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09-11-09, 03:53 AM
A new element has been added to the Periodic Table:
Research has led to the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science.
The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neuron, 25 assistant neurons, 88 deputy neurons
and 198 assistant deputy neurons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.
These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities
of lepton-like particles called peons. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert;
however, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact.
A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction, that would normally take less than a second ,
to take from four days to four years to complete.
Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2-6 years; it does not decay, but instead undergoes regular reorganization
in which a portion of the assistant neurons and deputy neurons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium's mass will
actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neurons, forming isodopes.
This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed
whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical
morass. When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that
radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.
Research has led to the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science.
The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neuron, 25 assistant neurons, 88 deputy neurons
and 198 assistant deputy neurons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.
These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities
of lepton-like particles called peons. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert;
however, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact.
A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction, that would normally take less than a second ,
to take from four days to four years to complete.
Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2-6 years; it does not decay, but instead undergoes regular reorganization
in which a portion of the assistant neurons and deputy neurons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium's mass will
actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neurons, forming isodopes.
This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed
whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical
morass. When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that
radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.