View Full Version : cager frustration haikus
Here is your chance to vent about cagers and share with others!
A haiku should have 5 syllables in the first line, 7 in the second, and 5 is the last. Somewhere, there should be a seasonal or seasonal specific reference.
Here's mine:
Diesel fumes in the
Cold autumn air, I pedal
With dinosaur cars.
vincenzosi
11-17-04, 11:35 AM
Bullseye on my back
Colored clothes on my body
I'm not a target
gcasillo
11-17-04, 12:06 PM
Idle melody
Notes locked behind black bars as
I strum, strum away
BeTheChange
11-17-04, 01:29 PM
One more drunk driver
Remove his still-beating heart
Snack for the ride home
JavaMan
11-17-04, 02:11 PM
I don't stop for signs.
I don't stop for traffic lights.
I stop for coffee.
We have no seasons.
Is cager slang for driver?
I wrote two haikus!
Tom
bkrownd
11-17-04, 02:17 PM
Cold November rain
I can't see through my glasses
Oops, I'm upside-down
Seasons, bikes and automobiles are too many subjects to fit into 17 syllables.
From the car driver's perspective:
Left my cul de sac
Talking on an urgent call
One less bike out there
bkrownd
11-17-04, 04:04 PM
Floating through the air
My bike and I fly so high
When launched by a Ford
gcasillo
11-17-04, 05:09 PM
"Get off of the road!"
He exclaims and I reply
"Stick it in your hole."
ajay677
11-17-04, 07:02 PM
spinning down the road
fluorescent clothes, lights flashing
still invisible
salix27
11-18-04, 01:09 AM
Fatty advises
I should move more when she honks
Fatty was a biatch :rolleyes:
Johnny_Monkey
11-18-04, 02:30 AM
Winter's bite chills me
Soccer mom can't drive on ice
Terror keeps me warm
hahaha, "terror keeps me warm" very good..
....
who thought of this word
cager sounds very silly
I will not use it
;)
Ivan Hanz
11-18-04, 10:27 AM
Save on Gas Money
Spend on Pasta and Upgrades
Cold Beer and X-Rays
Johnny Monkey's my favorite so far. I like haiku i can empathize with. Good thread :)
My street's a bullring
Now, an SUV charges!
Ole, gass guzzler!
Falling of the leaves,
Falling of the bicyclist
My knee bleeds bright red
Fat ass redneck drives
Cold wind of rage in his heart
His beer bottle flies
Hmmm, need to work on this a little more. My first haikus.
Birds sing at sunrise
Car passes within inches
Do not give finger
Glass shards in the night
Make the bridge glittering bright
Flat tire in the rain
Even when bad drivers
Suffer their wretched lifestyle
I arrive smiling
The truck cuts me off
Is my health insurance paid?
Time for a new bike
LittleBigMan
11-18-04, 06:45 PM
I love haiku, man
It's been a while since I wrote
Too long, I'm afraid
The sun brightly shines
The pavement glistens like stars
What was I saying?
Cars pass in a wave
I am in my element
Do they have a clue?
Truck stealing my breath
Waiting on some fresher air
Ahh, that's better, now
Why don't I fit in?
Am I that much different?
But of course, I am.
You are the leader
I am the rebellious one
Should you follow me?
What I do, I love
What I love, I do more of
Is that what you do?
Don't follow the crowd
Swimming downstream is easy
Try standing up, now
Big Benz roars aloud
unworthy pedaller slows
and moves to the left
God d**ned traffic sucks a**
Son of a b***h cut me off
Pump him full of lead
These f**king bikers
Be passing me at the light
I'm still waiting here
If I catch up then
Run these b***hes over
Mofo traffic here
Oh d**n it, f**k me!
Yeah, you over there, f**k you!
D**n it, f**k all y'all!
I think that pretty much realistically sums up the frustrations of a driver stuck in traffic.
jeff williams
11-18-04, 07:25 PM
Bare trees claw the sky
The winds no longer my friend
Warm cars passing laugh
Fossil behemouths
Roaring indifferently
Tracking them in snow
Steaming sewer grate
Please do not eat my front wheel
Face to ice, hot tears
Alley of darkness
But I fear not the evil
Lock it or lose it
My glasses fogging
The sun rises behind me
Now I see my breath
bentrox!
03-09-05, 08:57 PM
Just thought I'd resurrect this thread to inform you poet laureates about something some of you may already know about. Bicyling magazine's 2005 contest is haiku (until April 30). Win a $4,999.00 bike of your choice if your haiku is deemed supreme.
http://www.bicycling.com/winabike
thechrisproject
03-09-05, 09:00 PM
See the big cars roam
upon all the roads in town.
Damn, this ****ing sucks.
An old Ford Bronco
"Oh my God, are you OK?"
Get up and ride home.
EDIT:
Wasn't a haiku
Fixed with BikeForums' edit
No need to worry.
thechrisproject
03-09-05, 09:47 PM
Entries must be complete, original to entrant and not submitted to or published by any other publication.
I wonder if having it on bikeforums.net consitutes publication?
iowarose
03-09-05, 10:03 PM
The cager now swerves
His cell phone is ringing
I brake on black ice.
bentrox!
03-09-05, 10:07 PM
I wonder if having it on bikeforums.net consitutes publication?
I doubt it. As an on-line forum, which is like a public soap box/bulletin board, there is no copyright protection. So be careful of someone lifting your haiku here and posting it as their own in the contest.
muccapazza
03-09-05, 10:26 PM
I doubt it. As an on-line forum, which is like a public soap box/bulletin board, there is no copyright protection. So be careful of someone lifting your haiku here and posting it as their own in the contest.
It is shocking
what some people would do
for a $5000 bike.
moxfyre
03-09-05, 10:32 PM
It is shocking
what some people would do
for a $5000 bike.
I would sell my soul
For a brand new Campy clad
Carbon fiber steed
moxfyre
03-09-05, 10:35 PM
My simple fixie
Roars as it transcends traffic
Cagers are jealous
bentrox!
03-09-05, 10:47 PM
It is shocking
what some people would do
for a $5000 bike.
This world is harsh
Some people can be unkind
Keep heads-up always.
PaperBoy
03-10-05, 08:25 AM
My wide outer lane.
Cager passing on the right.
Now the lane is his.
galen_52657
03-10-05, 08:34 AM
Spring has sprung, the grass
Will rise. My bike and I fly
Past the glass-n-steel
Paul L.
03-10-05, 10:26 AM
saliva on me
Oh curse his childrens children
Fat cager speeds off
Sunrise saturday,
I was biking the backroads,
lost in the moment.
Bubba in a truck,
thinks he is so cool yelling,
I'm sport for morons.
dumb cager on bike,
I drop him like lead balloon,
I can dream can't I?
They whine always whine,
about traffic, and their health,
the answer's simple.
SpokesInMyPoop
03-10-05, 01:24 PM
omg I <3 haikus.
A bright flash of light
Cracked windshield, angry cager
Please call 911
p.s. you all wrote some awesome haikus :)
powers2b
03-10-05, 02:25 PM
I enjoy Haikus
Especially about bikes
Make this thread sticky
My bike runs on carbs
How much does gas cost this spring?
Pity the cager
moxfyre
03-10-05, 05:02 PM
I love to ride bikes
This morn I saw a red fox
Hunting by the trail
moxfyre
03-10-05, 05:03 PM
dead skunks smell like ****
honkers can kiss my fat ass
i hate the wind lots!
This thread lacked something
A certain "je ne sais quoi"
Till Merton posted
LittleBigMan
03-10-05, 05:08 PM
Just thought I'd resurrect this thread to inform you poet laureates about something some of you may already know about. Bicyling magazine's 2005 contest is haiku (until April 30). Win a $4,999.00 bike of your choice if your haiku is deemed supreme.
http://www.bicycling.com/winabike
I can't dare to hope
To win the bent(s) of my choice
To dispair is vain
Who am I really?
I am greater than I know
What've I got to lose?
Nothing is ventured
Than nothing is ever gained
Go for it, you fool!
Thanks, mighty Bentrox
I'll see you in the papers
I'll be on a bent.
But if I don't win
At least I did not give up
Lose without a fight.
moxfyre
03-10-05, 05:12 PM
...
But if I don't win
At least I did not give up
Lose without a fight.
As for that contest
What of multiple entries?
Are they permitted?
My trek bike is red
My helmets black and silver
I'm fighting the blues
A day on my bike
Is far better than driving
I don't want a car
77Univega
03-10-05, 07:07 PM
... I'm sport for morons.
- - Well said.
Cagers in gridlock
Backed up in evening's traffic
It's not my problem
JohnBrooking
03-10-05, 08:17 PM
Ice is annoying,
freezing slush in brakes and gears.
Can't wait for summer.
"Running lights?" I asked (http://www.bikeforums.net/showthread.php?t=83325).
Lit up like a Christmas tree!
Thanks, 2manybikes!
Haikus can be fun.
But already up too late.
Now to bed, good-night!
sbhikes
03-10-05, 09:02 PM
Here are some recumbent haikus
My bike is yellow
Shaped like a bolt of lightning
Head wind? What head wind?
Riding a beach chair
Where is my margarita?
On my way to work
That's not a real bike!
Is it as fast as mine is?
You'd never beat Lance
Hey, cool bike! Comfy?
Back pain? Wrist pain? Neck pain? No!
How much did it cost?
Where's your beard, lady?
Where's your Santa Claus belly?
Blond girls don't ride 'bents!
Been riding a bike
for decades now, but this is
like starting over
Spinning up a hill
A spandex guy passes me
Down I zoom. Bye bye!
This is fun.
PaperBoy
03-11-05, 07:42 AM
Soccer mom: small.
SUV: mighty and tall.
Please, hang up and drive.
sbhikes
03-11-05, 09:09 AM
Blinding the daylight
in my bright yellow jacket
cell-phone guy brakes hard
Mr. Miskatonic
03-11-05, 09:14 AM
Cagers do Complain:
"You Never Stop at stop Sign"
For them, roll is stop.
Cagers wait in row.
Oh No! Biker at Stop Sign!
Two cars cross as one.
Yak Yackity Yak.
Merges without a glance.
Cell is her finger.
keevohn
03-11-05, 09:23 AM
Smart and witty posts
A true man of intellect:
MERTON, my hero.
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