Favorite Simpsons Quotes

[Mayonnaise]

"Have The Rolling Stones Killed"

C.M. Burns

[jeff williams]

poster on wall of illegal fireworks storeroom.
"Play more with Claymore!"
Not funny, but worth thinking about.

If you don't know what it is in reference to-
It's a directional fragmentation mine.

I had a link but removed-but think, childen, minefields, fireworks, wars. sad,sad stuff.

[gonesh9]

I'm level 5 vegan: I don't eat anything that casts a shadow.

[ridealot]

My cat's breath smells like cat food.

Ralph Wiggum

[superchivo]

"Um. Mayo."

-Homer

[geneman]

"Ummmm ... hog fat"

[caloso]

They have the internet on computers now? -- Homer J. Simpson

[Bike666]

Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose... it's how drunk you get.

[Buzzbomb]

"Woohoo! Cheap meat!" - Homer J. Simpson

"Mmmm, forbidden soul donut..." - Homer J. Simpson

"Marge, it takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen." - Homer J. Simpson

"It's a scientific fact." - Homer J. Simpson

[originalbart]

"You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'." - Homer J. Simpson

[caloso]

SIDESHOW BOB: "Oh come, now. You wanted to be Krusty's sidekick since you were five! What about the buffoon lessons? The four years at clown college?"
CECIL: "I'll thank you not to refer to Princeton that way."

[temp1]

"you hit the tire fire"

[The Van]

"I'm so hungry I could eat Arby's"

[danr]

Homer at the post office trying to intercept an insulting letter that was accidentally sent to Mr. Burns.

Homer, "Hello, my name is Mr. Burns. I believe you have a letter for me."

Post office employee, "OK Mr. Burns, what is your first name."

Homer, "I don't know."

[temp1]

I think this is from Southpark, but "I don't trust anything that bleeds for 7 days and doesn't die"

[james Haury]

Homer. mmm making Bacon.

[RegularGuy]

"Put me back on my bike."
--Tom Simpson, Mont Ventoux, July 13, 1967

[pitboss]

Tramampoline!

[temp1]

Hootie McBoob
Bustie Laru

[pitboss]

Hootie McBoob
Bustie Laru
and Chesty Sinclair

[temp1]

and Chesty Sinclair

Doh!!

[bac]

"Put me back on my bike."
--Tom Simpson, Mont Ventoux, July 13, 1967

Damn!

[slvoid]

Kill my boss...? Do I dare live out the American dream?

[Mayonnaise]

"The doctor said I wouldn't have so many nose bleeds if I kept my finger outta there."

[caloso]

Principal Skinner, addressing a school assembly: "Are you adequately prepared to rock?"

[bradw]

"Marge, if you're going to get mad everytime I do something stupid,
then I guess I just have to stop doing stupid things!"

"To alcohol, the cause of, and the solution to, all of life's problems!"

There are so many others.

Like my sig below.

[robertsdvd]

Ok Brain, you don't like me and I don't like you, so let's just do this thing and I'll get back to killing you with beer. :beer:

[bombusben]

"These berries taste like burning" -Ralph

[damianb]

"Grease me up, woman!" - Groundskeeper Willie

[danr]

The episode where Bart rang up a credit card and bought a collie. Homer comments on the collie,

"This is the kind of dog you have to feed every day."

[Rev.Chuck]

Homer-
(I bought you) The Bob Seger box set. Which really only needed to be one disc, but... nice box.

[Buzzbomb]

The episode where Bart rang up a credit card and bought a collie. Homer comments on the collie,

"This is the kind of dog you have to feed every day."



Great, coffee all over the screen now...

[Mayonnaise]

"I'm doing all the pulling you blouse wearing poodle walker" Willie to Principal Skinner

[hammye]

"let me set the record straight. I thought the cop was a prostitute."
homer

[L-Dawg]

Barney -
AHH! Natural light! Get it off me, Get it off me!

[james Haury]

But I told you I'm not a pilot' I just wore this uniform so i could drink in the bar! (H Simpson) And I told you ,you fly boys crack me up! !(Airline employee)

[james Haury]

If word of this ever gets out Kwasy Clown airlines will become a laughingstock.(President of Airline?)

[pyze-guy]

Save me Jebus-Homer
I picked my nose til it bleeded-Ralph
HA Ha-Nelson

[poululla]

Smithers, release the hounds !!! - Mr. Burns

[RiPHRaPH]

too many....

homer's father, when found after escaping from the old folks home:

i'm cold....and there's wolves after me (its funnier in his voice)

[Guest]

'Where's the "Any" key?'

Homer, trying to figure out which key to hit on the keyboard in order to save the nuclear power plant from blowing up Springfield.

Koff

[Guest]

Oh yeah, I also like this one:

"I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me Superman."

[khuon]

It's hard to nail down any specific one so I will just defer to... http://www.doheth.co.uk/games/generator.shtml

Yes... I know there's a whole slew of these generators out there.

[BurntJoker]

Homer after Lisa suggests that his BBQ be vegetarian...
"If I went to a BBQ and there was no meat, I'd be like 'Yo, Goober, where's the meat?' I'm trying to impress people here Lisa. You don't win friends with salad."

[caloso]

Bart (chanting): You don't win friends with salad! You don't win friends with salad!

[BurntJoker]

Homer: "Got any of that beer that has candy floating in it? You know, Skittlebrau?"
Apu: "Such a beer does not exist, sir. I think you must have dreamed it."
Homer: "Oh. Well, then just give me a six-pack and a couple of bags of Skittles."

[danr]

"Mon père, quel bafoon." - Bart (translated, it is suppose to mean My father, what a bafoon.)
"You hear that Marge, my boy speaks French." - Homer

[mindbogger]

Its like i am wearing nothing at all, nothing at all, nothing at all.........damn sexy flanders - Homer

[mindbogger]

Zombie Flanders - Hey Homer, I feel a bit peckish. Mind if I chew on your ear?
(Homer Kills Flanders)
Bart - Dad! you killed Zombie Flanders
Homer - He was a Zombie?

[sarsparilla]

"Let me make some soothing ocean sounds for you; woosh, splash, caw caw, ARRGH MATEY!" - Homer