Jokes & Humor - How about just the set up?

There's a nice thread a few pages back That trackhub started and it wants only the punchline (http://www.bikeforums.net/showthread.php/324826-Just-tell-the-punchline) and I think it might be fun to post only the set up too.

Keep it clean but if you know the punchline post it!

For example:

A guy walks into a pharmacy and asks "Have you got cotton balls?"

A guy walks into a pharmacy and asks "Have you got cotton balls?"

The pharmacist says "What is this a joke?"

Hmm,,,, I like it.:D

So this hunter is determined to go to Montana and bag himself the biggest, baddest Grizzly bear he can find....

A young dude is all depressed because his girlfriend dumped him. So he joins the French Foreign Legion. After a few months in the desert, he gets...lonely. So he asks the sergeant what he should do. The sergeant says, "Monsieur, we always use the Camel..."

Captain Bravado and his red shirt. No further setup needed.:D

Wait, What's the Captain Bravado and the red shirt? Don't know that one...

Wait, What's the Captain Bravado and the red shirt? Don't know that one...

Ahh,,,,

Long ago, on the south seas, a ship was sailing along, under the command of a young captain, by the name of "Captain Bravado". One day, the captain spies a pirate ship on the horizon, heading right for them. Captain Bravado collapsed his telescope, and said to his first mate, "Bring me my red shirt". The first mate was a little confused, but hurried off to the captain's cabin, and returned with a bright red shirt, which the captain quickly donned.

Shortly, the pirate ship came alongside, and a horde of nasty cutthroats swung over on ropes, engaging Bravado and his men in a fierce fight. But, Bravado and his men were victorious, sending the scurvy dogs to a watery grave.

Later that evening, the men were celebrating their victory over food and wine. One of the men was curious, and asked the captain why he changed to a red shirt just before battle. "Men, if I had been wounded in battle, the red shirt would hide the bleeding wound. You would not know your captain had been wounded, and you would have fought on."

The men were in awe at their young captain's bravery. One old sailor raised his mug and said "Here's to Captain Bravado, the bravest man alive". And all agreed, heartily.

The next day, the first mate was scanning the horizon for more pirates. Suddenly, he spotted not one, not two, not three, but five pirate ships, heading right for them.
Captain Bravado looked sternly at the horizon, obviously in deep thought. The first mate, asked, "Sir, shall I bring you your red shirt?"

"No", the captain responded hoarsely. "Bring me my brown pants". :D

Now you know.

:lol::roflmao2::lol::thumb:

A guy walks into a bar...

and says "Ouch, I didn't see that!"

This guy's girlfriend dumps him because he's not "manly" enough for her. So, in order to prove how manly he is, he decides to take up hunting grizzly bears. He heads off to Montana, and gets himself totally outfitted with everything he needs, including the most powerful hunting rifle made. So, he's in the woods for days, before finally spotting a huge grizzly....

BEAVER! A huge grizzly beaver! He takes his hunting rifle out and blasts 5-7 shots into it. After the smoke clears he realizes he was actually in the jungle. He looks up at her and says, " I told you beaver hunting is manly."

This young sailor, only a few months out of basic training, and on his first ship assignment, was taking shower on board the ship one day. The only other sailor taking a shower was an old salt, with 20 years in, most of it as sea. The old salt asks the young sailor if he had ever seen "The battleship with wheels...."

A guy walks into a bar...

...and says "Bartender, give me a dozen beers, I just had my first **** ***!"

...and says "Bartender, give me a dozen beers, I just had my first **** ***!"

Ant the bartender says, "you might want to try some whiskey, not even 12 beers will take the taste out of your mouth".

A toasted cheese sandwich walks into a bar. The bartender says...