Recreational & Family - Getting Yelled At

Since I have been out this past year riding with my child in a trailer, I'm getting yelled at. .. a lot ... usually by women. I am confused. Is it because I'm out, biking on the road, endangering the life of my child with each passing car? I never used to get yelled at and I'm not really liking it too much. What's with all the hatred?

I try to just grit my teeth and wave. It annoys me that some people feel that they have a degree of anonymity when driving past yelling obscenities at me or screaming to get on the MUP. Would they ever dare to voice their opinion in a face-to-face confrontation where I might get to voice my side of the argument?

some days just make me :notamused:

Seems to be a normal part of road riding.

I get the opposite reaction when i tow a trailer.

if you're not burning gas, you're gettn flamed.......

Could it be that you're riding on busier streets where people don't think you should be riding with a kid trailer?

The random getting-yelled-at is just a social thing. It happens to me when I walk the dog, too, it's not bike related. But sounds like you're getting into a bit more yelling than that.

I got beeped at today by a guy in a Jag. Two lanes in each direction, light traffic, plenty of room for him to move into the next lane to get around me. He beeped while still a ways back, like he expected/wanted me to get out of the way. I held my line. He changed lanes. We got stopped right after that at a red light, and I was actually ahead of him at that point. I just turned around and gave him The Look. :P

I got beeped at today by a guy in a Jag. Two lanes in each direction, light traffic, plenty of room for him to move into the next lane to get around me. He beeped while still a ways back, like he expected/wanted me to get out of the way. I held my line. He changed lanes. We got stopped right after that at a red light, and I was actually ahead of him at that point. I just turned around and gave him The Look. :P

you know, sometimes when ppl honk is to let you know that they are behind you/wanting to pass. I've done that a few times cause I couldnt tell if the cyclist knew I was behind them or not. Usually I do it when they don't get over to the edge. I'm not mad, just letting them know.

I'm cycling on the same roads as I always have, and at the same time of day. Without the trailer, I would get the occasional Flirty Male Acknowledgment Honk but this is a completely different monster. I try to ride mid to late morning when traffic is lightest and temperatures are warmest, which coincides with baby's nap time. And no, this is not the friendly 'I'm right back here behind you and gonna pass" kind of honk. This is nasty blaring horns with windows rolled down with people yelling at me. <sigh>

No ... this is definitely a reaction to the trailer. I'm more apt to be yelled at when out riding the tandem with baby in tow than when I'm on my single .. but all the same .. it is usually by women telling me I'm 'crazy' or it is the "stupidest thing I ever saw" or to "get on the bike path". Tandem moves pretty quickly, averaging 20+ with the trailer in tow. Perhaps it is an objection to going fast? I honestly don't see how my speed makes any difference to the safety of my child. If a car hits us from behind, whether we are going 10 or 25 ... it is gonna hurt the same.

Hairnet, what kind of reaction are You getting? Maybe I should be doing something different... :p

you know, sometimes when ppl honk is to let you know that they are behind you/wanting to pass. I've done that a few times cause I couldnt tell if the cyclist knew I was behind them or not. Usually I do it when they don't get over to the edge. I'm not mad, just letting them know.

That thought occurred to me as well. And it even sounded like that kind of honk. But.... he honked a long way back (comparatively speaking), then changed lanes. If he was doing a full lane change, why honk? The only reason I could come up with is that he wanted me to move out of the lane and let him pass without him having to change lanes. Not overly aggressive by any means, and he maybe meant it in a friendly way, but the message still came across as, "I'm coming, please get out of my way."

maybe try putting a sign on your back that says "honk or yell if you're stupid" or something. dunno, the passive agressive that I am, I'd prob just flip them the bird. really, YOU are not doing anything dangerous, its the idiots that are making things dangerous by distracting you.

My wife and I only ever use our trailer to pull the little guy if we are on one of the nice paved bike paths here in our area, or just strolling our neighborhood. Not that they have any right to blast obsenities at you, but I could never take my little one near the highway, just to risky, concidering how the trailer takes up alot more of the road than just a single bike, one careless teenager looks down to punch in a text and no more little one, forever. I live in a transient military town and you wanta talk about careless drivers, I have plenty of stories! This town is a nightmare to drive in, horrible enough driving a car around. Where I live, alot of both, motorcycles and bicyclist are hit regularly.

Doesn't exactly pertain to the thread, but this Friday my workplace is giving all employees a frozen turkey for Thanksgiving. In contemplating how I'm going to get this thing home, I decided I'd just pull the child's trailer to work that day and strap it in for the ride back.

Because I'm ornery, I'm planning on taking the busiest routes home to see if anyone freaks out on me for endangering the life of a frozen turkey. Should stay frozen, the temps are supposed to be in the 20s. :D

Doesn't exactly pertain to the thread, but this Friday my workplace is giving all employees a frozen turkey for Thanksgiving..... Should stay frozen, the temps are supposed to be in the 20s. :D
I remember one year the place i worked for did that. Since i didn't have any room in my freezer I was very grateful for the freeze we had that year for Christmas (This was in Austin, TX) When I got home I just hung the turkey outside my door on a hook on the wall. Stayed frozen there for the next two days.

You want honk? Here's honk: I do a local radio show, and a few months ago, for a segment on a anti-teen pregnancy program, I carried a "baby" for 24 hours, a doll that cried, wet its diaper and had to be tended like a real infant. I have two kids in their 20s, so I know the tricks, but it was still a pain.
I'd ridden the bike to work the day i got the baby, so on the way home I stuck it in a backpack with its little unhelmeted head sticking up and headed out the 12 uphill miles, two of them on a freeway shoulder that has a painted bike lane but no real provisions for cyclists. Twenty-five or 30 people must have honked or waved or shouted at me, two stopped to lecture me and one must have called the cops, because a couple of miles from home I got pulled over for investigation of reported child neglect.

At least they aren't shooting at you, like happened in my town several weeks ago to a father towing his son and riding with his wife! I really wish people would consider just how they'd feel for the rest of their lives if their bravado and aggression resulted in death or serious injury. But then, most people don't consider the consequences of sending in the military to swat a fly with a sledgehammer, so I guess I'll have to keep wishing.
-CC

There is no way I would pull my kid down a busy road. I would mainly just stick to the paved trails or the neighborhood. Not worth taking a chance on my kids life or getting arrested for child neglect. Plus I have a short fuse when it comes to obnoxious people, so the less people honk and yell at me the less likely I am to do something I might regret. Good luck out there.

Are the women yelling at you large in the girth department???

Are the women yelling at you large in the girth department???

What he said and are they driving minivans or massively huge SUV's

VeloDog, Sorry but I had to chuckle at your story of baby (doll) poking out of backpack. Must have been quite the sight.:p

The roads I cycle on are definitely not 'busy' roads ... and even less so when I choose to go out. Probably more soccer moms driving SUVs than anyone else. On one hand I'm glad that people are on the look out for safety issues when it involves children (as VeloDog found out there are plenty of them) but on the other, it kinda ticks me off when others are judging me as a parent and the choices I am making. Yeah, I understand I can't have it both ways but that doesn't mean I can't want it.

In no particular order I think it is a combination of any of these elements:

1. Legitimate concern for safety. Either they think I am not responsible enough bike handler to cycle with traffic OR they don't trust their own abilities enough to maneuver around me OR they worry that the teenage driver texting behind them will clip me and trailer. Believe me, I worry about that too. But we could also get run over as we walk across the street to fetch our mail ...

2. Jealousy/anger/envy. Perhaps they made the choice Not to exercise during pregnancy or when they had little ones underfoot. Perhaps they still aren't exercising even though their kids are in highschool and it just ticks them off that I am doing my body good. Having exercised right through 3 pregnancies, it is amazing how many women resent that. They might slip their anger/envy under the guise of being protective and concern, but I don't buy it.

3. Women, especially mothers, judge other women/mothers. Period. As much as we would like to think that we don't ... we do. Even if it isn't mean-spirited, we observe another woman's choice with her children and within an instant make a judgment and decide whether or not that is something that we consider appropriate and should we or should we not envelope that technique/approach/etc. into our own bag of tricks. Other women/mothers take it to a whole other level.

I dunno. I'll just keep smiling and waving to let them know I acknowledge their existence. Outdoor cycling season is nearly over here and I'm ready to convert my trailer onto skis so I can snowshoe and cross-country ski with him when the snow starts to fall.

if you're not burning gas, you're gettn flamed.......

Plus 1.
.. It takes a lot of aggression on the part of the cagers to put me over the edge; but , once in a great while the bird salute is just impossible to not use in response.

If these people are really being over the top rude to you get the plate number, call 911, and file a police report. I know this sounds a bit extreme but they really have absolutely no right to treat you and your baby this way and it is illegal to harass people in this manner. The police where I live will run the plate number and tell the motorist there has been a complaint filed and they shouldn't yell at people. This will probably stop them from doing this again. Not only are they being rude but they are creating a safety hazard by their actions. People need to know that they are not anonymous like they think they are - they have a license plate and they can be held accountable for their actions. They only keep doing s**t like this because no one has ever turned them in.

I haven't reads the whole thread, but like 10Wheels said, it's a pretty standard thing.

I get it every now and then. People driving too close, beeping their horns, I've even had a half-eaten doughnut thrown at me..

Made me a bit nervous at first but I just accepted that there are always going to be haters about.. whatever I'm doing, whether it's cycling or just walking down the street. Sounds simple but just ignoring it is the best thing to do.

It's funny how many people's perceptions of bicycling are so much different from mine! I've ridden many thousands of miles in many countries throughout the world and have had no problems whatsoever - except a couple miles from my home in Boise, Idaho! And yet, so many people think it's dangerous. I don't get it.

We are cycling from Alaska to Argentina with our 12-year-old boys and some people have accused us of abuse and all that jazz. I guess it's OK for the boys to ride their bikes in Boise, but nowhere else!

Just ignore the honkers and know that you are doing right by taking your little one out.

People are so strange. Do you have a flag on your trailer? I find that people honk more when you are pulling a trailer, than when you have a little one in a seat on your bike. I think the trailer flag helps, but doesn't eliminate the problem.

There also seems to be the idea that cyclists should pull off the road when someone want to pass. I admit that I thought that at one point myself. Only once I began cycling did I do the research and learn the laws.

Do you have a flag on your trailer?

That's what I was wondering...Most of the trailers I've seen are much lower to the ground than an adult on a bike. I would imagine the trailer is much more difficult to see in traffic until you're right up on it.

Do you have a flag on your trailer?
oh yes indeed. Flag sits at same height as our helmets so I'm thinking of adding a fluorescent sleeve to rear of trailer to increase visibility.

If you're going to be out there with your kid in traffic, you better get more than a flag. Nothing less than a Dinotte will do and I'm with the camp that says no way am I pulling a child around in any significant traffic whatsoever unless it's an emergency type situation.

Do you use a mirror? How good are you at reading traffic and knowing what to look for? You better be good.

I use my trailer for my dogs and I wouldn't pull them around in traffic either. Sorry.

You want honk? Here's honk: I carried a "baby" for 24 hours, a doll that cried, wet its diaper and had to be tended like a real infant. ....I'd ridden the bike to work the day i got the baby, so on the way home I stuck it in a backpack with its little unhelmeted head sticking up and headed out the 12 uphill miles, two of them on a freeway shoulder that has a painted bike lane but no real provisions for cyclists.

Man, I started laughing at my desk, 'bout lost my swallow of coffee! That is hilarious - since it WAS a doll of course!
I get the honks like most others that post here, but being in a smaller town, it seems most of the people that honk at me are friends! After giving the finger to a couple of friends and my boss, I just smile and wave at EVERYONE that honks now. Friends wave back, and if it IS someone that has their butt on their shoulders, it just ticks them off worse - a win/win solution for me!

Just do like I do and carry a cat stuffed in your shirt. Pull him out when you get yelled at and go, "Awww look at how cute he is! Musha musha kitty!"

I find it funny people think using a bike is dangerous compared to a car, but the numbers don't back that up at all.

The South Carolina Driver's Handbook actually encourages drivers to honk when approaching a cyclist from behind.

I walk my dogs every morning, year round and have almost been hit or been aggressively honked at by .... wait for it.... ladies in SUV's/mini vans talking on their cell phones! I've also been nearly forced off the road by the same. Maybe they are more in a hurry, more harried, more judgmental, etc. Who knows? Maybe it's because more of them are on the road at a particular time too?

PS - We don't have sidewalks, mups, in my particular neighborhood. To get anywhere you have to walk along a roadway or cut across a field filled with tumbleweeds.

The world has changed since we were kids. Parents are more afraid of the .001% event that might happen than the bad things that are much more likely to happen.

Nowdays if you let your child walk a block to school you will get yelled at and some will even call the cops on you.

It might be the 24 hour news media scaring the crap out of them, or some other reason, but people don't seem to be able to put things in perspective and truly analyze what is dangerous and risk management.

So don't sweat it.

There is lots of hostility to cyclists. There are a lot of people that seem to think city streets are for vehicles only, NOT BICYCLES. When I ride my bike with no trailer it makes people mad some drives try to see how close they can get to me. I think they are trying to scare me so I will stay off the street. One person got so close their rear view mirrow bumped my arm as they went by. Now I pull a child trailer but with no children I use it to haul groceries, I go to the hardware store, bank, lumber yard, library, mall, restaruant, lots of places. Now people honk the horn an yell at me to get off the road. Lots if fat lazy ill mannered people, bad manners of people of all ages who seem to think the street is just for them and I don't belong there. It might make them 2 seconds late if they have to slow down a bit for me and that makes them mad. State Law says, 4 ft of the street weather marked as a bike lane or not is for bicycles, wheel chairs, baby stroller, and so forth. A vehicle must pass with a clearance of 3 ft. Try to park a bike at the mall, grocery store and many other places there are no bike racks and plenty of signs that say, NO BICYCLES. Is a bicycle legal transportation???? Do I have a right to ride my bike instead of driving a vehicle??? Do I have a right to get exercise and enjoy the fresh air and nice weather??? I pay taxes too!!!

I'm guessing that alot of those "no bicycles" signs are because there were too many punk kids hanging around. So they figured the easiest solution would be to not allow bikes anymore. Just a theory, but thats how it usually goes, some dumb ****s ruins it for everyone else.

I appreciate the honks, I am mostly deaf in my left ear and about half deaf in the right. So honk at me all you want. It does scare me some times.

Women give birth to a 7-ish pound baby, then buy a gigantic van or suv capable of hauling 10 people, and insist its for the safety of their child. These same people drive around in these monstrosities gabbing away with their girlfriends about the latest drama on the soaps, or isn't cute how little jonny had a green poop the other day....the list goes on. Women become a parent, and it seems a significant number of them now become judge/jury/executioner about anything they see that they don't like just because they think they know everything about parenting.

These people are to be ignored and pitied for their narrow views. Do what you want and feel is safe. As long as you are legal, and being reasonable about safety precautions, other people's ignorant judgement is irrelevant.

A flag with a trailer would definitely be required in my mind, if not by law in some area somewhere. I plan on installing one when my kids are ready for a hike a bike as well. Cyclists are too vulnerable to not be as visible as possible!

A flag with a trailer would definitely be required in my mind, if not by law in some area somewhere. I plan on installing one when my kids are ready for a hike a bike as well. Cyclists are too vulnerable to not be as visible as possible!

It is good to be as visible as possible. I have a low racer bike I will NOT ride on the city streets just because it is so low and not visible.

I have another recumbent bike I ride all over town. I had a police office stop me once and tell me that he did not want to see me riding this bike on the city streets ever again because my visiblity is low and the bike is unsafe. I learned long ago to play their game and agree then keep riding anyway. I only ride where I feel safe seveal streets in town the speed limit is 45 and people drive 50 and 55 so I will not ride my bike on that street. If there is a sidewalk I will ride there.

I had a police office stop me once and tell me that he did not want to see me riding this bike on the city streets ever again because my visiblity is low and the bike is unsafe. Yet the ignorant cop had no problem seeing you!

Put a Baby on Board sign on your trailer along with "shhh no honking baby sleeping". If you feel your kids are safe and there is optimal passing room for cars to pass safely then just keep doing what you're doing.

Commuting to my kids preschool on bike was how I lost my baby weight. Strapped the (then) 3 year old in and the baby in a car seat off we went and off went the lbs.

Glad to see another mommy out there hauling kids. :thumb:

... i got the baby, so on the way home I stuck it in a backpack with its little unhelmeted head sticking up and headed out the 12 uphill miles, two of them on a freeway shoulder that has a painted bike lane but no real provisions for cyclists.

Pretty funny.


After giving the finger to a couple of friends and my boss, I just smile and wave at EVERYONE that honks now.

Hilarious.

P.S.: Yes, I know this thread is old. I didn't resurrect it.

Try to park a bike at the mall, grocery store and many other places there are no bike racks and plenty of signs that say, NO BICYCLES.

If it's a chain store, and especially if headquarters is in a bike-friendly area, a well-written letter to HQ will often get the local store manager put in his place.

For a mall, write to the owners of the sporting goods stores, health food stores, etc. Several stores demanding a rule change will get it most of the time. Be sure to point out that loitering laws already exist to deal with the BMX kiddies.

Pretty funny.



Hilarious.

P.S.: Yes, I know this thread is old. I didn't resurrect it.

oops sorry didn't know it was old. Is there some kind of punishment for resurrecting old threads :innocent:

Is there some kind of punishment for resurrecting old threads :innocent:

I doubt it, but people like to point it out. I suppose it it's insignificant so long as someone isn't posting a reply to an old post and expecting a dialogue back from the original poster when he/she likely isn't watching the thread anymore.

I'm watching. :D
Well not really ... but am always interested if someone has a new strategy.

You want honk? Here's honk: I do a local radio show, and a few months ago, for a segment on a anti-teen pregnancy program, I carried a "baby" for 24 hours, a doll that cried, wet its diaper and had to be tended like a real infant. I have two kids in their 20s, so I know the tricks, but it was still a pain.
I'd ridden the bike to work the day i got the baby, so on the way home I stuck it in a backpack with its little unhelmeted head sticking up and headed out the 12 uphill miles, two of them on a freeway shoulder that has a painted bike lane but no real provisions for cyclists. Twenty-five or 30 people must have honked or waved or shouted at me, two stopped to lecture me and one must have called the cops, because a couple of miles from home I got pulled over for investigation of reported child neglect.

You shouldnt have shared that story. So many thoughts and plans now fill my mind. . .

Since I have been out this past year riding with my child in a trailer, I'm getting yelled at. .. a lot ... usually by women. I am confused. Is it because I'm out, biking on the road, endangering the life of my child with each passing car? I never used to get yelled at and I'm not really liking it too much. What's with all the hatred?

I try to just grit my teeth and wave. It annoys me that some people feel that they have a degree of anonymity when driving past yelling obscenities at me or screaming to get on the MUP. Would they ever dare to voice their opinion in a face-to-face confrontation where I might get to voice my side of the argument?

some days just make me :notamused:

Most people think city streets are for motor vehicles not bicycles. The walk/bike path is for bicycles and walkers. But some of the people that walk on the bike path think the path is for walkers only not bicycles so I get yelled at there too. I like to point out to people that complain that they are braking the rules by walking 4 people side by side using up the full width of the path it blocks people from passing and people walk on the wrong side of the path.

great doll story!

When drivers honk and yell random crap out their car windows, they are merely acknowledging their mothers' contraceptive failures. They're screaming "I should never have been conceived!" but you can't make out the words because of the Doppler Effect (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Doppler_effect), you know.

i really hate people that yell and honk but I'm deaf in my left ear so I guess it doesn't matter. Surprises the crap out of me though.
I just blow kisses at them.

Do you have better legs than they do?