Advocacy & Safety - cager frustration haikus

Here is your chance to vent about cagers and share with others!

A haiku should have 5 syllables in the first line, 7 in the second, and 5 is the last. Somewhere, there should be a seasonal or seasonal specific reference.

Here's mine:

Diesel fumes in the
Cold autumn air, I pedal
With dinosaur cars.

Bullseye on my back
Colored clothes on my body
I'm not a target

Idle melody
Notes locked behind black bars as
I strum, strum away

One more drunk driver
Remove his still-beating heart
Snack for the ride home

i fart like the wind
i speed like the huge ass train
i slow on wet turns

I don't stop for signs.
I don't stop for traffic lights.
I stop for coffee.

We have no seasons.
Is cager slang for driver?
I wrote two haikus!

Tom

Cold November rain
I can't see through my glasses
Oops, I'm upside-down

Seasons, bikes and automobiles are too many subjects to fit into 17 syllables.

From the car driver's perspective:

Left my cul de sac
Talking on an urgent call
One less bike out there

Floating through the air
My bike and I fly so high
When launched by a Ford

"Get off of the road!"
He exclaims and I reply
"Stick it in your hole."

spinning down the road
fluorescent clothes, lights flashing
still invisible

Fatty advises
I should move more when she honks
Fatty was a biatch :rolleyes:

Winter's bite chills me
Soccer mom can't drive on ice
Terror keeps me warm

hahaha, "terror keeps me warm" very good..

....

who thought of this word
cager sounds very silly
I will not use it

;)

Save on Gas Money
Spend on Pasta and Upgrades
Cold Beer and X-Rays

Johnny Monkey's my favorite so far. I like haiku i can empathize with. Good thread :)

My street's a bullring
Now, an SUV charges!
Ole, gass guzzler!

Falling of the leaves,
Falling of the bicyclist
My knee bleeds bright red

Fat ass redneck drives
Cold wind of rage in his heart
His beer bottle flies

Hmmm, need to work on this a little more. My first haikus.

Birds sing at sunrise
Car passes within inches
Do not give finger

Glass shards in the night
Make the bridge glittering bright
Flat tire in the rain

Even when bad drivers
Suffer their wretched lifestyle
I arrive smiling

The truck cuts me off
Is my health insurance paid?
Time for a new bike

I love haiku, man
It's been a while since I wrote
Too long, I'm afraid

The sun brightly shines
The pavement glistens like stars
What was I saying?

Cars pass in a wave
I am in my element
Do they have a clue?

Truck stealing my breath
Waiting on some fresher air
Ahh, that's better, now

Why don't I fit in?
Am I that much different?
But of course, I am.

You are the leader
I am the rebellious one
Should you follow me?

What I do, I love
What I love, I do more of
Is that what you do?

Don't follow the crowd
Swimming downstream is easy
Try standing up, now

Big Benz roars aloud
unworthy pedaller slows
and moves to the left

God d**ned traffic sucks a**
Son of a b***h cut me off
Pump him full of lead

These f**king bikers
Be passing me at the light
I'm still waiting here

If I catch up then
Run these b***hes over
Mofo traffic here

Oh d**n it, f**k me!
Yeah, you over there, f**k you!
D**n it, f**k all y'all!

I think that pretty much realistically sums up the frustrations of a driver stuck in traffic.

Bare trees claw the sky
The winds no longer my friend

Warm cars passing laugh





Fossil behemouths
Roaring indifferently

Tracking them in snow





Steaming sewer grate
Please do not eat my front wheel

Face to ice, hot tears

Alley of darkness
But I fear not the evil
Lock it or lose it

My glasses fogging
The sun rises behind me
Now I see my breath

Just thought I'd resurrect this thread to inform you poet laureates about something some of you may already know about. Bicyling magazine's 2005 contest is haiku (until April 30). Win a $4,999.00 bike of your choice if your haiku is deemed supreme.

http://www.bicycling.com/winabike

See the big cars roam
upon all the roads in town.
Damn, this ****ing sucks.

An old Ford Bronco
"Oh my God, are you OK?"
Get up and ride home.

EDIT:
Wasn't a haiku
Fixed with BikeForums' edit
No need to worry.

Entries must be complete, original to entrant and not submitted to or published by any other publication.
I wonder if having it on bikeforums.net consitutes publication?

The cager now swerves
His cell phone is ringing
I brake on black ice.

I wonder if having it on bikeforums.net consitutes publication?
I doubt it. As an on-line forum, which is like a public soap box/bulletin board, there is no copyright protection. So be careful of someone lifting your haiku here and posting it as their own in the contest.

I doubt it. As an on-line forum, which is like a public soap box/bulletin board, there is no copyright protection. So be careful of someone lifting your haiku here and posting it as their own in the contest.
It is shocking
what some people would do
for a $5000 bike.

It is shocking
what some people would do
for a $5000 bike.
I would sell my soul
For a brand new Campy clad
Carbon fiber steed

My simple fixie
Roars as it transcends traffic
Cagers are jealous

It is shocking
what some people would do
for a $5000 bike.
This world is harsh
Some people can be unkind
Keep heads-up always.

My wide outer lane.
Cager passing on the right.
Now the lane is his.

Spring has sprung, the grass
Will rise. My bike and I fly
Past the glass-n-steel

saliva on me
Oh curse his childrens children
Fat cager speeds off

Sunrise saturday,
I was biking the backroads,
lost in the moment.

Bubba in a truck,
thinks he is so cool yelling,
I'm sport for morons.

dumb cager on bike,
I drop him like lead balloon,
I can dream can't I?

They whine always whine,
about traffic, and their health,
the answer's simple.

omg I <3 haikus.

A bright flash of light
Cracked windshield, angry cager
Please call 911

p.s. you all wrote some awesome haikus :)

I enjoy Haikus
Especially about bikes
Make this thread sticky

My bike runs on carbs
How much does gas cost this spring?
Pity the cager

dead skunks smell like ****
honkers can kiss my fat ass
i hate the wind lots!

I love to ride bikes
This morn I saw a red fox
Hunting by the trail

dead skunks smell like ****
honkers can kiss my fat ass
i hate the wind lots!
This thread lacked something
A certain "je ne sais quoi"
Till Merton posted

Just thought I'd resurrect this thread to inform you poet laureates about something some of you may already know about. Bicyling magazine's 2005 contest is haiku (until April 30). Win a $4,999.00 bike of your choice if your haiku is deemed supreme.

http://www.bicycling.com/winabike
I can't dare to hope
To win the bent(s) of my choice
To dispair is vain

Who am I really?
I am greater than I know
What've I got to lose?

Nothing is ventured
Than nothing is ever gained
Go for it, you fool!

Thanks, mighty Bentrox
I'll see you in the papers
I'll be on a bent.

But if I don't win
At least I did not give up
Lose without a fight.

...

But if I don't win
At least I did not give up
Lose without a fight.

As for that contest
What of multiple entries?
Are they permitted?

My trek bike is red
My helmets black and silver
I'm fighting the blues


A day on my bike
Is far better than driving
I don't want a car

... I'm sport for morons.

- - Well said.

Cagers in gridlock
Backed up in evening's traffic
It's not my problem

Ice is annoying,
freezing slush in brakes and gears.
Can't wait for summer.

"Running lights?" I asked (http://www.bikeforums.net/showthread.php?t=83325).
Lit up like a Christmas tree!
Thanks, 2manybikes!

Haikus can be fun.
But already up too late.
Now to bed, good-night!

Here are some recumbent haikus


My bike is yellow
Shaped like a bolt of lightning
Head wind? What head wind?

Riding a beach chair
Where is my margarita?
On my way to work

That's not a real bike!
Is it as fast as mine is?
You'd never beat Lance

Hey, cool bike! Comfy?
Back pain? Wrist pain? Neck pain? No!
How much did it cost?

Where's your beard, lady?
Where's your Santa Claus belly?
Blond girls don't ride 'bents!

Been riding a bike
for decades now, but this is
like starting over

Spinning up a hill
A spandex guy passes me
Down I zoom. Bye bye!


This is fun.

Soccer mom: small.
SUV: mighty and tall.
Please, hang up and drive.

Blinding the daylight
in my bright yellow jacket
cell-phone guy brakes hard