Jokes & Humor - You know you're living in 2004 when...

You enter your password in the microwave.

You haven't played patience with real cards in years.


You have 15 phone numbers for your family of three.


You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.


Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses.



You've sat at the same desk for four years and worked for three different companies.


You learn you're redundant on the 11pm news.



Every television commercial has a website at the bottom of the screen.


Leaving the house without your mobile phone, which wasn't invented for the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around and go home to get it.


You get up in the morning and go online before getting your coffee.


You start tilting your head sideways to smile.

You enter your password in the microwave.
No. Do people still use microwaves?



You haven't played patience with real cards in years.
I prefer FreeCell :)



You have 15 phone numbers for your family of three.
Virtually!



You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.
Of course :)



Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses.
It's more laziness to be honest.



You've sat at the same desk for four years and worked for three different companies.
I hope not I'm a co-owner! :)



You learn you're redundant on the 11pm news.
Who's up that late?



Every television commercial has a website at the bottom of the screen.
Another reason to do something else.... :)


Leaving the house without your mobile phone, which wasn't invented for the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around and go home to get it.
Don't have one... *deep breath*



You get up in the morning and go online before getting your coffee.
I drink tea and avoid going online unless something's gone wrong.



You start tilting your head sideways to smile.
It's more a coy kind of thing :)

You enter your password in the microwave.

You try to remotely log into your microwave from another appliance. (Note that there are some microwaves now where this is possible)



You haven't played patience with real cards in years.

You have no patience for playing patience.



You have 15 phone numbers for your family of three.

You rarely call your family members because you converse with them over email, IM and IRC.



You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.

You talk to your wife over IRC even when she's sitting on the couch next to you.



Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses.

Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they're filtering email messages from you because you keep sending them FRP (Frequently Reposted Posts).



You've sat at the same desk for four years and worked for three different companies.

You've been laid off by three different companies who have declared bankruptcy in the past four years.



You learn you're redundant on the 11pm news.

You learn you're redundant on the 11AM news.



Every television commercial has a website at the bottom of the screen.

Every television commercial has an out-of-date website at the bottom of the screen.



Leaving the house without your mobile phone, which wasn't invented for the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around and go home to get it.

Leaving the house without your mobile phone, which wasn't invented for the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for a shrug as you pull out your spare mobile handset.



You get up in the morning and go online before getting your coffee.

You get up in the morning and go online to pre-order your coffee.




You start tilting your head sideways to smile.

You never smile.

You get up in the morning and go online before getting your coffee.


You get up in the morning and go online to pre-order your coffee.


You get up in the morning and log into eStarbuck, but
- your favorite brand is in backorder
- the spanky -10% discount code you spotted from CoffeeForums is no longer valid
- they still deliver by USPS, and last time they messed up your coffee real bad

So you go to the Pret-A-Manger round the corner and buy a cup of coffee and whine about how much more expensive it is there compared to the 'net. And while you're there waiting (oh, horrors!) you ask them to loan their juice press, just for a couple of hours so that you can squeeze your fresh morning orange juice. It's not like they're using it all the time, right?

--J

The person next to you in the supermarket, video store, or public restroom appears to be talking to themselves in a loud voice and you don’t assume they are crazy.

The world's best golfer is black, the favorite rapper is white, and the Germans aren't looking for war.




On a side note...

When you can hold teleconfrence while eating a five course meal...while incidentally on the interstate.




Also...

When washing machines have creditcard swipes.



Or...

Class has been canceled because of 'technical difficulties' while there is still a perfectly good blackboard and chalk on the wall.




Not to mention...

Fast food restaraunts have wireless internet hookups for patrons.

The world's best golfer is black, the favorite rapper is white, and the Germans aren't looking for war.

Oh Boy, I laughed hard at that one!


Class has been canceled because of 'technical difficulties' while there is still a perfectly good blackboard and chalk on the wall.

yeah, I know thats the truth

You enter your password in the microwave.
Nope, but I tried to use my work's swipecard on the vending machines :)

You haven't played patience with real cards in years.
When the first thought of any new technology is "can it play pong", does that count?

You have 15 phone numbers for your family of three.
amazingly, not yet.

You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.
No, but I have had an IP-audio conference with the guy at the desk next to me...who happens to be in hand slapping distance.

Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses.
My reason for not staying in touch with friends is the poor quality of cell phones...i cant get calls while i'm stuck at work, or in some areas of my apt.


You've sat at the same desk for four years and worked for three different companies.
nope...two so far :)

You learn you're redundant on the 11pm news.
Heh, I know I'm redundant....Imagins if waldo was cloned, and was fat...that would some somewht similar to me....be afraid, yes, be very very afraid, muhahahahaha


Every television commercial has a website at the bottom of the screen.
How about when every porn mag has one? :(

Leaving the house without your mobile phone, which wasn't invented for the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around and go home to get it.
Ditto....I would be willing to leave a building without a testicle before I leave without my phone.

You get up in the morning and go online before getting your coffee.
Heck I check my email before my morning bathroom run...as painful as it is, I must flush my spambox!!!!

You start tilting your head sideways to smile.
Once your head stays in that sideways tilt, it becomes truly scary.

oh, some more....

....when your remote control actually displays a detailed error message complete with memory dump.

....when you realize you dont have any batteries for your flashligh, but just happen to have enough UPS power to run the light via AC adaptor.

....when your car has 12 times more electronics than the cars 20 years ago did, let alone the rockets that sent man to the moon, but it STILL wont let you know your too close to the --------- curb.

...when your cat can type faster than you.

...when your cat applied for your job.

....and got it.