Singlespeed & Fixed Gear - Infuriated by brakes

I'm running a Weinmann 605 front brake and I've been tinkering with it for 3 hours trying to figure out how to make it work. When I pull the brake lever, it just shifts the entire brake over to the right side, and the wheel only makes contact with one caliper, while the other caliper is totally far away. What I'm trying to describe is that instead of "squeezing" my wheel, my brake system just moves/tilts over one direction. I'm using this *******: http://www.velo-pages.com/main.php?g2_view=core.DownloadItem&g2_itemId=28984&g2_serialNumber=2
Halp me please.

Try calling 1-607-652-7171

Which direction does it tilt?

But really, these are instructions (http://techdocs.shimano.com/media/techdocs/content/cycle/SI/Dura-Ace/BrakeSystem/SI-8FA0H-ENG_v1_m56577569830605105.pdf). Shimano, but it might halp.

Which direction does it tilt?
If you're sitting on the bike seat, to the right. Same side the brake cable runs.

Might be stupid...does it have a spring in/behind the brake arms?

Compensate for that motion, with a wrench.

Might be stupid...does it have a spring in/behind the brake arms?
Yes, and it's totally asinine.

http://www.brendanmcgetrick.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/shower-cat.jpg

Your picture leads me to believe that I'm done like dinner...

A little to the left. :)

I've had this issue before and perhaps I can help?

There are two nuts on the main threaded shaft of the brake, one that bolts it to the fork (lets refer to it as the back), and one that bolts the arms together and keeps it all from popping off the front (or... the front). The bolt on the front will squeeze down the two arms and make relative motion difficult. Try tightening that one up. The back one will squeeze it tight on the fork, thus making 'spinning' of the whole assembly more difficult, crank that baby down.
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I've had this issue before and perhaps I can help?

There are two nuts on the main threaded shaft of the brake, one that bolts it to the fork (lets refer to it as the back), and one that bolts the arms together and keeps it all from popping off the front (or... the front). The bolt on the front will squeeze down the two arms and make relative motion difficult. Try tightening that one up. The back one will squeeze it tight on the fork, thus making 'spinning' of the whole assembly more difficult, crank that baby down.

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Cranked dat "back" bolt down hard, tried adjusting the front bolt, but it didn't really do anything. For the record, there appears to be an immense amount of pressure on the left brake arm (from the spring) while the right one is barely even touching the spring.

Try to loosen the back bolt and center the brake and...profit?

Parhaps the spring isn't sitting correctly in the spacer/spring holder correctly? Take the arms off, check to see if the spring is centered on its own?

Parhaps the spring isn't sitting correctly in the spacer/spring holder correctly? Take the arms off, check to see if the spring is centered on its own?
It's centered on its own.

when you squeeze the two brake arms together with your hand, do they both move or only the one?

Try to loosen the back bolt and center the brake and...profit?
Mind numbing debt. It's already centered.

Right now, only the right side moves. The other one can't because of the tension from the brake cable.

spend 20 dollars and get a dual pivot tektro. It will work 100000000 times better and be 100000000 times easier to maintain and take on and off.

OK GUYZ IS OK. I was being a dingus and I didn't realize you have to have the brake cable/housing actually running STRAIGHT to the brake assembly (as seen in the picture.) I had it going through this piece attached to the headset.

major lowel.

sigh... wow...