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  1. #1
    Infamous Member chipcom's Avatar
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    Revenge of the Clydes

    Last edited by chipcom; 08-12-07 at 10:13 PM.
    "Let us hope our weapons are never needed --but do not forget what the common people knew when they demanded the Bill of Rights: An armed citizenry is the first defense, the best defense, and the final defense against tyranny. If guns are outlawed, only the government will have guns. Only the police, the secret police, the military, the hired servants of our rulers. Only the government -- and a few outlaws. I intend to be among the outlaws" - Edward Abbey

  2. #2
    Infamous Member chipcom's Avatar
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    Share your stories of getting some pwnage on some skinny feller who had it coming and underestimated the power of a Clyde.
    I figure Beanz has got a few, since he's a climbing machine!
    "Let us hope our weapons are never needed --but do not forget what the common people knew when they demanded the Bill of Rights: An armed citizenry is the first defense, the best defense, and the final defense against tyranny. If guns are outlawed, only the government will have guns. Only the police, the secret police, the military, the hired servants of our rulers. Only the government -- and a few outlaws. I intend to be among the outlaws" - Edward Abbey

  3. #3
    The Site Administrator: Currently at home recovering from a couple of strokes,please contact my assistnt admins for forum issues Tom Stormcrowe's Avatar
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    Best Pwnage I have is a guy I dropped in Fort Wayne with my old Schwinn, which is a touring bike, by the way, with rack and low touring gears. He passed me and gave me the "look"©, and snickered about my 20 year old bike. He was on a Madone and in full team kit, by the way. He irritated me, so I upped the cadence, passed him back, he tried to pass me again and ran out of wind, I guess. "It's not the ride, it's the engine" was what I told him when he caught up to me when I was taking a little stretch. He was still panting, by the way......
    on light duty due to illness; please contact my assistants for forum issues. They are Siu Blue Wind, or CbadRider or the other 3 star folk. I am currently at home recovering from a couple of strokes. I am making good progress, happily.


    . “He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.”- Fredrick Nietzsche

    "We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." - Immanuel Kant

  4. #4
    Senior Member Thomasdregos's Avatar
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    Not really a pwned but I thought it funny that I was passing a roadie on Dry Mill road, which parallels the W&OD trail (a Rails to Trails bike path that is very level compared to Dry Mill), that I was on. I own a hybrid wear whatever t-shirt and shorts that are clean and I am hardly a fast cyclist!

  5. #5
    Senior Member jaxgtr's Avatar
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    My best was when I went to my first organized ride and had signed up for the 50 mile route and the VP where my wife works was there with his trophy wife and he was shocked that I was riding the 50 mile course. Even though I had lost 62 lbs at that point and was in very good riding condition, he pointed out the sag wagon. I told him thanks and moved on.

    After I finished and was getting ready to leave, I saw the the trophy wife at her car putting her bike up and walked over with my wife and I asked where Mr. Wonderful was. Just about that time, the SAG wagon pulled up and he came out and the look on his face was just priceless as he saw me talking to his, now ex-wife. It took him about 10 minutes to come over and face the music cause I wasn't leaving until he came back to his car. One day my wife went down to his office and and put a new office placard on his door that read, VP of SAG Wagon. Just Priceless.
    Brian | 2015 Cannondale Synapse Carbon 3 | 2014 Trek CrossRip Comp | 2013 Cannondale SuperSix (for sale)
    Quote Originally Posted by AEO View Post
    you should learn to embrace change, and mock it's failings every step of the way.

  6. #6
    Chubby super biker bdinger's Avatar
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    Probably my most... psychotic (for lack of a better term, LOL!) was my absolutely brutal drop of some kid. All of these stories occur on the MUP, and I'm either messing with my bike computer or my iPod at the time. This time I was messing with my GPS on the MTB. Well, some kid on a REALLY nice full-suspension MTB decided he'd "drop" my big butt on my Hardrock Sport. Not only did he do that, but he turned around and gave me a gesture and a laugh as he did. As they say, at that point it was on like Donkey Kong.

    But I didn't just drop him, no, I BRUTALLY dropped him. He definitely wasn't going fast enough to be so cocky, but I knew that a drop on flat MUP just wouldn't suffice. About two miles up the path, however, there is a nice little gradual grade that peaks at around 7%. So, for the next 1.9 miles I got on his rear tire and did my best acting job to date. While he kept turning around with some huffing and puffing, I did my best to act like I was about to explode. You know, full on wheezing and contorted face.. all that stuff.

    As we approached the hill I backed off a bit to simulate a bonk, but really to let some distance gain between us. That's when I took it up from the ~80% I'd been at to a full 100% attack of doom. As I flew past him, I yelled at the top of my lungs (and I'm LOUD) "WOOO! HOW DO YA LIKE THAT !@#!@ #$@! BOY!?" To add salt to the wound when I crested the hill I looked back at him, waved, laughed, and smiled.

    The second one happened last week. A nice little roadie on his shiny Cannondale decided to drop me as I was futzing with my iPod. See I know it's a Cannondale because the bike had it plastered all over it's frame, and were that not enough he also had a mini-billboard on his backside. And jersey. And helmet. He turned, laughed, shook his head, then attempted to drop.

    Well, said roadie didn't take two things into account. First, never try to drop a guy who has just fired up White Zombie on his iPod. Second, never ever ever try to drop a guy who really loves nothing more than messing with skinny people who try to mess with big guys on bikes. For the next two and a half miles I let loose a sprint that even I didn't realize I had in me.

    Yup, for three miles I went nuts-out, my heart rate peaked and stayed at 182-185 for about two of those three miles as we blasted down the flat MUP at a hair over 30mph. He kept turning around, and every time he saw a jumbo sized man with wild determination in his eyes sucking right on the rear tire of his precious c-dale. I proved to him that he couldn't drop me no matter how hard he tried, and was setting myself up to attack that same previously mentioned hill in such a manner as to make him cry home on his "HANDMADE IN THE USA" (couple of those stickers, too) Cannondale.

    However, he did drop me. But doing one of the most darwin-award-worthy street crossings I've ever seen, he dropped me and as he went into the distance seemingly imploded just as I did . But my point had been made, and yet another roadie now knows "clyde power".

    Stuff like this happens almost daily to me, it must be something with some other cyclists that they feel the need to drop the big guy on the hybrid/MTB. Or the ones who always try to step it up as I pass them. Oh well, if they REALLY want to feel like idiots...

  7. #7
    On my TARDIScycle! KingTermite's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by chipcom View Post
    Share your stories of getting some pwnage on some skinny feller who had it coming and underestimated the power of a Clyde.
    I figure Beanz has got a few, since he's a climbing machine!
    I wouldn't say I have a lot of major stories getting one over on the skinny guy. The only one that comes to mind is riding with a small group where some skinny guy came once. He was being all too condescending asking me if I could make the upcoming hill. When I got to the downhill and used my "downhill muscle", I passed him and got far enough I had to eventually slow down to let the group catch up.


    <not cycling related>
    Then there was the time as a teen a friend of mine who's dad had a boat got a group going out in the boat. Him, me and two girls (his dad driving). When stopped out in the water near an island, he challenges "big boy" to a swimming race. He was being a real azz bag and trying to embarrass me in front of the girls to make himself look good.

    Well, I was a pretty good swimmer having grown up with grandparents (next door) who had a pool. So I accept and we do a fairly short race (maybe 100-150 yards). And in that short of a distance, I still beat him by about 6-7 body lengths.

    He was so embarrassed after that he wouldn't talk to anybody for the rest of the afternoon.
    </not cycling related>
    Quote Originally Posted by coffeecake View Post
    - it's pretty well established that Hitler was an *******.

  8. #8
    Infamous Member chipcom's Avatar
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    Point of order: A roadie trying to race on a MUP is a muppie (or muppet), not a roadie.
    "Let us hope our weapons are never needed --but do not forget what the common people knew when they demanded the Bill of Rights: An armed citizenry is the first defense, the best defense, and the final defense against tyranny. If guns are outlawed, only the government will have guns. Only the police, the secret police, the military, the hired servants of our rulers. Only the government -- and a few outlaws. I intend to be among the outlaws" - Edward Abbey

  9. #9
    The Site Administrator: Currently at home recovering from a couple of strokes,please contact my assistnt admins for forum issues Tom Stormcrowe's Avatar
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    What's a 25 or 30 year old roadie on a Madone in kit who gets ate for lunch by a 47 year old clyde on a heavy touring bike? (Besides embarrassed and PWNED!)
    on light duty due to illness; please contact my assistants for forum issues. They are Siu Blue Wind, or CbadRider or the other 3 star folk. I am currently at home recovering from a couple of strokes. I am making good progress, happily.


    . “He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.”- Fredrick Nietzsche

    "We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." - Immanuel Kant

  10. #10
    Senior Member rjm1982's Avatar
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    I haven't been on the bike long enough for a bike story...

    But somone tried to snatch my wallet about a year ago. So dude grabs and bails..

    Now, I don't generally run, but the "Oh no, you di'int" attitude kicks in... I ran him down over about 3/4 of a mile at full speed. Now...I have never done this before, and never since ... i was actually sick the next day... not sure if the run had anything to do with it.

    But I tell you what, when he turned around and saw 300lbs of pissed-off behind him, he finally decided to drop the wallet.

    Never underestimate the power of momentum...

  11. #11
    Keep on, keepin on B Piddy's Avatar
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    Wow interesting story chipper. Roadies hardly ever give me a hard time. I think they're scared of me cause I can usually hold my own with them plus I think they realize that I could snap them in half if they got on my bad side.
    04 Giant Sedona
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  12. #12
    Infamous Member chipcom's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tom Stormcrowe View Post
    What's a 25 or 30 year old roadie on a Madone in kit who gets ate for lunch by a 47 year old clyde on a heavy touring bike? (Besides embarrassed and PWNED!)
    Do I have to say it? POSEUR!
    "Let us hope our weapons are never needed --but do not forget what the common people knew when they demanded the Bill of Rights: An armed citizenry is the first defense, the best defense, and the final defense against tyranny. If guns are outlawed, only the government will have guns. Only the police, the secret police, the military, the hired servants of our rulers. Only the government -- and a few outlaws. I intend to be among the outlaws" - Edward Abbey

  13. #13
    Senior Member Terrierman's Avatar
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    I dropped my grandson on the way to Spring Street Park one time. But I let him catch back up when he started to cry. Does that count?
    It's all downhill from here. Except the parts that are uphill.

  14. #14
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    First, in regards to your post in the link - that's awesome.

    I don't have any good stories of me dropping anybody except for the occasional senior citizen with two prostethic legs. I'm still getting into shape. In fact, in the last night ride on the towpath I rode I was the last one back by about 1/2 hour. That gravel sucks.

    Anyway, I did Eddy's Sweet Corn Challenge a couple of weekends ago which takes you through the rolling acres of Richfield Twp. Man, I'm glad I signed up for the 25 mile route and not the 50. As I was going up the hills I kept thinking to myself, this is the punishment I get for being out of shape and overweight. I smiled as the skinny roadies passed me. Luckily for me they were all friendly. I did, however, smile when I passed them back up on the way down. There's nothing like hitting 40mph coasting and passing them all back up again! I would then say to myslef "This is the reward for all that hard work on the way up".

    Where is that hill you took your wife up? I might have to check it out someday as I really need to do more work on hills.

    Steve

    P.S. - Here is a link to my ride if you are curious of the route ==> http://trail.motionbased.com/trail/i...kValue=3485297
    Last edited by Huzzah; 08-13-07 at 03:09 PM. Reason: Spelling and to add link.

  15. #15
    The Site Administrator: Currently at home recovering from a couple of strokes,please contact my assistnt admins for forum issues Tom Stormcrowe's Avatar
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    On the flip side, I got a true PWNing by a 75 year old Amishman on a 1930's Humber 3 speed! This happened to me up north of Fort Wayne, that old Amishman could MOVE!
    on light duty due to illness; please contact my assistants for forum issues. They are Siu Blue Wind, or CbadRider or the other 3 star folk. I am currently at home recovering from a couple of strokes. I am making good progress, happily.


    . “He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.”- Fredrick Nietzsche

    "We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." - Immanuel Kant

  16. #16
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    so I was on my morning commute, this was before I started commuting on my Lemond, the bike I have that is my commuter is set up as a touring bike, steel frame, MTB 29er wheels and and touring crank, needless to say it is a heavy bike with flat bars.

    I'm just moving along and get passed by a roadie, now I have a back pack on and i'm commuting not really trying to move fast, just keep my pace. So as he flies by me he pretty much lets out a bit of a snicker. Not that I'm all the competitive, but I decide to pace him, with out much effort (yeah I know he's in the pull position) I was able to stay right on his rear wheel, I do this for a bit over 4 miles staying about 8 feet off of his rear wheel, as we are approaching my turn to work he decides he needs to make a phone call, slows pulls out his cell phone and slows down just as I was getting ready to blow by him before my turn off to the last stretch before work. Guess he just didn't want to get passed my a Clyde with out some excuse .

    One thing about big heavy steel bikes, when you get them rolling they really roll very well
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  17. #17
    Senior Member Bill Kapaun's Avatar
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    I admit I have far more people pass me than the other way around. There's really no reason anybody SHOULD'T be able to pass me!
    I do however get to "enjoy" the occasional "pre-teen" that blows by me on his Magna and turns around to give me "the look". I just maintain my pace and often catch them a mile or so down the road with their tongue hanging out. I just love THEIR knobby tires! "The Great Equalizer".

  18. #18
    AKA Nathan Dr_Robert's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bdinger View Post
    Or the ones who always try to step it up as I pass them. Oh well, if they REALLY want to feel like idiots...
    ROFL, happens to me all the time. They don't realize that I almost never attack to pass on a MUP (or on the street, for that matter... I only attack to pass cars). If I blow by them doing 17-18 MPH, that's the pace I've been holding for the last 10 miles... and the pace I'll be holding for the next 10 miles as well. It's like they expect me to slow down and go back to my "normal" pace at any minute, and they just wear themselves out trying to hold my wheel.

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  19. #19
    Infamous Member chipcom's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Terrierman View Post
    I dropped my grandson on the way to Spring Street Park one time. But I let him catch back up when he started to cry. Does that count?
    pwned by the crying...toughen up, gramps!
    "Let us hope our weapons are never needed --but do not forget what the common people knew when they demanded the Bill of Rights: An armed citizenry is the first defense, the best defense, and the final defense against tyranny. If guns are outlawed, only the government will have guns. Only the police, the secret police, the military, the hired servants of our rulers. Only the government -- and a few outlaws. I intend to be among the outlaws" - Edward Abbey

  20. #20
    Squirrel solveg's Avatar
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    I just have no idea what you guys are all talking about! Am I supposed to race people who come up behind me? Are they expecting me to?

    Because I'm not going to!

  21. #21
    Senior Member jaxgtr's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Terrierman View Post
    I dropped my grandson on the way to Spring Street Park one time. But I let him catch back up when he started to cry. Does that count?
    That absolutely counts. I think they call that learning by example. Unless I think it will get them killed, I have no problem letting my kids do something stupid just once so they will remember it.
    Brian | 2015 Cannondale Synapse Carbon 3 | 2014 Trek CrossRip Comp | 2013 Cannondale SuperSix (for sale)
    Quote Originally Posted by AEO View Post
    you should learn to embrace change, and mock it's failings every step of the way.

  22. #22
    The Site Administrator: Currently at home recovering from a couple of strokes,please contact my assistnt admins for forum issues Tom Stormcrowe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by solveg View Post
    I just have no idea what you guys are all talking about! Am I supposed to race people who come up behind me? Are they expecting me to?

    Because I'm not going to!
    It's a male testosterone driven will to dominate other guys thing, Solveg. It's just a part of the fun side of being a guy is all.
    on light duty due to illness; please contact my assistants for forum issues. They are Siu Blue Wind, or CbadRider or the other 3 star folk. I am currently at home recovering from a couple of strokes. I am making good progress, happily.


    . “He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.”- Fredrick Nietzsche

    "We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." - Immanuel Kant

  23. #23
    Squirrel solveg's Avatar
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    so is pwned the same as "dropping" someone? What does pwned stand for... "passing when not entirely deserving?" "passed with nasty expression and determination?"

  24. #24
    The Site Administrator: Currently at home recovering from a couple of strokes,please contact my assistnt admins for forum issues Tom Stormcrowe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by solveg View Post
    so is pwned the same as "dropping" someone? What does pwned stand for... "passing when not entirely deserving?" "passed with nasty expression and determination?"
    Oh, it comes from a mistake in a videogame. I can't remember which one right off the bat when your character dies, the machine was supposed to "OWN" you and the programmer missed a typo and it came out with your have been "PWNED" instead of "Owned", and the rest is Haxor history.
    on light duty due to illness; please contact my assistants for forum issues. They are Siu Blue Wind, or CbadRider or the other 3 star folk. I am currently at home recovering from a couple of strokes. I am making good progress, happily.


    . “He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.”- Fredrick Nietzsche

    "We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." - Immanuel Kant

  25. #25
    Squirrel solveg's Avatar
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    Ah! On the line of All Your Base Are Belong To Us... OK, continue.

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