"The 33"-Road Bike Racing - Scheduling races with the wife

I've got 4 to 5 more races (road races) in the next month I want to do. I just sent a list to the wife via email. God, I love email. I can tell (or ask) her things without seeing that look on her face. You know the one?

"This is what I think of your racing schedule!!!"
http://images.jupiterimages.com/common/detail/25/86/22778625.jpg

Dont ask... just do.

I'm trying to race on our wedding anniversary. And her birthday.

i scheduled my wedding around racing

She doesn't come to your races?

She doesn't come to your races?

Not many. I asked her to go to one coming up with the kids. I hope she says yes.

I'd have to recommend discussing "controversial" subjects face-to-face, rather than via email.

Just saying...

She doesn't come to your races?

My wife offers to go, but I don't have the heart to wake her at 6:00 am on Saturdays to watch me be pack fodder.

careful now...

http://www.anaheim-divorce-attorney-lawyer.com/images/anaheim-divorce-attorney-02.jpg

I'd have to recommend discussing "controversial" subjects face-to-face, rather than via email.

Just saying...

They end up that way - don't worry. It's more of an ice breaker. She can read and stew for a bit then we can talk later. Usually she's ok by the time we're home and settled. Then I'll bring it out in the open.

careful now...

No, she won't leave me. She likes my skinny body too much. ;)

She'll come straight out and say no. Then we'll make compromises. Which usually entails me dressing up in some weird costume at night for her jollies.

No, she won't leave me. She likes my skinny body too much. ; )

She'll come straight out and say no. Then we'll make compromises. Which usually entails me dressing up in some weird costume at night for her jollies.

http://paulbuckley14059.files.wordpress.com/2007/10/eliot_spitzer.jpg

Tis better to beg for forgiveness then ask for permission

Yeah, email is fine for us too, but I can't overstate the importance of clear, crisp communication for a strong marriage. We put the races on the family calendar, and I'm done.

I just said that there are 10 races coming up in Feb and March, and I'd like to do three of them. Which dates are best for you? So, that's my Spring series. I'll hit some big crits in the summer, TTs in the fall. I'll be doing a lot of Tuesday Nighters, Tuesday night TTs, and Thursday crits.

Not many. I asked her to go to one coming up with the kids. I hope she says yes.

That would be cool if she did. There's nothing like having your own cheering section out there. :) How old are your kids?

I guess I'm spoiled because I'm in a relationship with another cyclist. I actually research the races, sign him up and tell him which ones he's doing. :p

That would be cool if she did. There's nothing like having your own cheering section out there. :) How old are your kids?

12 and 8.

They have been. When I did the BMW center crit they were there. I loved hearing them yell for me. I loved it. But sometimes I can't get her up to go. She loves her sleep a little more than watching me race - especially when I leave before 7am.

when i saw the title of this thread, i thought you had a wife that also raced bikes. I was going to be very jealous!

Yeah, email is fine for us too, but I can't overstate the importance of clear, crisp communication for a strong marriage. We put the races on the family calendar, and I'm done.

I just said that there are 10 races coming up in Feb and March, and I'd like to do three of them. Which dates are best for you? So, that's my Spring series. I'll hit some big crits in the summer, TTs in the fall. I'll be doing a lot of Tuesday Nighters, Tuesday night TTs, and Thursday crits.

That's basically what I do. I'll send her a list and we discuss it later. For some reason this works better then coming straight out. She huffs and puffs while I start telling her or showing her the schedule. By doing this I have cut out some of that.

12 and 8.

They have been. When I did the BMW center crit they were there. I loved hearing them yell for me. I loved it. But sometimes I can't get her up to go. She loves her sleep a little more than watching me race - especially when I leave before 7am.

well... crits are petty damn boring to watch.

just sayin'

I'm in the same boat and I take the same tact - email a schedule, then discuss it later. Be sure to put a few extra races in your schedule that you don't mind missing. Also stress how many races you are skipping - as in WR's 'there are 10 races and I'd like to do 3'.

when i saw the title of this thread, i thought you had a wife that also raced bikes. I was going to be very jealous!

I thought the same thing.

Az

Not many. I asked her to go to one coming up with the kids. I hope she says yes.

My wife and kids have come to a few races. I wouldn't bring them to a road race - too much sitting in a parking lot in the middle of nowhere. They have come to a crit, but I don't really like my wife to see the inevitable crashes. There is a 2 mile circuit race in a park about 25 blocks from my house. It has a nice safe course with a playground right near the start/finish. A perfect race to bring the family. I loved it when I podiumed in that race and my kids asked "Why didn't you win?".

too funny.. I do the same thing.. Figures she'll have time to think about it before getting home. My wife is cool with racing but doesn't like group rides since I'm usally out of the house for more than 4 hours.

I raced on my wedding anniversary last year. And the year before. Unfortunately my favorite race is scheduled for that weekend. This is the race that got me back into racing and that I look forward to and dread all year. Both times my wife came out with me to feed. We make a road trip out of it (we like road trips).

Last year she said something about racing for our anniversary, so I took her to a fancy B&B for a getaway as a replacement. Of course I did schedule it during a rest week.

This year she's gotten into running and has signed up for some races.. unfortunately they're all on the same days as races I really want to do and have already signed up for. I'd like to be there to cheer her on and calm pre-race nerves but I also don't want to make a big deal of it since its the first time she's been competitive at any athletic endeavour, and I don't want to jinx it. But if she keeps at it I think I'll have to alternate.

That's basically what I do. I'll send her a list and we discuss it later. For some reason this works better then coming straight out. She huffs and puffs while I start telling her or showing her the schedule. By doing this I have cut out some of that.

I understand the email thing and giving her the whole schedule at once. That's what I do when I'm begging Grandma to watch the kids...drop six months worth on her at a time. ;)

I have to ask, what is her issue with you racing? Why the huffing and puffing?

^^^^ It's time, money, injury risk, travel, disrupts the household, then she has to listen to me go on and on about racing... should I go on?

^^^^ It's time, money, injury risk, travel, disrupts the household, then she has to listen to me go on and on about racing... should I go on?

+10000000

Not to mention attention and focus not on her.

Gotcha. ;)

Not to mention attention and focus not on her.

I'm already throwing a tantrum about that very thing and my boyfriend probably has no idea. He just upgrade to Cat IV, thus losing his spot at San Dimas Stage Race. UMD, trying to be helpful, suggested he come up and race up in his area that weekend. I posted on the thread and said NO! I need my cheerleader for San Dimas!!! He probably has no idea this is even going on. :p

Not to mention attention and focus not on her.


+1 That's so true.. It could be cycling, happy hour with buddies or anything that doesn't focus on her... A woman will have an issue with it.

+1 That's so true.. It could be cycling, happy hour with buddies or anything that doesn't focus on her... A woman will have an issue with it.

Not all women! My boyfriend did 1400+ miles in January and I made out his training/commuting schedule each week.

It helps if you can make it a date-type thing. I love bike racing, my wife loves good wine and food. Luckily for me there are a few races in Napa, Sonoma, and Livermore.

Or to include the kids: Saturday's race happens to be a mile from our house so my wife is bringing the kids so they can take part in the kids 300 m "race." Good times to be had by all.

Scheduling races with the wife ...

... make sure she finishes first and then all is good.

Not all women! My boyfriend did 1400+ miles in January and I made out his training/commuting schedule each week.

You're an exception to the rule...

She'll come straight out and say no. Then we'll make compromises. Which usually entails me dressing up in some weird costume at night for her jollies.

:lol: spandex and disco shoes?

my wife just assumes im racing or going on a group ride every weekend. I am lucky she doesnt have any reservations over it since she doesnt know how to drive and if I ever get hurt it really screws everything up.

Anyone else getting the widow speech come summer?

^^^^ It's time, money, injury risk, travel, disrupts the household, then she has to listen to me go on and on about racing... should I go on?

That sums it up. None of this was an issue until we had kids as my wife doesn't mind time alone. Now if I am racing, she is watching the kids and therefore gets no time to herself.

Anyone else getting the widow speech come summer?

Just bitter references to my carbon fiber girlfriend.

well... crits are petty damn boring to watch.

just sayin'

disagree. I dont even ask my wife to come to road races anymore. watching a road race = standing around for hours while the pack goes by every hr. or so. Crits on the other hand, especially those in downtown urban centers, are great for spectating, sitting at a sidewalk restaurant, with an announcer, seeing the race come by every minute or so, much more watchable.

disagree. I dont even ask my wife to come to road races anymore. watching a road race = standing around for hours while the pack goes by every hr. or so. Crits on the other hand, especially those in downtown urban centers, are great for spectating, sitting at a sidewalk restaurant, with an announcer, seeing the race come by every minute or so, much more watchable.

for every downtown crit, there's half a dozen industrial park crits.

no downtown renewal, complete with sidewalk cafes, to be had at those.

It's the other way around here. Quite a few downtown crits where people can sit at the pub and watch. Just a couple of industrial crits. It's a pretty neat atmosphere.

And I must add that I have a very cool wife. It helps that I watch the baby every day I'm off, 2 out of every 3 days and get to spend a ton of time with the baby. She knows that I ride the trainer at 0430am and at midnight to spend more time with them, so she pretty much doesn't mind any of my races.

Anyone else getting the widow speech come summer?

I pretty much get that all year.:rolleyes:

My bike ended up coming to my wedding, sort of semi accidentally. My wife works the Bethel races. We have a tandem. And this year she told me I should register for everything I can, except for a couple weekends where we have other things planned.

Of course, registering for a road race and actually doing more than a few miles of it are two different things. But we'll see. I haven't registered for anything yet.

Generally speaking I usually make a list, send it, she may veto a non priority race (she knows my priority races), and that's it.

Now if I could get other things to work like that (my former job for example) then I'd have raced a lot more.

cdr

Never have that issue... our issue is who is doing what race when... since we only have one car, but both of us are racing... and not always at the same place. Second compromise is that we do have a couple of vacations this year planned that will result in missed races... I can live with that... especially since the compromise includes climbing Alpe d'Huez...

I'm working on my wife to race on her birthday. It's not a big race, but one I'd like to do. She's starting to consider it as it would be her first race in several years. What's more fun than racing on your birthday?

She doesn't come to your races?

Yeah, right :D

(I'm married to Sub's wife's long lost twin sister)

well... crits are petty damn boring to watch.

just sayin'

Not compared to road races