A married man goes into the confessional and says to his priest, "I
almost had an affair with a woman."

The priest says, "What do you mean, almost?"

The man says, "Well, we got undressed and rubbed together, but then I
stopped."

The priest says, "Rubbing together is the same as putting it in.
You're not to see that woman again. For your penance, say five Hail
Mary's and put $50 in the poor box."

The man leaves the confessional, says his prayers, and then walks
over to the poor box. He pauses for a moment and then starts to leave.

The priest, who was watching, quickly runs over to him saying, "I saw
that you didn't put any money in the poor box!"

The man replies, "Yeah, but I rubbed the $50 on the box, and
apparently that's the same as putting it in."