supernova87a
01-23-04, 03:05 PM
NYT, September 24, 2000, Sunday, Late Edition - Final
By CARL SOMMERS
THIS is a popular time of year to hit the road for long bike rides held to
raise money for good causes or just to get cyclists together for a 100-mile
spin. It's also a great time of year for a shorter bike trip, around the park
or around the block. But the masses pass by on two wheels, don't believe they are
all alike. There are several classes of bike rider. For those who care -- and
there are people who spend their lives classifying birds or ferns, after all,
so why not bicyclists? -- here is a field guide to the bicyclist.
Easy Rider
HABITAT -- The local park. Quiet, one-way streets, often riding against traffic
instead of with it (as cyclists should do). Sidewalks.
BIKE -- Yard-sale special with swept-up handlebars and a few gears, or a
department store "mountain bike" that would disintegrate if it ever got on an
actual mountain.
DRESS -- In warm weather, bermuda or gym shorts, T-shirts. In colder weather,
sweat pants, leather jackets.
GOODS CARRIED -- Fanny packs.
SHOES -- Sneakers.
HELMET -- "We're not going far from home."
GOAL -- "Exercise," once or twice a year.
ATTITUDE TOWARD HILLS -- Only if their house is on one.
MOST IMPORTANT COMPUTER FUNCTION -- They make computers for bikes?
NOTES -- These riders barely get noticed by the other categories. Yet they
NOTES -- These riders barely get noticed by the other categories. Yet they
probably enjoy the activity more than any of the others.
Tourist
HABITAT -- Gathering for group rides in parking lots, moving in lines along
suburban roads or sitting at tables in front of delis.
BIKE -- Mountain bikes (never ridden off asphalt) or entry-level road bikes
(the
ones with the curved-down handlebars and skinny tires), often with rear-view
mirrors.
DRESS -- Some dressed like the Easy Riders others in bike shorts, T-shirts or
bike jerseys in solids or colorful patterns.
SHOES -- Sneakers or shoes with a cleat that clips in to the pedal, often with
soles flexible enough for walking when off the bike.
GOODS CARRIED -- Pockets or fanny packs.
HELMET -- White, with a couple of vents.
GOAL -- Go for a nice group ride, later to go for a longer group ride.
HILLS -- Detours to avoid hills helps meet goals of longer rides.
MOST IMPORTANT COMPUTER FUNCTION -- Mileage.
NOTES -- These riders see bicycling as a healthful social activity. In the
office, they will brag about riding 25 miles.
Enthusiast
HABITAT -- Grinding away on suburban or rural roads or grinding round and round
BIKE -- A week's salary on two wheels.
DRESS -- In warm weather, bike shorts, solid-colored short-sleeved jerseys,
fingerless gloves. In colder weather, tights, long-sleeved jerseys, possibly
windbreakers, long-fingered gloves.
SHOES -- Clip-in shoes with rigid soles that clip and clop while walking.
HELMET -- Colored, with 12 or 16 vents.
GOODS CARRIED -- Saddle bag.
GOAL -- Go as fast as you can over increasingly long distances.
HILLS -- Hate them, but won't avoid them. Pedal hard on the downhill side, to
keep average speed higher.
MOST IMPORTANT COMPUTER FUNCTION -- Average speed.
NOTES -- Type A's on two wheels. These riders won't slow down for slower riders
(it will decrease their average speed), though they will wait for them at
intersections. They work too hard to talk much while riding. Won't talk about
their hobby at the office, but will be overheard arranging rides.
Racer
HABITAT -- Doing slow laps in the park waiting for the group to gather for a
hard training ride. Flying down the road in formation. Doing slow laps in the
park to cool down.
DRESS -- In warm weather, shorts, often bib variety, jersey with club name and
sponsors or a European professional team jersey, with names of sponsors that
make Italian screen doors or French milk. In very cold weather, face coverings
that make riders look like terrorists hijacking a jetliner.
BIKE -- A month's salary on two wheels. Exotic materials like titanium or
carbon
fiber or classic works of art in Italian steel.
SHOES -- Clip in, rigid soles preferably made of carbon fiber with air vent to
minimize drag.
HELMET -- Dark, with more vent than helmet.
GOODS CARRIED -- Everything, including spare tube and minipump, in rear pocket
of jersey.
GOAL -- To ride a bike light enough to hold over your head in one hand. To win
races.
HILLS -- The steeper the better.
MOST IMPORTANT COMPUTER FUNCTION -- Maximum speed.
NOTES -- Both men and women shave their legs and are equally vain about them.
Conversation in the saddle consists of rehashing previous races or discussing
bike components. At work, they don't talk about cycling at all, out of
realistic
fear that co-workers will think they are crazy.
By CARL SOMMERS
THIS is a popular time of year to hit the road for long bike rides held to
raise money for good causes or just to get cyclists together for a 100-mile
spin. It's also a great time of year for a shorter bike trip, around the park
or around the block. But the masses pass by on two wheels, don't believe they are
all alike. There are several classes of bike rider. For those who care -- and
there are people who spend their lives classifying birds or ferns, after all,
so why not bicyclists? -- here is a field guide to the bicyclist.
Easy Rider
HABITAT -- The local park. Quiet, one-way streets, often riding against traffic
instead of with it (as cyclists should do). Sidewalks.
BIKE -- Yard-sale special with swept-up handlebars and a few gears, or a
department store "mountain bike" that would disintegrate if it ever got on an
actual mountain.
DRESS -- In warm weather, bermuda or gym shorts, T-shirts. In colder weather,
sweat pants, leather jackets.
GOODS CARRIED -- Fanny packs.
SHOES -- Sneakers.
HELMET -- "We're not going far from home."
GOAL -- "Exercise," once or twice a year.
ATTITUDE TOWARD HILLS -- Only if their house is on one.
MOST IMPORTANT COMPUTER FUNCTION -- They make computers for bikes?
NOTES -- These riders barely get noticed by the other categories. Yet they
NOTES -- These riders barely get noticed by the other categories. Yet they
probably enjoy the activity more than any of the others.
Tourist
HABITAT -- Gathering for group rides in parking lots, moving in lines along
suburban roads or sitting at tables in front of delis.
BIKE -- Mountain bikes (never ridden off asphalt) or entry-level road bikes
(the
ones with the curved-down handlebars and skinny tires), often with rear-view
mirrors.
DRESS -- Some dressed like the Easy Riders others in bike shorts, T-shirts or
bike jerseys in solids or colorful patterns.
SHOES -- Sneakers or shoes with a cleat that clips in to the pedal, often with
soles flexible enough for walking when off the bike.
GOODS CARRIED -- Pockets or fanny packs.
HELMET -- White, with a couple of vents.
GOAL -- Go for a nice group ride, later to go for a longer group ride.
HILLS -- Detours to avoid hills helps meet goals of longer rides.
MOST IMPORTANT COMPUTER FUNCTION -- Mileage.
NOTES -- These riders see bicycling as a healthful social activity. In the
office, they will brag about riding 25 miles.
Enthusiast
HABITAT -- Grinding away on suburban or rural roads or grinding round and round
BIKE -- A week's salary on two wheels.
DRESS -- In warm weather, bike shorts, solid-colored short-sleeved jerseys,
fingerless gloves. In colder weather, tights, long-sleeved jerseys, possibly
windbreakers, long-fingered gloves.
SHOES -- Clip-in shoes with rigid soles that clip and clop while walking.
HELMET -- Colored, with 12 or 16 vents.
GOODS CARRIED -- Saddle bag.
GOAL -- Go as fast as you can over increasingly long distances.
HILLS -- Hate them, but won't avoid them. Pedal hard on the downhill side, to
keep average speed higher.
MOST IMPORTANT COMPUTER FUNCTION -- Average speed.
NOTES -- Type A's on two wheels. These riders won't slow down for slower riders
(it will decrease their average speed), though they will wait for them at
intersections. They work too hard to talk much while riding. Won't talk about
their hobby at the office, but will be overheard arranging rides.
Racer
HABITAT -- Doing slow laps in the park waiting for the group to gather for a
hard training ride. Flying down the road in formation. Doing slow laps in the
park to cool down.
DRESS -- In warm weather, shorts, often bib variety, jersey with club name and
sponsors or a European professional team jersey, with names of sponsors that
make Italian screen doors or French milk. In very cold weather, face coverings
that make riders look like terrorists hijacking a jetliner.
BIKE -- A month's salary on two wheels. Exotic materials like titanium or
carbon
fiber or classic works of art in Italian steel.
SHOES -- Clip in, rigid soles preferably made of carbon fiber with air vent to
minimize drag.
HELMET -- Dark, with more vent than helmet.
GOODS CARRIED -- Everything, including spare tube and minipump, in rear pocket
of jersey.
GOAL -- To ride a bike light enough to hold over your head in one hand. To win
races.
HILLS -- The steeper the better.
MOST IMPORTANT COMPUTER FUNCTION -- Maximum speed.
NOTES -- Both men and women shave their legs and are equally vain about them.
Conversation in the saddle consists of rehashing previous races or discussing
bike components. At work, they don't talk about cycling at all, out of
realistic
fear that co-workers will think they are crazy.
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