Jokes & Humor - Rejected Children's Book Titles
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01-22-04, 04:01 AM
it's about time this thread was re-launched. for those who don't remember, this was an institution of the bikeforums joke section until a software upgrade killed it last time around. it's about time it was put back so here goes:
1. Debbie was so bad, her mom stopped loving her.
2. Why Billy has two daddies.
3. Johnny's adventure in the medicine cabinet.
4. Running with Scissors
5. Daddy drinks because you cry.
6. Billy was so bad, his Daddy left forever.
7. Why Mommy's Boyfriends Pay Her
8. Good KIds Don't Move the Crackpipe
9. Curious George: How He Contracted the Virus
10. The Little Pony Who Killed Kids and Drank Blood
11. Curious George and the Busy Intersection
12. Green Eggs and Ham: The Atkins Diet Revolution for Children
13. The Girl in the Tub Goes Blub (Dr Seuss)
14. When good kids tell (Michael Jackson)
15. Harry Potter and the Chamber of Commerce
16. 101 Things To Do at the Bottom of the Pool
17. Things Rich Kids Have, But You Never Will
18. The Pop-Up Book of Human Anatomy
19. Eric and Dylan's magic trenchcoat.
20. Things Chris L would love to do with Katy Steele but she'll never go for.
(actually, #20 probably only involves her serenading him at dusk).
01-27-04, 10:46 AM
21. The Truth About Your Accidental Birth
22. Why Mommy Lied To You
23. Life Is Short, Then You Die
24. Smoking is For Grownups, Not Children
25. Games to Play at Construction Sites
26. What Happened to Grandma After She Was Buried
27. The End of the World is Coming Soon
28. So You Want to Be A Firefighter?
29. Real Animals That Eat Pets and Children
30. Poisonous Snakes and Their Cousins
31. The President Is Your Enemy
32. Why Your Parents Eat Flesh
33. 99 Bad Things You Don't Want to Happen to You
34. The Coming World Economic Breakdown
35. Nature's Creatures That Thrive On Blood
36. Communicable Diseases and Their Hosts
37. Why Some People Are Better Off Unborn
38. Spooky Sounds From the Bedroom
39. Just Say "No" to Your Parents
40. Why Foreigners Wear Strange Clothes
41. "Happy," the Skinhead Clown
42. How to Medicate Yourself Out of Depression
01-28-04, 11:10 AM
43. Children's Catalog of Prescription Medicines
44. The Little Book of Jellied Gasoline Devices
45. Junior Guide to Chainsaw Operation
46. How to Survive a Nuclear Attack
47. Concealed Weapons and How to Use Them Effectively
01-29-04, 03:54 AM
48. Juggling Knives is Easy
49. Where to Find the toys in the Oven
50. Where Mommy & Daddy Hide Neat Things
51. If its Storming out the Best Place to keep shelter is under a tree
52. The New Boy is Bad
53. Your Nightmares are real
54. Kick, Scream, and Cry to Get What You Want
55. "Whatcha' Doin'" the Wonderful Phrase
56. 101 Games to Play in the Road
57. The Indoor Pool is a Big Potty and the Divingboard is the Flusher
58. Homemade Fireworks using a Bathtub,a Blowdryer,and a Fork
59. POP, goes the Hamster and other fun Microwave Games
60. Arthur Gets Hunted
61. Clifford and the Big Yellow Semi
62. Monsters Killed Grandpa
63. The hit sequel to "Elvis is your real dad" Mrs.Clause is your real Mom
64. Chicken Poop for the Kid Soul
65. All Guns Squirt Water
66. When The Garbage Truck Came to Sesame Street
67. How Fun it is to Tie a Squirrel to a Kite
68. You Can Get Sucked Down the Drain
69. How to Make Sushi with Ordinary Goldfish
70. 101 recipies to make with Dog
71. Grampa Gets A Casket
72. Dad's New Wife Robert
73. The Magical World Inside The Abandoned Refridgerator
74. The Time When Elmer REALLY got Bugs
75. Scooby Doo Gets Rabbis
76. The Lion, the Steak, and the Blender
77. The Little Kitten that was too Curious.....
78. The Boy who was so Stupid that his Dad put him up for Adoption
79. Mickey Mouse and the Mouse Trap
80. Chuck E. Cheese and Cheddar get a Flamethrower
Yes, I know 75 is a typo, but I think it's even funnier that way.
81. Strangers Have the Best Candy
82. The Little Sissy Who Snitched
83. Some Kittens Can Fly!
84. The Attention Deficit Disorder Association's Book of Wild Animals of North Amer-Hey! Let's Go Ride Our Bikes!
85. The Kid's Guide to Hitchhiking
86. You Are Different and That's Bad
87. Dad's New Wife Michael
88. Curious George and the High Voltage Fence
89. The Boy Who Died From Eating All His Vegetables
90. The Care Bears Maul Some Campers and Are Shot Dead
91. How to Become the Dominant Military Power in Your Elementary School
92. Controlling the Playground: Respect Through Fear
93. What is That Dog Doing to That Other Dog?
94. Why Can't Mr. Fork and Ms. Electrical Outlet Be Friends?
95. Bi-Curious George
96. Grandpa Went To Hell
12-01-09, 11:04 AM
http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2104/1494055340_ba737f5dae_o.gif for a fun old thread.
12-02-09, 08:00 PM
These are priceless! :D:D:D :roflmao2::roflmao2:
12-31-09, 02:21 PM
Why aren't these published?! XD
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