General Cycling Discussion - Inappropriate behaviour

Ever find yourself doing something in public, and in a non-cycling context, that is utterly inappropriate when you're out of the saddle? I have found myself unthinkingly reaching down and, er, "straightening" myself at utterly inopportune moments, and emptying my sinuses -- sans kleenex -- as I would on a ride.

These are not things that the general, non cycling public considers appropriate behaviour in almost any context. Maybe I just spend too much time in the saddle... maybe it's my natural habitat.

Originally posted by velocipedio
Ever find yourself doing something in public, and in a non-cycling context, that is utterly inappropriate when you're out of the saddle? I have found myself unthinkingly reaching down and, er, "straightening" myself at utterly inopportune moments, and emptying my sinuses -- sans kleenex -- as I would on a ride.

These are not things that the general, non cycling public considers appropriate behaviour in almost any context. Maybe I just spend too much time in the saddle... maybe it's my natural habitat.

I do exactly those two things. I also do something much worse sometimes. When I'm in the saddle on solo rides I sometimes sing Screaming Jets songs. This is a problem when I'm in public because my singing voice really sucks.

It's funny you bring this subject up as I was just talking about it with some friends last week. We are all whitewater paddlers and blowing your nose sans kleenex is as normal as breathing. We don't think twice about it but you sure get some strange looks depending on where you are.

Keep blowing...but blow hard.

Mike

Originally posted by mccubbin

Keep blowing...but blow hard.


Ummm... you might want to think about editing that one :D

Hey, I got my 1500th post already!

Originally posted by Chris L


Ummm... you might want to think about editing that one :D



lol, what on earth were you thinking chris l!?

cabledonut.

Or on long group rides, folks popping not too far into the woods to relieve themselves.

Anyone find yourself doing that when NOT on a bike ride?

Isn't that what the woods are for? Bears do it.

This ones a bit dirty.


I had a friend once - how good the old days were - he used to commute a total of 40miles per day. If it was raining heavily on his way home and he need to empty his bladder he would simply just wet himself. His argument was that he was soaked to the skin and cold anyway, so by peeing he wasn't going to get any wetter, only warmer.

Fair comment.

Originally posted by mccubbin
We are all whitewater paddlers and blowing your nose sans kleenex is as normal as breathing. We don't think twice about it but you sure get some strange looks depending on where you are.

Mike

Around here it's known as 'The Famer's Hankie'.

And, velocipeio, I'm not sure where you're coming from. I do these things when I'm not in the saddle too. I follow Billy Connoly's Strategy for Scratching Your Arse in Public. It works. ;)

Originally posted by Allister
I follow Billy Connoly's Strategy for Scratching Your Arse in Public. It works. ;)
Do tell...

This thread is TOO funny. I thought the only person who did the clear-the-sinus thing sans kleenex was my ex! It was always one of those irritating little habits that I just learned to overlook! So... it WASN'T just him.

Originally posted by velocipedio

Do tell...

Ah, a bite :)

Ordinarily when you need to scratch your arse in public, you try all manner of surreptitious methods to ease the irritation. For example, there's a particular walk you can do whereby you try to rub one cheek against the other without using your hands.

None of these methods are particlularly effective nor satisfying, so Billy Connolly suggests that when you need to scratch your arse in public, that you stop and in a proud and happy voice declare "MY GOD MY ARSE IS ITCHY! I THINK I'LL GIVE IT A DARN GOOD SCRATCHING!", and then scratch it as effusively as possible.

Naturally everyone else will look away in embarassment.

Originally posted by Allister

None of these methods are particlularly effective nor satisfying, so Billy Connolly suggests that when you need to scratch your arse in public, that you stop and in a proud and happy voice declare "MY GOD MY ARSE IS ITCHY! I THINK I'LL GIVE IT A DARN GOOD SCRATCHING!", and then scratch it as effusively as possible.

Naturally everyone else will look away in embarassment.

LOL :D Why didn't I think of that one.

Originally posted by dixiepixie
This thread is TOO funny. I thought the only person who did the clear-the-sinus thing sans kleenex was my ex! It was always one of those irritating little habits that I just learned to overlook! So... it WASN'T just him.
Welcome, DP!

I am glad someone has the guts to say they are from somewhere other than "Atlanta." ;)

As far as the "snot rocket" goes, I have only perfected that one in the shower, but haven't has much success on the road... :blush:

Originally posted by Pete Clark

As far as the "snot rocket" goes, I have only perfected that one in the shower, but haven't has much success on the road... :blush:
Admittedly, it can take a little technique. Blasting away in the middle of a paceline can be dicey from an interpersonal, social interaction perspective. I prefer to wait till I rotate back, though I know one guy who admitted that he has, on occasion, started an off-the-front attack with a sinus blast.

The other problem, of course, is that, without proper technique, you can get snot stains on your shoulders. :)

Originally posted by Allister


Ah, a bite :)

Ordinarily when you need to scratch your arse in public, you try all manner of surreptitious methods to ease the irritation. For example, there's a particular walk you can do whereby you try to rub one cheek against the other without using your hands.

None of these methods are particlularly effective nor satisfying, so Billy Connolly suggests that when you need to scratch your arse in public, that you stop and in a proud and happy voice declare "MY GOD MY ARSE IS ITCHY! I THINK I'LL GIVE IT A DARN GOOD SCRATCHING!", and then scratch it as effusively as possible.

Naturally everyone else will look away in embarassment.


i can just picture him on stage saying that!! that guy is so funny, i've had to stop tapes of his, when watching him, for fear of suffocation from laughing too hard!

cabledonut.

LOL! Pete. After a 7-year stint of working at home, I went back to work in Atlanta in February. That's as close as I care to get to saying I'm from Atlanta!! Don't get me wrong -- Atlanta's okay. I'm just not much of a city person anymore.

Originally posted by wabbit
Now, everyone will be looking at women and wondering if she's just moving her arm or scratching a really itchy boob.

Actually, I'm usually trying to figure out how to ask her if she'd like to try out a bicycle built for two... :D

This sort of reminds me of something kind of off topic- not to do with cycling. The dilemma of scratching an itchy boob . LIke when it really itches for some reason and you just desperately want to give it a really good scratch, but can't (in public) at the risk of looking like a female gorilla scratching her chest. So, I discreetly rub my arm across the offending boob in such a way that it doesn't look like anything out of the ordinary (so I assume, that is).

Now, everyone will be looking at women and wondering if she's just moving her arm or scratching a really itchy boob.

This sort of reminds me of something kind of off topic- not to do with cycling. The dilemma of scratching an itchy boob . LIke when it really itches for some reason and you just desperately want to give it a really good scratch, but can't (in public) at the risk of looking like a female gorilla scratching her chest. So, I discreetly rub my arm across the offending boob in such a way that it doesn't look like anything out of the ordinary (so I assume, that is).

You could always ask someone to do it for you. I'm sure you'd have any number of volunteers. ;)


Originally posted by wabbit

Now, everyone will be looking at women and wondering if she's just moving her arm or scratching a really itchy boob.

That's not exactly what's in the forefront of my mind when I'm looking at ladies boobs...

: present's hand for slapping :

Allister