Fifty Plus (50+) - First Names and 50+'rs and Bicycling

First Names and 50+'rs and Bicycling

Well, forget about the "Bicycling." I only put that in to fool the mods.

Does it bother anyone else to be called by just about everyone by your first name? Never, "Mr. Fox."

This has become really prevalent in our society, particularly in MD's offices, but also at the barbershop and everywhere else.

(Cheers for the first person to find all the spelling errors in the poll - sorry I can't edit them out.)

Well.............its not a fair comparison...............my first name's not Dnvr.



edit: I have always assumed that the use of Mr. is a matter of respect more (but not only) appropriate to strangers or those that I am not completely familiar with. I become more uppity when people I don't know try the "first name", I can call you "first name" can't I gambit.

I generally don't mind it.

Until, they decide to put "Mr." in front of it, then snicker.

Perhaps this is a 65+ thing?

I'd much rather be called by my first name in just about any situation I can think of . . .

Rick / OCRR

I voted that it depends on how long they have known me. But I would say that it bothers me if the person I am talking to wants to be called Dr. X, then calls me by my first name. Just because they are a Dr doesn't give them a special place of respect in my book. If ya want formal make it both directions.

I work at a large hospital. It is policy here to use first names at all times, whether it is a patient, a DR. or even the COE of the corporation. It is odd for me with 27 years of Law Enforcement where it was stressed that we call everyone MR and Mrs when we addressed the public. So this has been a culture shock for me. I do not know wheter I like it or not.

I don't mind if they call me "Blazing" but it sounds weird to be called "Mr Pedals."

Perhaps this is a 65+ thing?
Better change your name to DnvrCurmudgeon

I voted that it depends on how long they have known me. But I would say that it bothers me if the person I am talking to wants to be called Dr. X, then calls me by my first name. Just because they are a Dr doesn't give them a special place of respect in my book. If ya want formal make it both directions.



+1

And, technically, I am Dr., also.

Call me anything but late for dinner.
Really it's quid pro qou, you want to be called Mr. or Dr. something, then use Mr. when addressing me.
If somebody calls me Mr., and I think its being overly formal, I say "call me Leo, Mr. R* is my father".
My dad is still alive, and he has earned the right to be called Mr., by everyone.

Ms D-------- is a school teacher; I'm Darla.

I work at a large hospital. It is policy here to use first names at all times, whether it is a patient, a DR. or even the COE of the corporation. It is odd for me with 27 years of Law Enforcement where it was stressed that we call everyone MR and Mrs when we addressed the public. So this has been a culture shock for me. I do not know wheter I like it or not.

That's an interesting policy. I suppose it's an attempt at being egalitarian, but it seems more likely to be potentially insulting to some people.

I think it's best to use a title unless you're otherwise sure. Remember Phillipians 2:3 - "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves."

my mom named me "Jim" rather than Mr. or Dr. I prefer people using my name.... the letters and titles before or after names are labels, not names.

be well,

jim

Makes me feel old if I'm addressed as Mr.

So I prefer the first name... unless being addressed by a child.

My Quaker sensibilities put me in the position of not minding being called by my first name, but I then call the one who addressed me as such by his or her first name. Then again, I don't stand when the judge enters the court room, I don't call my elected officials by any "special" title, I don't say a pledge to a flag, and I don't "solemnly swear" or take oaths. That said, I remember our family physician's reaction the first time I referred to him by his first name. He was somewhat taken aback. He said, "You know I earned the title." I responded that I earned the title of Kyōshi, and would gladly call him doctor if he would call me Kyōshi. He paused for a moment and said, "I forgot who I was talking to."

What really kills me is when an attractive young lady calls me "sir," as in: "Sir, we're running a special on geritol this week. It's in aisle five, sir."

It's nice to be treated with respect, but as long as they don't screw up the paperwork I don't care what they call me.

I have one of those last names that people stare at 'cause it's long and foreign... so I insist people call me by my first name however not my formal name. I hate Pamela, I am Pam thank you!

And please don't call me madam, ma'm, ms. miss, whatever if you know my name. I really hate that! :rolleyes:

I work at a large hospital. It is policy here to use first names at all times, whether it is a patient, a DR. or even the COE of the corporation. It is odd for me with 27 years of Law Enforcement where it was stressed that we call everyone MR and Mrs when we addressed the public. So this has been a culture shock for me. I do not know wheter I like it or not.

I sortof understand that. At work when I am dealing with a client I would never say "Joe" I would always say "Mr. So and So" unless requested to say "Joe" and even then I usually say "Mr..." Other work folks, even my boss is first name OK.

I do not especially like for people who work with me or for me to call me sir or Mr. and usually will gently ask them to just call me by my first name. What I don't think is very good customer relations is when I purchase something on my credit card and the young employee looks at my name on my card and calls me by my first name.

What really kills me is when an attractive young lady calls me "sir," as in: "Sir, we're running a special on geritol this week. It's in aisle five, sir."

Hot chicks usually call me by my first name and if they do not know it, make one up. If someone uses sir or Mr, there is a good chance I will not answer because I think they are talking to someone else.:D

I usually get addressed by my full name when at the doctor's, etc.

The regular service people I have call me by my first name, and that's OK.

But the guys at the Jiffy Lube should call me Ms. X, the punks.

99% of the people mispronounce our last name . . .

People can really really screw up my first name. I've been called "Lois" and "Louise" more times than I can remember.:twitchy::wtf:

I don't mind either way, but if someone insists I address him/her as "doctor", then I'd like to be addressed as "doctor" as well. I've earned it.

I was raised by the last southern gentleman who demanded I use formal address with everyone, no exceptions, until I had explicit invitation to do otherwise. I have found in life that this little trace of grace (and others like it) have served to form the first steps in honest relationships that otherwise would have begun with an unearned and often regretted familiarity. Call me "Billy" in the doc's office (or anywhere) and my "rip-off radar" lights up. It's "Mr. Bones", thanks, and I'll let you know when to call me "William".

Same with all the little traces of grace we've given up to be part of Mass Culture, including the loss of Elizabethan English in the Anglican Mass.

99% of the people mispronounce our last name . . .

And I thought you pronounced it

zonatandem!

I guess this is generational. To me, the use of the last name is an earned right - one I gladly give permission for, but I do like to be asked.

And, I do feel as if I am being treated sort of like a child in a Dr's office or other place when they call me by my first name without my permission. In my upbringing, children were called "Billy" or whatever, while adults were called Mr. or Mrs. or Miss.

Times change.

When did we go to first names as the apparently proper procedure?

Dr Fox,
Might I respectfully say that IMHO this is a stupid thread. If you or anyone else is hung up on this - get over it. Our society is getting less and less formal - I stopped wearing a tie into work 20 years ago - good riddens. About 10 years ago I started wearing tennis shoes and although I have not done so yet - many folks were wearing shorts into work this summer. Be comfortable with yourself and what others think or say becomes irrelevant.

Illegitimis non carborundum

Dr Fox,
Might I respectfully say that IMHO this is a stupid thread. If you or anyone else is hung up on this - get over it. Our society is getting less and less formal - I stopped wearing a tie into work 20 years ago - good riddens. About 10 years ago I started wearing tennis shoes and although I have not done so yet - many folks were wearing shorts into work this summer. Be comfortable with yourself and what others think or say becomes irrelevant.

Illegitimis non carborundum


Well, it won't be the first time I posted a stupid thread! And probably not the last.:D

"Let me count the ways!"

In general I'm a first-name guy--I don't particularly like to be called "Mister;" I prefer people using my first name.
Almost everybody gets it wrong, though. I was named for my father, and to avoid confusion, I've been known by my middle name all my life. Strangers don't know that, of course, and I use my real first name so seldom that I don't automatically respond to it in a waiting room or wherever.
Doctors' offices may be a special case, though. I don't mind them addressing me any way they want, but lately I've been corrected a couple of times for addressing a nurse and a physician by THEIR first names. Screw that. If they insist on being Dr. Jones, then I want to be Mr. Farley.

I must really be behind the times. I still think it looks odd to see people in church with short pants and flip flops on. Before you jump on me about this I realize that it has more to do with my upbringing than what is right or wrong. Oh, and if you think this is a silly thread go over to politics and have a look.

I don't really mind either way, as long as they don't call me sir.

We have many rednecks in pickup trucks around here and I prefer the names they call me to sir.

What really kills me is when an attractive young lady calls me "sir," as in: "Sir, we're running a special on geritol this week. It's in aisle five, sir."

I hate being called "sir" by just about anyone. Makes me feel old.:notamused:

99% of the people mispronounce our last name . . .

Well exactly.

Mind you, if my first name really was Boudicca I'd probably go with the last name.

Just a followup, when you do go to that doctor's office, and they ask Dnvr to come right in, do you address the doctor by his/her first name or his/her last name?

Or is it this strange mixture? I'm on first name terms with my family doctor when we're in the surgery, but when I call to make an appointment, I ask for an appointment with Dr Whatshername. And when she calls and leaves a message on my phone she always starts with "It's Dr Whatshername..."

(Names have been changed to protect the innocent)

I voted that it depends on how long they have known me. But I would say that it bothers me if the person I am talking to wants to be called Dr. X, then calls me by my first name. Just because they are a Dr doesn't give them a special place of respect in my book. If ya want formal make it both directions.


Bingo! I demand parity and equality. The moment a doctor or a teacher calls me by my first name, I take that as an open invitation to reciprocate.

At work, my boss's boss always calls me "Dr. John," and tells folks he is "just plain John." I try to level the playing field by referring to him as "Founder John." I have started calling the five other doctoral-level degree holders "Dr. Ivan," "Dr. Valeri," etc. to avoid being singled out too much.

I guess this is generational. To me, the use of the last name is an earned right - one I gladly give permission for, but I do like to be asked. ...

This reminds me of the movie, "The Paper Chase," in which John Houseman portrays an old-school college professor who insists on being called "Dr. X" or "Professor X," but in turn calls each of his students "Mr. X" or "Ms. X."

I work in a first-name office, but sometimes refer to coworkers as "Mr. X" or "Dr. X" as a diversion or because we have four Mikes, two Bills, three Jims, etc.

To me it depends on who is addressing me. I make a lot of exceptions but, in general, if you are a generation or more younger than me, I'd prefer to be called "Mister".

I drive a school bus. I very much dislike having some 13 year old call me by my first name as if I was one of their buddies. Most of the bus drivers go by "Mr. Bob" but I don't care for that either. Incidentally, I get a real good feeling when students who I haven't seen for a year or so remember me and call me by my proper sir name (I've got a rather long and difficult to pronounce name).

I once had a school principal, who is a stickler that everyone refer to her as Dr. -----, ask my name for some paperwork. I told her I was Mr. ----. She persisted in asking for my first name. My answer: Mister. Fair's fair.

In doctor's offices and the like I would prefer to be called by my last name but they never do it. My doctor even has a form that asks, among other things, how we would prefer to be addressed but then they ignore it. The last time I went to the doctor I dutifully filled out the form and wrote the nick name that I've suggested my school bus students use to call me: "Your Magisty"

What really kills me is when an attractive young lady calls me "sir," as in: "Sir, we're running a special on geritol this week. It's in aisle five, sir."

I hear you! Call me by my first name, last name, whatever, just don't call me "ma'am"! It makes me feel like I'm 90 (not that there's anything wrong with that!)

I voted that I like it, but I really don't mind either way.

We're getting accustomed to being called "you guys" by waitresses/waiters less than 1/2 our age, as in "What can I get you guys?".

Well actually I do prefer to be called "Mr. School" as opposed to "Old"...

I hate being called Mister Unterhausen. It's either my first name or Doctor Unterhausen.

Well.............its not a fair comparison...............my first name's not Dnvr.



edit: I have always assumed that the use of Mr. is a matter of respect more (but not only) appropriate to strangers or those that I am not completely familiar with. I become more uppity when people I don't know try the "first name", I can call you "first name" can't I gambit.

That's my MO as well -- my doc calls me Mrs. G____ and I respond with Dr. ____. As soon as someone in a professional setting calls my by my first name, I am sure to use theirs in response. Sometimes that elicits a certain look, but no one has called me on it -- after all, they started it.

So there. :p

I don't really like being called Mr. Dawg. I always think they are talking to my father. Blues is fine. I really hate it when I'm called by mister and my first name. They teach that to the kids at the church my son attends and it irritates the crap out of me every time I hear it.

I know many of the local medical doctors through bicycling and I always call them by their first name, even if they are treating me. Doctors that I only know professionally, I call Dr. whatever.

People always make minced meat out of my last name anyway, prefixing it with Mister only makes it worse, sort of like a tongue twister. My first name is easy to say. I have no preference either way.

This is what I do. Your critiques are welcome, as I am here to serve you.

1. When I met someone in the office I typically say, "How are you, Jane Doe? My name is Dr. Weak Link."

2. I don't encourage folks to use my first name on a professional basis. I don't get weird on them if they do, tho'.

3. I never address anyone older than I by their first name unless they tell me to.

4. I don't like people using my professional title when I'm not "on the job".

5. I don't like being addressed by my first name by people who don't know me.

6. That's it.

On a professional basis I've rarely seen or felt a problem with first names or last. In technical or marketing conversations, it's usually first names, because communication between peers is critical and the appropriate mental model. When being introduced as a presenter perhaps at a conference, "Mr. Fan" is appropriate. But a stranger's use of my complete first name, "Roadulus (Road for short)" sometimes seems condescending or obsequious.

It's not simple.

Dr Fox,
Might I respectfully say that IMHO this is a stupid thread. If you or anyone else is hung up on this - get over it. Our society is getting less and less formal - I stopped wearing a tie into work 20 years ago - good riddens. About 10 years ago I started wearing tennis shoes and although I have not done so yet - many folks were wearing shorts into work this summer. Be comfortable with yourself and what others think or say becomes irrelevant.

Illegitimis non carborundum

I sometimes wonder if there is any correlation between this observation and the oft repeated observation that the world is not as nice a place as the one we grew up in. I don't have the answer to the question. I suspect that Dnvr feels the "inappropriate" use of his first name is another of the many things pointing toward lack of respect for others in the modern world.