Clydesdales/Athenas (200+ lb / 91+ kg) - Did people take you seriously when you started?

Hi all! I'm not exactly new but I sort of got away from the bike for a bit. Actually, I was using an indoor bike - now I'm using a REAL bike and I love it! So I came back!

I'm a big gal - I'm hovering just under 270 on a 5'5" frame. I have gotten great support from some people in my life but there are some people who seriously seem to think that my desire to get healthier by riding is "cute" somehow. It's possible that I'm overly sensitive - and maybe I don't trust myself yet that I really am in this for the long haul.

Did people make rude, but well-meaning comments when you were starting? Did they stop as you stuck with it? :)

My 80 year old neighbor laughed at me this morning as I bombed up the hill to our place. I have no idea if the laugh was a good laugh or a laugh at me laugh.

My 70 year old neighbor tries to sabotage my weight loss by bringing over baked goods and saying that I don't need to lose weight. Or that I've lost enough. She also thinks my bike is a "boys" bike with a "boys" seat as it has a cutout. She isn't intentionally rude, she just is extremely puzzled.

My extremely fit cousin thinks that I now I am exercising I should be able to join her on 20 mile rides and keep up. I can't keep up with her even when walking. She has no understanding of what it is like to come from no fitness. I am tired of turning down all the offers to do active things with her but I have to because she leaves me behind. :(

I stopped by my old place of employment to visit former coworkers. They had not seen me for quit a while and I had dropped 15% of my weight. That is a noticeable amount. No one said anything about weight loss or looking good or whatever.

OK, I'm done venting!

Glad to hear you are enjoying getting into biking!

Who do you mean when you say "people" anyway? Strangers? Friends? Random idiots driving by in a car yelling "nice a$$" out the window?

And you may be a little over sensitive, but stick around here and you'll get plenty of supporting comments. I would consider that "friends" who try to hold you back are not very good friends.

And I agree that using a real bike is far superior to some dumb stationary bike. I hate working hard and no moving. Drives me nuts.

Good luck!

Yep. I wrote most of those types of comments off as one of a number of things: simple insensitivity, jealousy (from Clydes/Athenas who didn't have the gumption to make a change), intellectual ignorance (of the effect their comments might have), and the like. Also, people generally don't like "change" - your lifestyle change is forcing them to make adjustments (from their perspective). After a while, most of the silly/hurtful comments stop.

A couple people continued to make comments longer than others. Ultimately I wrote it off as jealousy of even my limited results or fear of change on their part. Shrug. I ignore the comments for the most part and rarely respond other than to invite them along for a ride on one of my easy days.

I've adopted the perspective of - lead, follow or get the heck out of the way.

goldfinch! I have the same problem you have with your cousin with my group. I'm doing Team In Training (we raise money for The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society while training for an endurance event).

Not everyone in my group has done a triathlon before (we're doing the Chicago Triathlon) but they're ALL in better shape than me. They have to work hard too, don't get me wrong, but they don't seem to understand that this 15-20 mile ride we're supposed to do Saturday morning may actually kill me. They're excited after a 3 mile run - I'm panting (and I didn't run the whole 3 miles)! The only thing I seem to be okay with is the swimming - I'm slow but I get it done, whereas some of our marathon runners and the like have to stop and stand every few laps. Maybe fat helps you float? :)

I do hate when one of the coaches seems to feel they have to stick with me when I'm so slow - I feel so out of place. I try to remember, though, that at least I'm out there doing it. I have to start somewhere. If I wait till I'm in great shape to do this, I'll never do it!

I haven't had any comments or actions towards me in support or non-support that I've noticed.

No one I know said anything to me until I'd lost about 40 pounds. That seemed to be the threshold of noticing, or commenting anyway, at least for someone my size (5'-10" male, starting around 270 or so). And everyone has been uniformly supportive, though I'm getting now to the point where they're starting to say things like they can't imagine me losing another 25 or 30, which I still need to do. I just smile at them and say, "you haven't seen me naked." That usually shuts them up.

When I made the decision to change my lifestyle and lose weight, I was greeted with a lot of here we go again looks from friends and colleagues. I don't really blame them, over the last 15-20 years I have been constantly going on and off fad diets, work out regimes etc and my weight yo-yo'd like crazy.

It took about 9 months and 50lbs to start eliciting comments about my weight loss and the change in my body shape. I still think some where sceptical, but now after an additional 35lbs lost and the fact that I have competed in many biking and running races, most of my friends have forgotten the old me and have started to ask me for help training them!!

Don't be discouraged or swayed from your path, results will turn the sceptics into believers!

And everyone has been uniformly supportive, though I'm getting now to the point where they're starting to say things like they can't imagine me losing another 25 or 30, which I still need to do. I just smile at them and say, "you haven't seen me naked." That usually shuts them up.

Love it! I'm using that line. :)

Yep. I started my lifestyle change in October 2007. It contributed to my divorce. I did get a lot of sarcastic "good luck with that" type comments for a while. Then I did lose about 100lbs. I met and married another woman... now I'm gaining weight again.

But, yeah, the people issues are as hard as the food & exercise issues.

Other riders I meet still don't take me seriously. :D I'll meet riders for the first time and they will offer me advice on how to complete a 25 miler.:p Then the say, "you can do it if you set your mind to it":roflmao2:

Most everyone in my circle, ESPECIALLY my Health Care People, have been extremely supportive. Every once in a while I get a little "shot" from a stranger or even a "buddy" who wants to know when I turned into such a "Bike F*g". I just consider the source and try to remember why I started doing this in the first place. it's about ME, not them. I really don't care what they think. Keep the faith.

I guess I don't worry about being taken seriously, maybe because I'm not that "serious." I'm doing this for fun, to improve my fitness, and to cut down on how much I use my car, in that order -- with the fun first! I don't really want to become a heavy-duty athlete and enter races or anything, I just want to be fit enough to enjoy doing things outdoors and to feel good. I love reading posts here from people who do centuries or pacelines or major hill climbs, though.

If people don't run me over, that's all the taking-seriously I need. I don't talk a lot about my diet and exercise to people in real life, because I feel like it just opens one up for annoying comments.

I get a tremendous amount of support from friends, family, and acquaintances. There are a very small number of people who can't understand why anyone would enjoy riding a bicycle uphill, but they are all impressed with what the bicycle has done for my weight loss and overall appearance.

I'm pretty sure people don't take me seriously now.

Ive lost 15% of my body weight also and nobody (except my wife and daughter) has ever mentioned it. But that's OK. I don't think it is "noticeable" on a 300lb frame until I get to 20-25%. I also dont sign onto the "sabotage" scenario of friends or family "pushing" fatty foods on me. I think those foods were always there as were the offers, we are just more sensitive as we try to lose weight.

All in all, I think people dont acknowledge our efforts because to them its not that interesting. When somebody drops 100lb it becomes harder to ignore and the comments begin to flow...only another 70lbs to go for me :)

I rode a 45 mile hilly sponsored ride last weekend and I had numerous comments from riders as they passed me of "keep it up" "you can do it" based on my overweight appearance. They equated weight with fitness. Meanwhile, I have completed many 50+ mile hilly-rides and I was not struggling in the least. They were just being nice but felt they had to encourage the fat guy on the bike. So in a way they were not taking me as seriously as the thin riders around me but I understand they were being nice. I also had a guy shoot passed me and yell "Your tires flat" and then when he saw me from the front "Oh OK - sorry dude - keep it going" - heheehehheehehe - what did he mean by that!
By the way, my tires were max inflated and prob my weight spreads them a little :)

Nope, still get no respect.

Riding a bike is just plain fun, it doesn't bother me what anyone else thinks because I am out doing something I enjoy doing. Congrats on your new life style, keep up the great work :thumb:

Hi all! I'm not exactly new but I sort of got away from the bike for a bit. Actually, I was using an indoor bike - now I'm using a REAL bike and I love it! So I came back!

I'm a big gal - I'm hovering just under 270 on a 5'5" frame. I have gotten great support from some people in my life but there are some people who seriously seem to think that my desire to get healthier by riding is "cute" somehow. It's possible that I'm overly sensitive - and maybe I don't trust myself yet that I really am in this for the long haul.

Did people make rude, but well-meaning comments when you were starting? Did they stop as you stuck with it? :)

Yes, people seemed amused by the fact that I was gung-ho about exercising at first.

11 months later, I don't get that anymore.


I love the feeling I get when I zip by people who weigh 100+ pounds less than me, easily going 5mph faster than them... and I haven't even put on my road tires yet! It's an amazing feeling... just goes to show that weight does not directly correlate to fitness.


Keep going, it only gets better!

Random idiots driving by in a car yelling "nice a$$" out the window?


Heh, that exact thing happened to me once... glad to know I'm not the only one who gets it.

Did people make rude, but well-meaning comments when you were starting? Did they stop as you stuck with it? :)

I can laugh at this story...now. But friends and I joke about it all the time.

My good friend and I something mountain bike together Friday mornings. I am a very experienced rider even on the mountain bike. Unfortunately 5 years ago, got cancer, had surgery, gained weight and slowed down a bit.

So I show up for the ride and my friend is there with two ladies she met online. Both were strong but inexperienced riders. Both weighed barely 120 lbs. So as we "fluffy" folks know, no matter how hard we pushed, we can't climb as fast as skinny people - pure physics - can't be done. My friend, who is also a light weight, knows this and she just keeps going 'cause i can catch her downhill (advantage of being bigger).

Anyway, the 4 of us do this particularly, long, difficult climb and I am last. As I reach the top one of the little skinny ladies says "OH. GOOD JOB! YOU DID SO WELL!!!!" The other says "WOW!!! KEEP IT UP!!! AWESOME!!!!!".

Remember I have been riding around 40 years - them 6 months. "Uh OK I just climbed the same hill as you. I'm bigger thus slower. I don't need encouragement but whatever" (I say this to myself). After the third tough hill and the third "GOOD JOB!!! YOU DID SO WELL. AWESOME!!!!!!!!" I gave my friend "stink eye". :mad: She got my drift and says to the skinny ladies "We'll just keep riding, Pam will catch up to us."

I was now climbing happily to myself and did not have to face those annoying words of discouragement until one the ladies got tired and turn around and as I was passing her coming down and I up, she yelled "GOOD JOB...keep it up..." Mood ruined again! :(

Anyway I easily catch up to the other two at the turnaround. Coming down a fairly technical descent, the skinny lady crashed and fell.... This is evil I know, but as I by I said "OH! GOOD TRY. NEXT TIME!!!" I never looked back.:D And to this day I hate the word AWESOME!!!!!

The point of the long story - doesn't matter what anyone else says or thinks - what matters is what you are doing. Always do your ride, your way and be proud of your accomplishments. People who would make snide, petty comments are ignorant and stupid. :notamused:

I'm pretty sure people don't take me seriously now.

You are correct sir! :p

Thalia, I agree completely with your reasons for cycling. People can't patronize you for your level of seriousness when you never implied that you had one in the first place.

I wouldn't fault someone for trying to encourage me, even if it is misplaced.

Random idiots driving by in a car yelling "nice a$$" out the window?

Nobody yells that at me. I feel left out.

Some really good points in the posts above. I'd like to add something for you to think about. Are you doing this for you or for them?

Both were strong but inexperienced riders. Both weighed barely 120 lbs. So as we "fluffy" folks know, no matter how hard we pushed, we can't climb as fast as skinny people - pure physics - can't be done.


I don't believe it! Serious roadracing climbers, but because a rider is lighter, nope! It can be done with proper training! ;)

Some really good points in the posts above. I'd like to add something for you to think about. Are you doing this for you or for them?

Both. I know I'm supposed to say I'm doing it for myself and I mostly am, but part of what I'm doing (and is getting the "isn't that CUTE!?" remarks) is training for a triathlon with Team In Training (we raise money for The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society). They seem to think the idea that a woman who is pushing 270 lbs and has a history of not following through is just silly.

So while I'm doing this for me 99% of the time, I also really, really want to prove them wrong. :)

And there is nothing wrong with that!

I still get some nasty things yelled at me, but less than when I started. I think part of that is because it's obvious that I know what I'm doing now, at least a little, where before... not so much. Also, from the back my Clydehood isn't quite so obvious any more.

My friends and neighbors started to take notice after I dropped the first 50 lbs or so, but many people didn't notice even then. I'm off on vacation next week and will see a bunch of folks who haven't seen me in 6-12 months -- we'll see how that goes.

About a month ago I was riding on a busy country road, no shoulder. There's a very short -- not even 100 yards -- hill that comes out of nowhere and quickly gets up to 8-9%. I always try to let people pass me before I get to it as there's no way they can pass me on it -- you can't see the oncoming traffic over the top of it. No dice this day. The car following me has to wait as I get my far arse up out of the saddle and climb. Once you get over the hill there's a curve, and then a good straight stretch where you can see the oncoming traffic and pass. The car speeds up to go around me and I hear the window roll down. "Great," I think to myself. "Another witty comment about getting my fat behind off the road." I'm all ready to flip the dude off when I see it's the mailman -- he's leaning out the window and giving me a big thumbs up.

Of course, a couple weeks later I was in the same neighborhood and apparently quite amusing to a bunch of kids waiting at a bus stop. So it balances out.

:thumb:

Nobody yells that at me. I feel left out.

I've seen the video. Would it help if I yelled it at the computer screen?

You are correct sir! :p

My worst fears realized!

They still don't. But that's their problem, not mine.

A couple of people laughed at me, but after I ran them over with my bike they weren't laughing anymore:saweeet:. Seriously, though, you have to keep in in perspective. You ride, because you want to ride. It doesn't matter what people think about you while you ride. The only people who should be worried about what they look like or what other people think about them when they ride are professional riders. They can't make a living if they don't look good.

Some really good points in the posts above. I'd like to add something for you to think about. Are you doing this for you or for them?

When I got started, some people made smart ass comments because I believe THEY thought I'd never see it through. When I did, they treated me rudely; almost as though they were pissed because I had succeeded. Granted, that was only a small handful of people, and NOT the ones I'd call "friends." In the end, Jethro is right. Who are you doing this for?

I don't believe it! Serious roadracing climbers, but because a rider is lighter, nope! It can be done with proper training! ;)

True story. What pulls more weight - an 18 wheeler or a Fiat? I rest my case. The engine can make ALL the difference.

I have no idea, I don't ride my bike to lose weight (that would be ridiculous) - that's what my diet is for. I ride my bike to ride a bike, feel the wind in my hair and enjoy getting around town a lot more than I do driving my car. Having calves the size of my (big, big) head is a fringe benefit.

My husband is my biggest cheerleader. Actually, he can be a bit of a bully at times... bless him. :P My dad is right behind him with my SIL a close third. The only bad comments I've had are from vicious-natured teen boys in packs showing out for each other as they yell insults to the fat, gray-haired old woman cycling past. My driving instructor politely asks how much I've ridden as we walk to the car. When I tell him, 'Oh, only 80 km or so this week'. He'll ask what my longest was and if it was 'only 30 km', he shakes his head and admits if he tried to ride that far, it would kill him. ;)

Other than that, I get waves, smiles and thumbs up even from a lot of the hard core cyclists. Nothing like riding in the opposite direction of a large bike race and getting endless encouragement from the participants. :D

I still get some nasty things yelled at me, but less than when I started.


Speak of the devil... just yesterday an a**hole in a pickup screamed "FAT ASS" and threw a beer can at me. The idiot missed, but I was seriously disheartened for a while last night.

I seriously just don't understand what possesses people in this country to think it's alright to verbally abuse and attempt to assault someone who is trying to improve their life. Sigh.

True story. What pulls more weight - an 18 wheeler or a Fiat? I rest my case. The engine can make ALL the difference.

Not sure that's an apt comparison. The Fiat *doesn't have* to carry the weight. Now which one can get up the hill faster? The 18 wheeler with a load, or the fiat with no load?

Speak of the devil... just yesterday an a**hole in a pickup screamed "FAT ASS" and threw a beer can at me. The idiot missed, but I was seriously disheartened for a while last night.

I seriously just don't understand what possesses people in this country to think it's alright to verbally abuse and attempt to assault someone who is trying to improve their life. Sigh.
I am by no means prone to physical violence -- the last time I was in a fight was in the 8th grade, way back in the 70s -- but I fear what I might do if someone did that to me. I know I'd try to catch him and give him a piece of my mind. I'd probably fail, which would certainly be for the best...

True story. What pulls more weight - an 18 wheeler or a Fiat? I rest my case. The engine can make ALL the difference.
Some problems with that analogy:

1) Who wins in an uphill race? I'm betting on the Fiat.

2) You can only train your engine so far. 500 watts is about as far as anyone can get, sustained, and then you're limited by weight.

I'm not saying that Clydes can't climb -- there are plenty of mountain goats on this forum (Hi, Beanz!) who would put the lie to that -- but you're never going to climb like one of those little Fiats.

I don't believe it! Serious roadracing climbers, but because a rider is lighter, nope! It can be done with proper training! ;)

Its physics Beanz... if I have the same skill set/training as someone but I am 200 lbs and they are 100 lbs, they will climb faster. I am a fairly strong climber and of course, can beat some people up hills but with my friends and their abilities, it's almost impossible to hang. Basically I would have to train incredibly hard... and lose 100 lbs to acheive the same results.

Tri-team? You ARE serious! and for a great cause. FWIW, I'm over here taking you very seriously. Let me know if you can take pledges via Paypal from strangers on the Internet.


I also really, really want to prove them wrong.

That is an awesome motivator. ;-)

Love it! I'm using that line. :)

My response to that would be "Ok, now's good".......

On a more serious note, people hate to see others succeed. That's why a neighbor would bring over cookies, that's why some will laugh at you - misery loves company.

And Beanz, your bike friends are right; just stick with it and maybe soon you'll be able to ride 25 miles.....

Tri-team? You ARE serious! and for a great cause. FWIW, I'm over here taking you very seriously. Let me know if you can take pledges via Paypal from strangers on the Internet.



That is an awesome motivator. ;-)

It IS! My boss (that I love and consider a great woman) is one of the ones who isn't being rude but does seem sort of amused by the whole thing. She's not smug...but she's 120 lbs (after two kids). She's one of those people who brings in articles from magazines about how people lost half their weight. She means REALLY well but I do sometimes get offended at the idea that I couldn't possibly be happy if I'm fat.

Then again, she took her girls swimming last weekend. She (who was on swim team in high school some 30 years ago) could barely do 50m. I do 800m, some drills, and then another 800m. I think that sort of showed her I'm not kidding. :)

I do have a donation page (located here (http://pages.teamintraining.org/gat/chitri11/tmontgoxrp)) but they don't take Paypal - just Visa/MC/etc. If that doesn't work for you but you'd like to donate, let me know via PM and we'll work something out. :)

Also - all of you are awesome. This thread has made me feel like I'm not alone and I can know I'm sticking with this and that can be enough - no one else has to believe me (though it's wonderful you guys do).

Now I'm off to "shop" for the bike I'm buying myself for my 30th birthday in September. I love the 20 year old mountain bike a co-worker loaned me for a few months but...I'm thinking a hybrid that weighs less than 3435343 pounds would be good. ;)

I just got weird looks when I first started...then I got "wow you have a lot of endurance for how you look" ..(?) and now I'm getting "hey, the bike has been really good for you" "you look more in shape" so it gets better!

Speak of the devil... just yesterday an a**hole in a pickup screamed "FAT ASS" and threw a beer can at me. The idiot missed, but I was seriously disheartened for a while last night.

I seriously just don't understand what possesses people in this country to think it's alright to verbally abuse and attempt to assault someone who is trying to improve their life. Sigh.

I honestly couldn't care what other people yell. However, if they throw things at me that's a different story. I'd make a mental note of the vehicle, as much of the licenses plate as I could get and immediately pull over and call the police.

And I've been waiting for a perfect scenario (credit to Winston Churchill for the idea) - person in car yells "hey fat ass" at me as I ride, I catch up to them at the next stop light or stop sign, I yell "I'm losing weight and getting in shape, you'll be stupid for life." *sigh* So far I haven't even gotten yelled at. :D

I'm probably not truly a clyde, (on the outside), but I do have fairly good support. It's more along the lines of people saying "Oh, he is riding a bike.", and that is about as far a their concern goes. My wife rides with me about 30% of my distance on average, and thats always fun. I thought I had her support 100% until I showed her the cost of even entry level road bikes :). I feel that it's probably slipped now to about 80%..lol

Nobody yells that at me. I feel left out.

I'll have you know that when I was in high school (and skinny) somebody yelled that at me once, and now that I"m 6'2" and not as skinny.... er, nowhere near (240) and I got it again I have to think I must really have a nice ass. LOL