_mine.jpg

Effective, but then you have to spend the next day pressure washing bits of 'em off your fence.

Effective, but then you have to spend the next day pressure washing bits of 'em off your fence.Nah. Leave the bits. Future warning.

I'd think the vultures hanging out along the fence (feeding) would be warning enough. :eek:

http://www.westernhigh.org/projects/habitats/scrubs/vultures.gif

I say paintball gun.

Just be sure that your neighbor moves to Texas, too, and brings all his friends, or moving is moot.

Moving to Texas is never moot. Folks around here have enough sense not to cross onto other people's property............. twice.

That is unless you live South of the Rio Grande.

1.Go buy a sheet of cheap glass,put it in a stout bag,beat the crap out of it with a hammer.
2.spray some contact adhesive along the top rail of the fence. (3-M will work nicely)
3. carefully and liberally sprinkle smashed glass on top rail,a couple of applications will do.
4.for added effect mix rock salt with smashed glass.

my neighbors son (adult) came over the fence to retrieve a soccer ball (a usual occurance,
the younger kids just come to the door or yell over the fence). My wife went ballistic and I think
she mentioned a 38 special and some other reasons (like our German Shepard) why climbing over
the fence might not be a good idea.

speaking of rock salt in a shot gun, anyone ever been salted? I can testify it's not a whole
lot of fun.

marty