Jokes & Humor - Mommy, Mommy

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Chris L
02-21-04, 09:56 PM
Mommy, Mommy! What's a werewolf?

Shut up and comb your face!


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Mommy, Mommy! Billy won't let go of my ear.

Billy, let go of Susie's ear.

Billy! Let go of her ear!

All right Billy, give me the ear.


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Mommy, Mommy! I hate daddy's guts.

Well, just leave them on the side of the plate.


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Mommy, Mommy! Why is daddy so pale?

Shut up and keep digging.


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Mommy, Mommy! I don't like grandpa.

Well, just push him aside and eat your beans.

bg4533
02-21-04, 10:48 PM
You have a sick sense of humor. I laughed for a few though.
Chris L
02-22-04, 03:26 AM
Mommy, Mommy! What happened to all that dog food Fido wouldn't eat?

Shut up and eat your meat loaf.


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Mommy, Mommy! When are we going to have Aunt Edna for dinner?

Shut up, we haven't even finished your Grandmother yet.


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Mommy, Mommy! I hate my sister's guts.

Shut up and eat what's put in front of you.


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Mommy, Mommy! What is a deliquent child?

Shut up, light your cigarette, drink your whisky and deal those cards.


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Mommy, Mommy! What is a deliquent child?

Shut up and pass me the crowbar.

Chris L
02-22-04, 03:29 AM
Mommy, Mommy! Are you sure this is the way to make ginger bread men?

Shut up and get back in the oven.


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Mommy, Mommy! Are you sure this is the right way to cook Peking Duck?

Shut up and close the microvawe oven door behind you!


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Mommy, Mommy! What's for dinner?

Shut up and get back in the oven!


Mommy, Mommy! Why do I have to hop everywhere?

Shut up or I'll chop off the other leg!

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Mommy, Mommy! What happened to all your scabs?

Shut up and eat your cornflakes!


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Mommy, Mommy! What's in those CARE packages they send to Africa?

Shut up and get back in the box!
Zub Zub
02-23-04, 12:45 AM
Mommy, Mommy why do I keep going a round in circles?

Shut up or i'll nail your other to the floor.
Harry
02-23-04, 09:58 AM
Mammy, Mammy, can I lick the bowl?
Why can't you pull the chain like everybody else?

Mammy, Mammy can I play with Grandad?
No, and that's the last time I want you digging him up!

Mammy, Mammy, what's a homosexual?
Go ask you dad, she'll tell you!

My mother me me a homosexual!
If I gave her the wool would she make me one too?

What's the difference between a giraffe and a mechanical digger?
The digger has HYDRAULICS!

And the difference between a cart horse and a cavalry horse?
The cavalry horse DARTS INTO THE FRAY!