Folding Bikes - Dear folding bicycler person,

Dear one,

I am frank kufo, The only child of late Mr and Mrs kufo, My Late father was a very wealthy cocoa merchant based in abidjan, the economic capital of ivory coast before he was poisoned to death by his business associates on one of their outing to discuss on a business deal.

When my mother died on the 21st october 1993, my father took me so special because i am motherless. Before the death of my father on 24th januery 2006 in a private hospital here in abidjan.

He secretly called me on his bedside and told me that he has a sum of (US$4,500,000.00)four million five hundred thousand united states dollars) left in a suspense account in a local bank here in abidjan, that he used my name as his only son for the next of kin in deposit of the fund.

I would ask for you to pay for me to come to your country to study folding bicycles, and to buy many severals for myself and my wives. I would transfer to you by Western Union, ONE MILLIONS US DOLLARS TO ENABLE YOU TO BUY ALSO MANY BICYCLES and be hapy if you wil assist me in this endeevur.

Looking forwards to meetings you and your children.

May God Bless you.

F. Kufo (Dr.)

Dear Frank,

What details do you require? I will happily fax them over ASAP.

Can I begin by buying out Semsamecrunch's, Sammyboy's, Littlepixel's and Jur's collection of folders? It would also be great to buy out Brompton's factory but I'll need more than $1m to do so!

Your sincerely,
Mulleady

Dear Frank,

BE VERY CAREFUL....THIS IS A SCAM, conceived by mad English and irate Irish folding bike owners who frequent Hyde Park on dark stormy nights, seeking to get the better of poor unsuspecting souls like yourself.....No-one knows the true idenity of this secret society of FBOs, (folding bike owners), but I have heard that there's a wiley little Welshman, a terrible fiend who is only known by the letters L and P that leads this evil clan on their dastardly exploits. He once rode a legendary grey/blue Raleigh 20, which had the frightful ability to change its guise at will, but not being content, he forged a mystical beast from the deepest fiery pits, stained red with the blood of his foes...its name...so horrifying it cannot be uttered aloud, but in hushed fearful tones. There is another member of the society, a giant ogre who rides around naked, a sight so terrifying that few who have see him have lived to tell the tale.

Scotland Yard has for many years tried in vain to infiltrate this group, only to find their agents laying prostrate and abandoned on wild county lanes in the dead of winter, uttering unintelligeable gibberish about Bromptons, Raleighs, and especially Moultons. To date, none of the agents have made a full recovery, most just sit in a chair staring wistfuly out the window...mournfully chanting....Moulton...Moulton....Moulton.

Such is the extent of their influence, the society has spread to countries like the USA, Australia and New Zealand, where this cancerous folding disease in spreading unabated, but silently into the cycling communities. There is in Australia a rival folding warlord, who hoards many and varied examples of these beasts and can never decide which one he likes best, in fact he would even contemplate selling ALL his bikes just to obtain the magical perfect folding bike. His wisdom and knowledge is held in high regard by the FAMILY, others have tried to usurp his authority and question his declarations, only to be soundly trounced and to slither back to their dank dens, skulking and licking their wounds, astounded by the depths of his knowledge.

An extract from "Stevegor's scroll of folding bike folklore"

Frank, take my most earnest warnings....run for ya life.

Never trust anyone with an orange Downtube...

We sent any Irish scoundrels to Oz centuries ago to enhance your bloodlines! Only innocent ones like me are left over here 08-)

This scam is led and conceived by a mad English woman with a fluorescent orange bike and a Matrix reloaded. :D

Jinx! :P

hmm what folding bikes would i get if i had that money hmmm.... :D

hmm what folding bikes would i get if i had that money hmmm.... :D

You could get this... http://www.ufbusa.com

--sam

With more than one wife, Frank, just how will you find time to ride a bike? Even if it folds, which closet has room for it?

Dear Dr. Franc Kufo,

I was given your name buy a very trusted source. I would like to help you as a fellow folded bicycler.

I buy severals Bromptums, Bike Fridazes, Kentt, and Citysen foldings, only the very best.

In auddition, I make buys of severals bikes from Jur. He has manys of folders, and is willing to sell somes, because he only has one wife.

I also makes buys from Sammyboy, at great sums of dallors, for he needs moneys to buy some clothes.

This will make for me needs more sums of millons dollars. Please send me the entire sums of 4.5 Millons US dollars in a cashiers check. I will make severals buys of bikes, and send the balance of sums to you.

Yours Truely,
Trusted Friend

http://www.419eater.com/

Dear one,

...I would ask for you to pay for me to come to your country to study folding bicycles...

F. Kufo (Dr.)

Normally I love to send cash to anonymous Nigerians but unfortunately due to an impending deal with a Russian bride all my savings are tied up.

:d

Dear Frank,

Folders no good for Africa. STOP. Suggest try 28" roadster forum. STOP. Please come over for coffee. STOP. Sorry to hear about your folks. End message.

http://www.419eater.com/

Yes, I can see it now...you bait him to pay to have "folders" shipped to him. Fill boxes with old abandoned frames with "FOLDR" scratched onto the frame. Then wait for hilarious "dead" threats to come in. :roflmao2:

No mention of Joss Sticks yet???

Dear Frank,

Folders no good for Africa. STOP. Suggest try 28" roadster forum. STOP. Please come over for coffee. STOP. Sorry to hear about your folks. End message.


Hi Bill,

Another Victorian R20 owner I see, (must get Jur to form a club or arrange a R20 ride/meet one day), how about posting some pics?

http://www.419eater.com/

Very funny website. I wonder if snafu has the voice for recording audiobooks.

With more than one wife, Frank, just how will you find time to ride a bike? Even if it folds, which closet has room for it?

He mustn't have heard that riding a bike can cause impotence - or perhaps he has and seeks to be absolved from his 'duties'.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/2991088.stm

Dear Dr. Franc Kufo,

I was given your name buy a very trusted source. I would like to help you as a fellow folded bicycler.

I buy severals Bromptums, Bike Fridazes, Kentt, and Citysen foldings, only the very best.

In auddition, I make buys of severals bikes from Jur. He has manys of folders, and is willing to sell somes, because he only has one wife.

I also makes buys from Sammyboy, at great sums of dallors, for he needs moneys to buy some clothes.

This will make for me needs more sums of millons dollars. Please send me the entire sums of 4.5 Millons US dollars in a cashiers check. I will make severals buys of bikes, and send the balance of sums to you.

Yours Truely,
Trusted Friend



You forgot the references to God and Christ and 'My brother in faith'.

ai hing, at az a quare and geood gibberish, ha ha ha

geood luck

Phdr Alexander Potteamkin Csc

Sounds great, Doctor Kufo, but I'm already signed up with Doctor Bongo of Nigeria.

Hi Stevegor. One of the r20s I have is pictured here (http://wjpurcell.bigblog.com.au/index.do) .

If you guess hoe much munney in this breifcase I send you all $1.2 million of it..

http://www.theformationquest.org/MoneyCase.jpg


Your freind,

Dr. F. Kufo.

Would you like some rice?

If you guess hoe much munney in this breifcase I send you all $1.2 million of it..

http://www.theformationquest.org/MoneyCase.jpg


Your freind,

Dr. F. Kufo.


Will I have to send you some earnest money first, like I did with Doctor Bongo?

Hi Stevegor. One of the r20s I have is pictured here (http://wjpurcell.bigblog.com.au/index.do) .


Nice bike Bill, same colour as my wife's R20 NF, which will soon be BLACK like mine, if I wasn't so much of a computer dinosaur I'd post pics of our as well.

Hi Steve,

I'd love to know what the colour is called.

I had a '70's Chyrsler Valiant car, (in the 90's) with a very similar colour and I used to sometimes park it awkwardly.

And some punk would eventually angrily yell out "who owns that f#%ing brown valiant!"

"Ahem, I'd say. it's 'Moonstone'."

BillP